Ive been quiet about this for too long....

yeah if Beezer were to be rehomed again... he would absolutely come undone. I am certain of that. He could NOT handle another home change. He came to us a wreck of a dog and even now over two years later he's much better but still walking on egg shells. He's almost lost his ability to trust and if he were to be rehomed AGAIN I think all hope would be lost for him. I believe that with my soul.

I won't mention any names but there was recently a situation where a person basically had to choose between losing his spouse or getting rid of the dog. it had just been getting worse and worse and worse and the dog just had to go. A friend took him in. The dog came completely unglued. He was a wreck. in the end... that dog couldn't be saved. he had to be put down.

Sometimes bad things happen. sometimes bad choices are made. but the world keeps turning and I know for me... I would rather move on than dwell on it and hold such anger and hatred for the rest of my life

My daughter has a co worker who is in an incredibly abusive relationship. This girl as serious problems. She goes on drinking binges and shows up at work, barely functional. For some reason they haven't fired her. Everyone tries to help, the company sent her to re-hab. No matter what anyone says about her being in this relationship and how she must get out or she may be killed.....that no, he doesn't love you etc, etc.....nothing changes. She's been offered help, support and she doesn't make use of it. Why? Because she doesn't have the stuff it's made of to take the help and get out of her prediciment. Should she just change her personality just like that? What went into making her this way? Well, my daughter knows. She was abused; raped and beaten for years by her father while her mother stood by and watched. When her mother was asked why, her reply was, "what was I suppose to do?" Now, any sane person with half a brain could see why this girl (a middle aged woman, actually) wouldn't have the stuff it's made of to go about fixing her situation.

I'm not saying that this is what Reggin had in her life....not at all. How do I know. That is just an example. But what I'm saying is that no one knows all the kazillion of variables that go into the make-up of an individual. What they have to work with may not be exactly what you have to work with in order to be able to function the same way or in a more logical way to your way of thinking.

The blame and rehashing and judging and jumping to conclusions about decisions that were made has got to STOP.

Third, I hope she isn't back with her abusive ex-boyfriend, for her safety and the safety of her kids. And for Reggin. He died so that she and the kids could get away, and I would like to think he wagged his tail on the Rainbow Bridge when he saw her escape.[/QUOTE]


I totally agree with you on this. I would not have wanted Reggin to die in vain.

I couldn't have said it any better myself. This is exactly how I feel.

And it will not stop until threads like this are not started. The OP needs to realize that wherever she is going to find closure on this issue, it won't be here. As can be plainly seen from the replies on this thread, this issue remains raw, and will for a long time.


If she is smart, and actually wants to enjoy this forum, she will just move on, and post about what she is doing now, and avoid the issue. As far as I can tell, forum members that have problems with her are simply avoiding her threads. This is clearly the best bet.

Nothing good will come of this. I don't know what she was thinking.

I don't know what she was thinking but my best guess is, she's still trying to get some validation and forgiveness by trying to explain better what she had to go on at the time. She is still obviously haunted by this and unable to forgive herself because she DOES care. Whether or not she can move on just yet is something she has to work on. This thread perhaps was a vessel to try to help heal her. I don't know. But until someone can reach acceptance, forgiveness and reach a positive outlook for the future, they can't move on. This thread was, in my best estimation a plea for help to assist in obtaining those necessary elements. And I think, as human beings who are NOT perfect, we should let bygones be bygones, stop looking back and concentrate on positive, productive forward movement. And that does not work if we constantly keep looking behind, no matter whether we're "right" or not.

This.

You have a very generous heart.

That's what my mother always says.



Drmom....you've posted about some very painful hardship you've been going through. Were there any decisions you made that contributed to your situation? Or was it all just on account of fate....the cards just fell where they fell?

Every second of every day, every single living organism with a thinking brain makes decisions. We decide to get on that train. We choose to step out in front of traffic and not look both ways (well, a mighty few hopefully). Someone might choose to say one kind word that may make it's mark on someone else. Or they might say one phrase that changes someone's life. Everything we do determines some consequence. We may not forsee what consequence at the time. Everything in all of our lives happens because of something else that happened before. And it's not all just left up to chance.

I know my own situation, with it's horrors and it's joys are the result of decisions...some good, some not so good. I don't know anyone or any living thing that makes consitently and exclusively good, smart decisions where the outcome is always favorable.

And furthermore.....(lol) I got caught up in that thread way back when and I said some very blunt things also. I felt frustrated and angry too at times. But the thing is....it was what it was and nothing we say or do can change the past. I can't change my past, my rotten decisions....what probably took years off my life due to extreme stress. But I'll be damned if I'll keep rehashing it. I made the necessary excuses and justifications for my decisions. I forgave myself for my stupidity and won't look back. I learned something from all that and now there's nowhere to go but up. And for that, I'm glad. I'm stronger and wiser. And I think my decisions will be so much better in the future. Instead of being wishy washy in certain contexts, I've become more confident. It's far reaching. And that is what I hope for Reggin so that she will love herself more and sufficiently to avoid a repeat of what she's been through with that creepy b.f....to avoid placing herself in such a position as to be unable to make better decisions which will land her in a happier place for herself and her children. And I'll say it again: If she keeps looking in the rear view mirror, she will crash and not go where she needs to go. And it's not helping one bit to be so critical at this late stage in the game.

Alright so I wasn't around when the incident happened, but I have been told about it, apparently many times. However, I read the first like, 7 or 8 pages of this thread and wanted to reply on some things said.

