Also thought I'd add I really hope in the next 15-20 I'll have my own piece of land with enough room for my mom to be there too. She's given all us kids so much that I'd love to be able to give her a place to retire. Be it we share the same big house or there be two houses on the property. That's my biggest dream. To have my little old lady mom safe and sound in retirement.
Where do you see yourself on 5-10 years?
- Thread starter HayleyMarie
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^^^ Very wise advice, bolded parts as well as the rest.
There's a saying ... if you want to make God laugh (or fate, or the Universe or whatever you believe in), make a plan.
Oh I hear ya, girl. The stuff like that in my life has always been from the result of actions/indiscretions/ass-holery of *other* people. I like to think that if somebody screws up themselves, at least they can learn from it. But when something happens to you because somebody *else* is an a-hole, and it has little or nothing to do with *you* ... that's when things really suck. But wanting less is the Buddhist path, and it works: All life is suffering, the root of suffering is desire ("wants"), lessen desire and you lessen suffering.
There's a saying ... if you want to make God laugh (or fate, or the Universe or whatever you believe in), make a plan.
Oh I hear ya, girl. The stuff like that in my life has always been from the result of actions/indiscretions/ass-holery of *other* people. I like to think that if somebody screws up themselves, at least they can learn from it. But when something happens to you because somebody *else* is an a-hole, and it has little or nothing to do with *you* ... that's when things really suck. But wanting less is the Buddhist path, and it works: All life is suffering, the root of suffering is desire ("wants"), lessen desire and you lessen suffering.
I really don't know. At all.
I'm kindof like Renee, just going where life takes me. Sometimes it takes me very frustrating places, sometimes it takes me wonderful places. There is a song by Natalie Imbruglia I've always liked. Its called "Intuition".
A piece of the lyrics:
All I can say
Is intuition tells me, how to live my day
Intuition tells me, when to walk away
Could have turn left
Could have turned right
But I ended up here Bang
In the middle of real life
I'm kindof like Renee, just going where life takes me. Sometimes it takes me very frustrating places, sometimes it takes me wonderful places. There is a song by Natalie Imbruglia I've always liked. Its called "Intuition".
A piece of the lyrics:
All I can say
Is intuition tells me, how to live my day
Intuition tells me, when to walk away
Could have turn left
Could have turned right
But I ended up here Bang
In the middle of real life
5 years (22 years old): Done with college and working with a good job. Active in some type of dog sport, and thinking about another dog maybe. Marriage in the thoughts.
10 years (27 years old): Married, own land, have a pack of dogs, competing regularly in trials, training dogs (not really sure about that one, we'll see), have a child, steady in terms of money. And hopefully very happy.
10 years (27 years old): Married, own land, have a pack of dogs, competing regularly in trials, training dogs (not really sure about that one, we'll see), have a child, steady in terms of money. And hopefully very happy.
Totally going off on a pre-coffee tangent here.
If the true Buddhist wants for nothing, then what's the point in living? If one does not strive towards goals of some sort, which are usually made because one desires something (new material things, a better education, etc) then one is merely existing. To me, that's the antithesis of life. Life should be about improvement, appreciation, striving for something better.
Now if it's centered more around "desire as coveting", then I can understand and appreciate that. Enjoy what you have, work for something more, be content with where you are in your life right now.
If the true Buddhist wants for nothing, then what's the point in living? If one does not strive towards goals of some sort, which are usually made because one desires something (new material things, a better education, etc) then one is merely existing. To me, that's the antithesis of life. Life should be about improvement, appreciation, striving for something better.
Now if it's centered more around "desire as coveting", then I can understand and appreciate that. Enjoy what you have, work for something more, be content with where you are in your life right now.
I believe, (and somebody correct me if I'm wrong, its been a while since my World Religions class), that you are supposed to spend your life finding true enlightenment, so that you can attain Nirvana. Hence the meditating, serving others, and the renouncing of material possessions practiced by Buddha. With Buddhists, life IS about improvement, appreciation, and striving for something better. They try to improve themselves through meditation and self-denial, they appreciate life for what it is and what they have, not what they wish they could have, and they strive for something better, for that ultimate bliss, Nirvana.
I have never really understood planning out every little thing in advance... Life never works the way you want it to. So I have never been one to dream of the future. Marriage, kids, etc. Maybe its bad but none of that crosses my mind at all. I tend to live for the now. If in 5 years I am married then good for me. If it's still just me and the dogs, good for me too.
Never know what tomorrow's going to bring.
Never know what tomorrow's going to bring.
Never plan too far ahead ..... just be aware that glitches happen . I'm thinking family which includes our pets . I had a female pup whom was perfect to continue my line . Sadly Bambi was killed at 8 months . But then there's Nash ~ I never expected a Grandchild with Down Syndrome , but he's the light of my life .
I'd like to say, very tentatively, that I would like to have finished my degree in 5 years time. But I think I said the same thing 5 years ago...
Does anyone here feel that they are really slow in how they go about things? I have had no major upheavals in my life, yet I'm like a turtle.
And I'm kind of unconcerned about that... so I guess it's ok.
I don't generally make time-lined goals, because like the above example, they don't seem to work.
I have a vague dream of owning my own house, having a good job and trying to throw myself into the things I am passionate about (violin and dog training, history etc).
I am not really a career driven person, I want a good job. But I work to live, not the other way around. I don't want children.
I am really willing to let life take me where it wants me to go. We shall see.
Does anyone here feel that they are really slow in how they go about things? I have had no major upheavals in my life, yet I'm like a turtle.
