Ga!
I've kept my true emotions bottled up but my some ****ing idiot set them off.
I love my sister, I do but I can't stand seeing her anymore. I may have said simple things to mum, accidentally, not thinking that were NOT secrets, I had every right to tell mum. I would never share a secret. She threatens to tell mum the secrets I've told her. I only truly care about two of them, I'm tempted just to tell mum so my sister can't hold them over my head. I know mum will be pissed but she'll get over it. I want her to move out already! I hope August/September comes up and fast. I also hate her gf. Hate.
I love my brother but **** I wish he'd change his job. I want my life back. I want to have my nights back and my weekends. Baby sitting for 3 hours three nights a week sucks, baby sitting weekend mornings for 4-5 hours sucks when I want to sleep in. I can't do all the things I want to in the afternoons/weekends because I have to be home to watch the kids. Mum helps out but she works more then I do so I'd prefer her not to. I want him to stop leaving dirty nappies in the **** bath room. He's been pretty good with helping with cleaning at times but he needs to help more. I know he wants a life but he needs to consider the fact these kids are HIS, I didn't ask for kids but my life revolves around them. I hate I always have to work around them. This has been going on for over 6 months. I don't mind helping at times but I'm over it. I just wish things would change already, I wish I had it in me to say no. I do go to my dog training/meditation classes though which is nice. I do make sure I have some time to do things I want to.
My step-dad. I do love him but he needs to ****ing shut up! I don't mind him venting to me for a bit but he doesn't need to go on for the next 3 **** hours about the same thing! I'm sick of hearing him complaining about mum all the time. He says he loves her but he always whinges, he's so negative. Do me a favour and leave her! Won't be a big loss. Move to Kingscliffe, just **** off! I also hate when you rile the kids up, I like them quite so yes I'm going to be pissed off when you rile them up. Mums in a bad mood when she gets home because he puts her in one. Get the point I'm NOT interested so back off! Yeah, you've been good for months, that doesn't mean you can start up again. I hate feeling uneasy around you. I want to tell mum but I can't bring myself to doing that because its also my fault. You know I don't want you talking about that crap but you still feel the need to do it sometimes. I seriously want him to move out. I'm over him living here. I hate him for starting that crap up.
I'm not interested in sex. **** off. I do not like it, I will not have it with you. I can happily live without sex.
Also, I don't care if you don't believe in spiritual stuff like I do. I believe in it. I am not pushing my beliefs on to you so why must you try and prove your point around every corner?! I know people will always be like that but it's been annoying me lately.
I'm angry at myself for signing up with a gym that's a contract. I need to find the motivation to go or I'll be wasting my money. I need to stop being lazy.
I am a positive person and I always try to have a good out look but after last night, I'm a tad moody. I'll feel better later but I just needed to get this buried vent off my chest.