The Venting Thread

*blackrose

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Well, that was fun.

My sister asked me why I treated her like she was a bad dog owner.

So I ****ing told her. Starting with the story of her two dogs outdoors in the cold winter in a feces filled kennel with no water and no straw in their dog houses.

Also included were the gems of having no money for ill vet visits, letting her intact in heat female wander over 2 miles to kill some chickens and kittens, letting feces sit uncleaned in her room, bringing animals home that mom and dad did not give permission for her to have, and me also having to take her two cats to the shelter after she kicked them outside with URIs and didn't medicate them because she "didn't have time".

I didn't even broach upon the blatant disrespect she shows my parents every.single.time she brings home yet ANOTHER animal and lets it destroy yet ANOTHER part of their house.

Oh, and didn't mention that she's never owned any animal, ever, for more than a year? And she's had....how many dogs and cats now? 10? Of each?

****. She's never going to talk to me again. I said it as politely and nicely as I could, but god dammit, it had to be said. I think I totally just made my sister hate me. Fantastic.
 

frostfell

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Well, that was fun.

My sister asked me why I treated her like she was a bad dog owner.

So I ****ing told her. Starting with the story of her two dogs outdoors in the cold winter in a feces filled kennel with no water and no straw in their dog houses.

Also included were the gems of having no money for ill vet visits, letting her intact in heat female wander over 2 miles to kill some chickens and kittens, letting feces sit uncleaned in her room, bringing animals home that mom and dad did not give permission for her to have, and me also having to take her two cats to the shelter after she kicked them outside with URIs and didn't medicate them because she "didn't have time".

I didn't even broach upon the blatant disrespect she shows my parents every.single.time she brings home yet ANOTHER animal and lets it destroy yet ANOTHER part of their house.

Oh, and didn't mention that she's never owned any animal, ever, for more than a year? And she's had....how many dogs and cats now? 10? Of each?

****. She's never going to talk to me again. I said it as politely and nicely as I could, but god dammit, it had to be said. I think I totally just made my sister hate me. Fantastic.
like you know, it needed to be said. sometimes neglecters dont even realize whats happening and need an outside voice pointing it out
 
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Thank you both for that!
I think maybe their judgement comes from the fact that neither of them have had an actual relationship, let alone a long distance one... but there really wasn't an excuse to act the way they did.
I have had this happen a few times with friends, who I no longer am friends with.

I also came to the same conclusion that part of it may be from jealousy or something about how they haven't had any significant relationships or relationships that were long distance.

These friends were overly dependent in general and afraid of being abandoned, and would take it out on people if they sensed they might be abandoned. Some of these friends, I seriously think meet criteria for a personality disorder, such as borderline personality disorder, however, I am not a clinician...yet.

I could go on and on about how it was difficult being friends with them when I was in relationships, but I won't. In the end, I am happy we have parted ways since, I do not need that drama in my life. With that being said, if any of them were to contact me for anything in the future I would still be there for them. I think that is the best I can do, and possibly something you may consider doing?
 

AgilityPup

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I just need somewhere to sort of vent, because I'm just the type of person who feels better after writing it all out.

Basically, I'm not the greatest friend when it comes to distributing my time between my friends and my boyfriend. My boyfriend and I get four months a year together so naturally I want to spend a lot of time with him. But what I didn't realize is that my friends were getting mad and upset over it, until today when one of my friends sent me a relatively long, harshly worded text about how I'm "burning the few bridges" I have left. Which honestly hit me hard because I didn't think I was that horrible... I'm always there for my friends and do make an effort to see them when I'm not working or spending time with my boyfriend. So apparently I just need to make a bigger effort which I'm going to try to do.
Worry about making YOU and your relationship happy. Your friends, if they are real, true friends, will understand that YOU need to be happy. And if spending all of the time you can with him is what makes you happy, do it.
 
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Thank you both for that!

I was sharing the messages with my other friend group and they 100% agreed with what you both are saying. After some thought, I don't think I'll be talking to them until they come to me first with an apology... because I really did not deserve to be talked to like that, especially by friends. It just sucks in the sense that these two friends are the only ones who live in the area minus one who is busy a lot. But I'm planning a trip the weekend after this one to visit two of my friends at their new place, so that'll be super nice.

It's just nice to hear that I'm not being unreasonable for wanting to spend all this time with him. They referred to me as "overly dependent" and that it "sucks for me"... which I've never thought of it that way because he's my favourite person to spend time with but I'm also able to go do my own thing when he is having time with his friends. I think maybe their judgement comes from the fact that neither of them have had an actual relationship, let alone a long distance one... but there really wasn't an excuse to act the way they did.

I live with my husband, we spend all day chatting through work instant messaging, then we come home and spend all evening together. I'd still rather hang out with him than any of my work friends, and almost anyone else. I'm glad you are seeing what selfish people they are so you can move on with your life.
 

FG167

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Can't you just get like, a cat spray bottle and spray her each time she does that?

I mean, less harmful than elbowing her in the nose or something.
Seriously. It's not like a pat or something either. It's like she puts both hands on me and ALL OVER. "Yesterday he was hhheeerrrreeee and today he is heeerreeee" GAH! If she doesn't stop after the baby is born there will be problems.
 

eddieq

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Sometimes when others don't do their jobs properly, my job gets exponentially harder. This has been one of those times.

That is all :wall:
 

Picklepaige

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It'd be nice if people would actually listen. We had to euthanize a ton of kittens today at work because they all came down with calici. We tell people when they first come into the cat room to not stick their fingers in the bars of every cage, because if a cat has a disease then that will spread it, but they do it anyway.