And I'm kind of unconcerned about that... so I guess it's ok.
I don't generally make time-lined goals, because like the above example, they don't seem to work.
I have a vague dream of owning my own house, having a good job and trying to throw myself into the things I am passionate about (violin and dog training, history etc).
I am not really a career driven person, I want a good job. But I work to live, not the other way around. I don't want children.
I am really willing to let life take me where it wants me to go. We shall see.
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It's not at all the first statement, but closer to the bolded statement.
It is partly (but only partly) avoiding "desire as coveting" by as close as possible to a true understanding of the vast difference between a "want" and a "need" -- which sounds very simple in statement, but it must not be in practice ... and all the proof one needs is to really look around at what goes on in the world.
(But again, that's a very small part of it.)
Not to "correct" per se, because that's ^^^ on the Appian Way but it's not quite an arrival at Rome.
Buddhism is not at all about the extremes of ascetic self-denial, or even "self-denial" in the way that term is perceived in Western thought. That was Buddha pre-enlightenment, directly after having renounced all worldly possessions and for some time adopting a life of practicing extreme asceticism ... which he tried directly after having conversely practiced the extremes of luxurious indulgence that, at his time, happened merely as an accident of birth ... as a consequence of having been born into a ruling noble family. The first true step in Buddha's enlightenment was The Middle Path, i.e, the practice of NON-extremeism. Rather than re-phrasing, as a simple explanation it's this, in part:
"What two? Sensual indulgence which is low, vulgar, worldly, ignoble, and conducive to harm; and self-mortification, which is painful, ignoble, and conducive to harm. The middle path, understood by the Tathâgata, avoiding the extremes, gives vision and knowledge and leads to calm, realization, enlightenment."
That's not its entirety, just what applies to the particular discussion here. But that first realization led to the Four Noble Truths and then on to the Eightfold Path. But also as applies to the discussion here (or at least to Renee's post and my reply), it's also not about practicing merely as a reaction to past suffering ... because that is too much emphasis on connection to that which is past ... which then is merely a coping mechanism rather than anything close to the Four Noble Truths or Eightfold Path.
Sorry if that sounds convoluted ... but not sure how else to explain it. Perhaps an easier way to explain is: How much free rent in your head are you going to choose to give to past suffering, and/or those persons or events that caused it? (And that "free rent" ... or how much of it is there ...IS a choice. It's entirely possible to make another choice, unless someone convinces themselves they "just can't help it". Yes, they can ... the only "just' there is they're "just" choosing not to.) But again, this is VERY simplistic and still not what Buddhism is all about, not by a long shot.
Yes there are different approaches, different schools of thought. But that book is an excellent example of one woman's journey.
It is partly (but only partly) avoiding "desire as coveting" by as close as possible to a true understanding of the vast difference between a "want" and a "need" -- which sounds very simple in statement, but it must not be in practice ... and all the proof one needs is to really look around at what goes on in the world.
(But again, that's a very small part of it.)
Not to "correct" per se, because that's ^^^ on the Appian Way but it's not quite an arrival at Rome.
Buddhism is not at all about the extremes of ascetic self-denial, or even "self-denial" in the way that term is perceived in Western thought. That was Buddha pre-enlightenment, directly after having renounced all worldly possessions and for some time adopting a life of practicing extreme asceticism ... which he tried directly after having conversely practiced the extremes of luxurious indulgence that, at his time, happened merely as an accident of birth ... as a consequence of having been born into a ruling noble family. The first true step in Buddha's enlightenment was The Middle Path, i.e, the practice of NON-extremeism. Rather than re-phrasing, as a simple explanation it's this, in part:
"What two? Sensual indulgence which is low, vulgar, worldly, ignoble, and conducive to harm; and self-mortification, which is painful, ignoble, and conducive to harm. The middle path, understood by the Tathâgata, avoiding the extremes, gives vision and knowledge and leads to calm, realization, enlightenment."
That's not its entirety, just what applies to the particular discussion here. But that first realization led to the Four Noble Truths and then on to the Eightfold Path. But also as applies to the discussion here (or at least to Renee's post and my reply), it's also not about practicing merely as a reaction to past suffering ... because that is too much emphasis on connection to that which is past ... which then is merely a coping mechanism rather than anything close to the Four Noble Truths or Eightfold Path.
Sorry if that sounds convoluted ... but not sure how else to explain it. Perhaps an easier way to explain is: How much free rent in your head are you going to choose to give to past suffering, and/or those persons or events that caused it? (And that "free rent" ... or how much of it is there ...IS a choice. It's entirely possible to make another choice, unless someone convinces themselves they "just can't help it". Yes, they can ... the only "just' there is they're "just" choosing not to.) But again, this is VERY simplistic and still not what Buddhism is all about, not by a long shot.
There are several different schools of thought in Buddhism, though.
I got the clearest picture of Zen from that little book I'm always talking about Pure Heart, Enlightened Mind.
I got the clearest picture of Zen from that little book I'm always talking about
Pure Heart, Enlightened Mind.
We have to be comfortable with our inner selves and accept what comes our way . At 35 I had my dream life ... a husband I loved , 3 beautiful children , a lovely home on a remote 8 acres of woods with a stream and 2 wonderful Goldens ``` 30 years later our home and business were gone . Luckily, moving on , I have a roof over my head and Ollie . Widowed but have my kids and grandboys . Yes , dream , but if your bubble bursts be glad that you have the breath to blow another one .
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