Breastfeeding in public
- Thread starter JacksonsMom
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Its not an intimate moment really. The first couple feedings when they are newborns, sure, those are but the rest, most are for food and then bonding happens from the closeness and the chemicals released, not because the two are in their own happy world staring at each other and blocking out the rest of the world.
Again, its ok to be uncomfortable but I would suggest one questions why and realizes that is their hang up. I admit, I am uncomfortable around teenagers (have no idea why lol but always have been, even as a child) and sadly, around very sick children....(maybe around too many growing up because of my little brother? I dont know but I really get anxious) But thats on me to get past and move through.
Again, its ok to be uncomfortable but I would suggest one questions why and realizes that is their hang up. I admit, I am uncomfortable around teenagers (have no idea why lol but always have been, even as a child) and sadly, around very sick children....(maybe around too many growing up because of my little brother? I dont know but I really get anxious) But thats on me to get past and move through.
Lol, ok, so while out with older children one should break up their play and make them go sit in a car to feed the baby instead of you just turning your head??? Seriously? Or a bathroom.....holy crap, the germs in there. Yes, sitting on a toilet feeding an infant while the toddler what, plays in the sanitary disposal container?
People are allowed to feel uncomfortable about whatever it is they feel uncomfortable about. Come off it. Just because YOU'RE comfortable with it, doesn't make it a comfortable thing to everyone else.
But everyone should be civil about it. Just because you can walk around the store breastfeeding doesn't make you super mom, or morally superior to people who don't, or won't or whom it makes uncomfortable. Just like someone can come in the store and breastfeed, I can walk right out of the store if it makes me uncomfortable.
Now, on the other hand, if you're working with someone who's pumping, ect, and you make it known that it makes you uncomfortable, and they continue to do it, that's grounds for sexual harassment. And that is what it is, but it's true. No one has to the power to continue making you uncomfortable at work like that. Like it or not, those are the rules in a working environment.
But everyone should be civil about it. Just because you can walk around the store breastfeeding doesn't make you super mom, or morally superior to people who don't, or won't or whom it makes uncomfortable. Just like someone can come in the store and breastfeed, I can walk right out of the store if it makes me uncomfortable.
Now, on the other hand, if you're working with someone who's pumping, ect, and you make it known that it makes you uncomfortable, and they continue to do it, that's grounds for sexual harassment. And that is what it is, but it's true. No one has to the power to continue making you uncomfortable at work like that. Like it or not, those are the rules in a working environment.
Yea I'm not down with relegating nursing mothers to the bathroom. Public bathrooms are icky.
ETA: I don't know if the work comments were directed at me, but I'll clarify just in case: My coworkers went to great lengths to ensure that no one was uncomfortable with them pumping at their desks. And they wear these huge granny aprons anyway, it's not like they just whip them out.
ETA: I don't know if the work comments were directed at me, but I'll clarify just in case: My coworkers went to great lengths to ensure that no one was uncomfortable with them pumping at their desks. And they wear these huge granny aprons anyway, it's not like they just whip them out.
actually fyi there are laws against that for pumping and breastfeeding in the work place. alot of people do not realize that.
What are they suppossed to do though if they are at work they HAVE to pump if they are breastfeeding. You have the option of going somewhere else since im sure they arent doing it in a common area. Maybe a break room but most women keep a pretty set schedule for pumping so you would know when they are in there.
What are they suppossed to do though if they are at work they HAVE to pump if they are breastfeeding. You have the option of going somewhere else since im sure they arent doing it in a common area. Maybe a break room but most women keep a pretty set schedule for pumping so you would know when they are in there.
Not from the majority of posters in this thread. There are a few however who are coming off like that. Soooo yeah.
I'm uncomfortable with a lot of things, like boobs.
I don't even like my boobs. I've got other issues though, so I generally feel like it's something I have to deal with instead of making a big issue of it in public. But that's really my hangup not anyone elses. I'm also uncomfortable around most people in general, so you should all stay home while I go out to shop.