First, I just wanted to say, that when I heard what had happened to Reggin, I was hurt. No, I had never met Reggin, but I had seen pictures, heard stories, and quite frankly, if I heard of this happening to any other dog, it would be the same. It doesn't matter how you feel about it, move on. I know that for alot of you, this thread just brought up more hurt. If you dislike Reggin, don't read her threads, do not read her replies to threads, just get on with it. You do not have to reply or pay attention to people who you dislike... shocking to some, I know

As far as her coming to Chaz goes, I can honestly say that if something ever happened with my family, where we needed to rehome Rosey and/or Rascal, I would probably not come to Chaz to ask for help. As a complete last resort, possibly, although I guess I would never really know unless, god forbid, this situation came up. Yes, I have talked to people, made some good friends, however when it comes down to it, most of you are just people on the other side of the screen. I do not know you, the majority I have never met. Like, out of however many chazzers... I've met like what, 5? That being said, if it were to come down to it, I have some people who would probably take Rosey in, if not for good, then at least until I could find her a really good home. However, I also know that rehoming Rosey would NOT be a good idea, she gets very depressed when even just one of us leaves for a weekend -- I'd be afraid she'd go into a depression and starve herself to death. She would fall apart, it is just her personality, and I have to be strong enough to realize that, because when it comes down to it, I know Rosey personally, nobody else here does. Now, for Rascal is quite a bit easier. I have a friend or two I could ask, whom I know would, barring any personal emergencies, take him if seriously needed. If they couldn't, he would be going to the rescue society-- because I know what a great job they do at placing their ferrets, and how happy those that will never find forever homes are made until the end of their days.

I think that was mainly what I wanted to get out, just to reply to some of the replies.
As a side note,
NO, I do not have any human kids.
YES, I live with my parents.
YES, I am in college.
YES, my parents are the main caregiver for Rosey, as she is a family pet.
YES, my parents also pay for food for Rascal, while I am in school.
NO, I do not pay any bills, or need to make any of the "big" decisions.
However, if ANYTHING ever happened to either Rosey or Rascal, where they needed surgery or had a large vet bill, you can sure bet your ass that I would be there with my credit card in a heartbeat--no matter if I technically have the money at the moment or not.

Reggin -- i really do wish the best for you and your children, and hope that you are allowed to move on and not be haunted by mistakes in your past forever.

^this.

Charliedog... AllieMackie... Zoom....Acamp...I agree with everything y'all said. Y'all put it into better words than I could have.

A little snippet I borrowed from Allie's post, as I feel the same way:

However, I don't think I can forgive you, either.

I've not got much more to say on the subject, as I've said my piece on here before.

First, I would like to say that I am not upset over any of the replies in this thread. I ASSUMED that the some members who did not like me BEFORE the reggin thing happened, would still not like me. It just gives them more of a reason to hate me. Merico never liked me before. Island dog and scob never did. So its no surprise that they are still on the attack.

I said I made some mistakes. My children came first. People like sparks, who have children, can relate. No, I did not have a reliable source of internet. I had to walk 2 miles 8 months pregnant to get internet... in the freezing cold and pouring rain. Those from the northwest know what I mean. I can tell you this much, as soon as romy offered to be a transport I was down at that shelter to get him out... they were closed so I had to wait till the next day but it was too late.

I am done and over this drama. I said my piece because I havent said anything since it happened and it keeps coming up. That is all.

I know who my friends are here. And I've added a few members to my ignore list.

If something bad happens to my family or any of my pets, I can assure you that it wont be made publicly and I'd advise the rest to do the same. Lesson learned.

Carrie, I agree with you 100%. I also think she can now add starting this thread to her list of bad decisions. I hope this is the end of this on this forum. Fortunately this bad decision is just a small one compared with others.

Of course I make bad decisions, we all do. I try to torture myself with them and leave everyone else out of it. I don't always succeed, but I do try.

Chrys, I hope things go well from you from here on.

I do not think you can describe the replies on this thread as attacks, though. they were just responses to your original post, which you must have known would be inflammatory. Some people's feelings are just different than you would like them to be.

I don't know that this thread was a bad decision. Sometimes we have to take risks. (no pain, no gain) You never know if something that was said might have been of use, might have been a catalyst for some positive change. The decision to make this thread was a brave one....a sort of stepping out. And with some hurt, I'll bet something good and helpful was found in this 12 page thread. Sometimes Reggin, you have to take the good from the bad. It's all one big woven mess. LOL. It's like picking the good parts out of a salad and throwing the yucky stuff out. You just be strong and make the best from your past. Don't get bogged down with the yucky parts that don't seem to help you.

I hoped Reggin would do ok being put into another family, but now looking back it doesnt surprise me that he was found aggressive and lunging at people. He loved HIS family and that was it. Even if he was transported I doubt he would have done any better. He would have been miserable and I'm afraid someone would have been hurt. The LAST thing I wanted was for him to live a horrible life. Or for him to fall into the wrong hands.

Dont worry doberluv. I am taking in all that you have said. I AM picking the positive parts out. I've been here long enough to know which members posts to ignore and which ones I need to read.

I dont regret making this thread. It has helped me have some closure.

It's what I was thinking Reggin... so I'm not sure the outcome would have been different either way.

That's a good point. I see dogs all the time that I think would be better off pts. They don't know their future or fear death. They don't feel pain and they don't know. It doesn't hurt them to be pts. What might have been, what good life they might have had, what potential might have been....that's for us to agonize over. They certainly don't.