folly's going back

mushroom attacked folly yesterday morning, landing us at the e-vet to get her face and the roof of her mouth fixed. they had to anesthetize her, obviously. waking up from anesthesia, she had a small seizure.

last night she had three more grand mal seizures. i took her back to the e-vet who gave her a loading dose of phenobarbital, sent her home with phenobarb pills, and let me have a dose of valium to give iv if she seizures again.

i can't deal with this. i feel really freaking awful about it, especially since i knew she'd had issues as a baby puppy, but i just cannot deal. i thought i could and i was wrong, so she's going back to her breeder this afternoon.

i am heartbroken. she is the nicest, most outgoing, friendly puppy ever and she was going to be my flyball princess. she's a beautiful, amazing puppy and if i hadn't let mushroom eat her, she might be just fine.

but now she's drunk on seizure medication, her face hurts, and her brain is broken.

i hate this so much.

i feel like i've let her breeder down. i feel like such a jerk.

I'm so sorry. That really sucks, but it's better that you realize now that you can't handle it rather than later when you're both more attached.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

I hope that Folly recovers quickly. Poor little girl.

E - I can't imagine how much this must hurt. Lots of get well vibes for Folly, and some biiiiig hugs for you.

Maybe Mushroom sensed an on coming seizure and that's what triggered the attack? Still sucks but you aren't a fortune teller; might it be some solace to know that there are still triggers for seizures at this point? I know anesthesia can be a biggie.

Oh I'm so sorry.

I'm so so so so sorry. =< Please don't feel like a jerk. You took a leap of faith based on your heart and it sadly didn't work out. I'm sure her breeder will understand. Sometimes things just don't fall into place. I really wish they had.
I agree with Erin, I wonder if shroom didn't sense her seizures coming on. It could be the anesthesia didn't cause them, she was just... due.

That's what the e-vet said, too, that quite possibly it wasn't resource guarding and that he sensed she was going to seizure. But she didn't seizure when he attacked her, so I don't know.

I am just heartsick.

I am so sorry to hear that El, poor Folly, poor you. (((hugs))) and <<<vibes>>> all around. I really hope no one ever has a seizure here because I am sure that would trigger an attack.

Oh no, I so sorry elegy. Please don't beat yourself up. You went in with good intentions and unfortunately things didn't go like you expected... everybody misjudges things in life. This must be so tough. I'm sorry that you'll have to say goodbye to her, and that you feel so guilty and that she's hurting.

((((hugs)))) to you and (((((vibes)))) for a quick recovery for Folly.

I can't let her around Steve or Mushroom right now because she's dopey on medication and that freaks both of them out. It's awful. Seizures are awful.

***hugs***

This was my first thought, too, Erin.

((((((((HUGS))))))))) It hurts, but stop kicking yourself while you're down. You don't deserve it.

I'm so sorry.

Oh, I'm so sorry. My heart just dropped when I saw this topic - my heart really goes out to you. Please don't beat yourself up over it - you took a leap of faith and you tried your best, sometimes things just don't work out and I'm sure the breeder will understand. As hard and painful as it is now, sometimes when you look back on these things (and when you have your next kickass flyball dog) in the future, you can start to believe everything happened for a reason.

I'm so sorry it didn't work out.

Try not to beat yourself up. There was no way to know the issue she had previously would advance to this.

((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))

Oh, I'm so sorry. Please don't beat up on yourself. It wasn't your fault, just one of those crappy things.

Poor, poor Folly. I'm in tears, for both of you girls. Hugs and hugs and hugs.

I am SO sorry, elegy.

I'm also sure the breeder will understand, because you were worried about this exact scenario and she knew that was probably going to end up being a deal breaker. You're not horrible for knowing your dogs and your limits.

Oh god I am so so sorry! (((((((HUGS)))))

(((((((((((hugs))))))))))) I'm so sorry

I'm so sorry. Erin may be on to something, really. May I ask what issues she had as a baby puppy? *hugs*