Just wanted to clarify again I do not blame her , but i can see his side.
yah, i definitely see his side as well. I get why he did it. Just don't think it is right. He started playing the "im feeling so sorry for myself" card, so I ended up writing him this in an email:
"
I have been thinking about writing this email ever since you left Tuesday...still a little hesitant, but I think I just need to ensure some things are cleared up. I hope you understand that while some of these things may not exactly be the kindest words, I am writing this because I care about you & in hope that it will help you in the future. Even though it might not be want you want to read in the short term.
While I understand that things did not go the way you hoped, it is very hard to feel sorry for you in this situation. While (I believe) unintentional, you brought this upon yourself. You not only waited til I was emotionally involved - but you clearly were as well, therefore making it harder for you to deal with this end result. I suppose I could have asked, but I truly trusted that you were the type of person who would have shared such information. When I was in Seattle, my sister even asked if you had been married - I said 'no'...and even followed it up with 'well, i guess i never actually asked, but I'm sure he would have told me if he had been'. And it is THAT aspect...that you waited to tell me... that led to my decision to end things. It is NOT because you have children or were married.
It is tough to say what I would have responded had you told me after a 3rd or 4th date, especially since on Monday night, I really was willing to give it a try...until it dawned on me how upset I was about the fact that you not only waited to tell me...but that I'm not even sure if you would have told me then had I not directly asked about you having kids. If you recall...you still did not voluntarily share that information.
Anyways, I don't know what else to say...I really do not think you did any of this (and if I am wrong about this...don't correct me...that will really **** with my already ****ed up head) out of any sort of malicious intent. I think you are a really great guy & overwhelmingly have good qualities. I am usually the master of finding something wrong with people, and up until Monday...the only bad thing I could 'find' was just that you seemed 'guarded & hesitant' about something (ha). I guess I just want you to know that I don't think you are a bad person - I just think you made a big mistake here. And I'm hoping me being honest with you will help prevent you from making it again in the future."
He answered (won't include it), but it seemed to be a very sincere apology, which I really didn't feel like i had received up until then. So I just responded back saying that I appreciated it & forgave him.
Now I just hope it is closed.
The more I think about it, the more I think I would have given it a shot had he told me appropriately.