I'm uncomfortable with a lot of things, like boobs.
I don't even like my boobs. I've got other issues though, so I generally feel like it's something I have to deal with instead of making a big issue of it in public. But that's really my hangup not anyone elses. I'm also uncomfortable around most people in general, so you should all stay home while I go out to shop. 
:hail: :hail: :hail: :hail: :hail:
I breastfed my son. I did my best to be discrete, largely based on my own personal comfort zone. Even then, I have been harassed by both sides of the coin. ("Gross! Why would you do that right here??" and "Why are you using a cover-up?? EVERYBODY SHOULD SEE THE BEAUTIFUL THING THAT YOU ARE DOING!")
Ultimately, I just think that neither extreme is doing anybody any favors. Especially those of us that only want to raise our children the best we know how.
Regarding the OP: I don't think you are out of line to be uncomfortable, and I also think that your response to her has been fair. In fact, I give you kudos that you came for advice in how one can respectfully address the situation. Hopefully, some of Romy's suggestions (and others, I forget who, sorry!) help both of you!
I breastfed my son. I did my best to be discrete, largely based on my own personal comfort zone. Even then, I have been harassed by both sides of the coin. ("Gross! Why would you do that right here??" and "Why are you using a cover-up?? EVERYBODY SHOULD SEE THE BEAUTIFUL THING THAT YOU ARE DOING!")
Ultimately, I just think that neither extreme is doing anybody any favors. Especially those of us that only want to raise our children the best we know how.
Regarding the OP: I don't think you are out of line to be uncomfortable, and I also think that your response to her has been fair. In fact, I give you kudos that you came for advice in how one can respectfully address the situation. Hopefully, some of Romy's suggestions (and others, I forget who, sorry!) help both of you!
THIS. COMPLETELY^^^
I think what's really irking me about this thread is that some of the pro-breastfeeding posts seem to have the general idea, "I don't think breastfeeding in public is wrong. People need to be more respectful of each other and their rights. So those who are uncomfortable with breastfeeding need to just get over themselves and deal with it."
I see absolutely nothing mutually respectful in that statement.
To me, mutual respect would be someone not complaining about a woman breastfeeding her infant in a department store. But, for her part, the mother would try to feed her infant in a more discreet location....say, one of the "waiting" benches they put for husbands near the dressing rooms....instead of dead center of the main entrance.
I think what's really irking me about this thread is that some of the pro-breastfeeding posts seem to have the general idea, "I don't think breastfeeding in public is wrong. People need to be more respectful of each other and their rights. So those who are uncomfortable with breastfeeding need to just get over themselves and deal with it."
I see absolutely nothing mutually respectful in that statement.
To me, mutual respect would be someone not complaining about a woman breastfeeding her infant in a department store. But, for her part, the mother would try to feed her infant in a more discreet location....say, one of the "waiting" benches they put for husbands near the dressing rooms....instead of dead center of the main entrance.
I do not think nursing mothers should ever be made to go out to their car or into a nasty bathroom.
Personally I am uncomfortable with it, but it is the mother's choice and right.
I have not really encountered alot of mothers doing it in public places, but the the few times I have they had covers on, which I thought was very respectful.
But like others said, just as a mother has a right to breastfeed in public I have the right to remove myself.
I have friends who breast fed their babies and I had no problems with it, i left the room and gave them privacy with their infant. It just wasn't a decision I made for myself and my kids, who are now way older
Personally I am uncomfortable with it, but it is the mother's choice and right.
I have not really encountered alot of mothers doing it in public places, but the the few times I have they had covers on, which I thought was very respectful.
But like others said, just as a mother has a right to breastfeed in public I have the right to remove myself.
I have friends who breast fed their babies and I had no problems with it, i left the room and gave them privacy with their infant. It just wasn't a decision I made for myself and my kids, who are now way older