I'm about to start bringing a ruler to work and wacking the hand of every person who does that.
 

amberdyan

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Well, that was fun.

My sister asked me why I treated her like she was a bad dog owner.

So I ****ing told her. Starting with the story of her two dogs outdoors in the cold winter in a feces filled kennel with no water and no straw in their dog houses.

Also included were the gems of having no money for ill vet visits, letting her intact in heat female wander over 2 miles to kill some chickens and kittens, letting feces sit uncleaned in her room, bringing animals home that mom and dad did not give permission for her to have, and me also having to take her two cats to the shelter after she kicked them outside with URIs and didn't medicate them because she "didn't have time".

I didn't even broach upon the blatant disrespect she shows my parents every.single.time she brings home yet ANOTHER animal and lets it destroy yet ANOTHER part of their house.

Oh, and didn't mention that she's never owned any animal, ever, for more than a year? And she's had....how many dogs and cats now? 10? Of each?

****. She's never going to talk to me again. I said it as politely and nicely as I could, but god dammit, it had to be said. I think I totally just made my sister hate me. Fantastic.
I did the same thing with my sister about a month ago. She's just now getting around to talking to me again, and she's just pretending it never happened. (She's 23 and has also had 4 cats, 3 dogs, 1 bird, 8 rats and 2 hamsters in the last 5 years). She usually would just take in random dogs, keep them for awhile and then dump them at the shelter pretending that was her plan all along, but this time she actually adopted a dog from the shelter, kept it for 10 months and then she was SUDDENLY horrifically allergic to him. The final straw was the first time she saw Hugo after she got rid of her dog, she loved all over him. I called him away and pointed out that she could never touch/pet him because she's allergic. So she can't stay at my house either. And she can never, EVER get another dog again. I probably could have been less passive aggressive about it but ****... I can't stand the way she's so flippant about it.
 

frostfell

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my own semi dog owner vent. my friend that i gave/co own Tori with just got out a bad relationship and into a good relationship with a guy whos got pit bulls. no problem there, pits are fantastic. except that shes so enamored of this guy and his shiny new dogs and all the shiny new gamedog toys that thats literally all shes done for the last two months. shes been at his house in another state, playing with his dogs, and completely ignoring her bullies including the puppies (which need critical socialization right now) and Tori. theyre at her house being cared for by the ex husband.

bitch, i did not give you my dog so you could stick her on a back burner the second something shiny and new comes along. i gave you MY dog because you were a better home for her than i was. and now shes right back to where she was when she was here with me in an apt where i worked full time, unworked, untrained, ignored. im not the sort to repo a dog but goddamn im considering it.
 

milos_mommy

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A friend of mine lost her baby today. She was due the same time as me, so around 23 weeks pregnant. The baby wasn't well, so they did know this was a possibility. I am very sad for her.
 

milos_mommy

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A woman at work has been having some trouble housebreaking her puppy. Even though she's crate training and says she's doing it (fairly) right. She said he goes outside, but then will pee on the floor shortly after coming inside.

This week, she came and in and told me "well his accidents are always when I'm yelling at my kid".

Her child is a right terror and I'm amazed she hasn't gotten her face bit off with the way she interacts with the dogs. The woman is sweet and she's trying, but dear god I'm not sure she should be responsible for raising multiple living creatures.

At least she realized this and said she'd try to crate the puppy or move him to another room when she's yelling at her kid :rolleyes:
 

Picklepaige

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Trying to gather up the courage to quit this job. I've felt depressed ever since I started. They just euthanized one of my favorite dogs because he was too high energy, even though they just did a big transport so they had plenty of open cages left. He was just a puppy, and super sweet, just verry exuberant and playful.

I've never quit a job before, and everytime I try to tell the manager I chicken out.
 

PWCorgi

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Trying to gather up the courage to quit this job. I've felt depressed ever since I started. They just euthanized one of my favorite dogs because he was too high energy, even though they just did a big transport so they had plenty of open cages left. He was just a puppy, and super sweet, just verry exuberant and playful.

I've never quit a job before, and everytime I try to tell the manager I chicken out.
I'm sorry, that really sucks :(

As for quitting, just take a big breath and do it. You will feel so, so relieved after you do it, I promise!
 

Michiyo-Fir

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Ahhh so frustrated!

Suddenly decided we might go away for a few days (June 30 to July 4th) since the bf got a few days off for Canada Day. My mom usually takes Nia but she's away that week too.

My suggestions to my mom:

1. Have a dog sitter from a reputable company or one of my friends come watch her at my mom's house. Nia's a pretty stressed out dog at new people's homes so I strongly prefer this option. Mom says absolutely not, not safe, no idea what kind of people they might bring into our house, things could get stolen....

2. Try to find a place to board Nia that doesn't have other dogs. For example, in someone's home and not a boarding facility/dog hotel. Mom says no, Nia's going to be too scared.


Her suggestions to me are incredibly irritating:

1. I change my plans to go somewhere close by (she suggested a few place I have either been or have absolutely no interest in)

2. Find a hotel that can have dogs and fly Nia there with me. So many things wrong with this suggestions....hard to find hotels accommodating dogs, hard to book tickets for dog, don't have certified dog carrier, also difficult to do many simple activities like even having dinner somewhere or visiting museums/sights because no dogs allowed. Plus, most hotels don't allow you to leave your dog in the hotel by themselves.

3. Don't go because mom booked her own trip far ahead of me so it's my responsibility to take care of Nia and not board her.

Sooooo frustrattteeeeddddd
 

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