Have a problem... need some help

[mypy]

Here is my problem. We are renting a basement apartment form a very nice couple. The problem is thier fourteen year old son. He stealing thing form us. I could ignore the little stuff like my cd player and cds. He stole a $165 from us about a month ago.If I lock stuff up he just picks the locks as I found out last night. I caught him going through my son's piggy bank. I told his mom but nothing she tries works. Nothing bothers this kid. What can I do? We can't afford to move yet and I really like his mom.

 

[MafiaPrincess]

I'd get a good quality deadbolt and install it. And then, I'd tell the Mom that the next time something goes missing or your lock is picked that you are calling the cops.

 

[skyeboxer]

You are not doing the kid any favours by ignoring the fact that he's a sneaky little thief. What did you do when you caught him red-handed? Does the Dad know about his son's sticky-fingers?

I agree with MafiaPrincess tell the kid and the Mom and Dad that the next time anything goes missing you are calling the cops or he's working off the value by cleaning your toilet every day.

 

[bubbatd]

More has to be done. Stealing at 14 means much worse at 16 unless he gets help . His mother AND father have to step in !!! $165. is a lot of money ....how does he spend it ?????

 

[TopShelfPets]

inform his parents the value of whatever he takes isn't going to show up in your rent check. He steals your tv and you have to go spend $200 on a new one, your rent check is $200 short.

There's no reason for the kid to be doing this. There is nothing you need badly enough at 14 to steal from people living in your house. Stealing money from a little kids piggy bank is not the same as stealing milk to give your starving baby.

If you're paying rent and have signed a lease, you have a legal right to keep him out of your living space.

 

[Debi]

I'd be very, very upset. I agree to the suggestion of telling mom that you are going to start deducting from the rent. I also agree with getting a better lock installed...he's not THAT good. and I agree...all else fails, call the cops. it's great to like mom, but obviously she has no control of a child that is heading down the path to prison if someone doesn't step in soon. good luck!

 

[GlassOnion]

I would've just called the cops the first time. Stealing is stealing and he needs to face the consequences. The parents can correct him after he spends some time in juvenile (or whatever the punishment is for stealing at 14).

 

[Gustav]

(or whatever the punishment is for stealing at 14).

A clip round the ear, if you grew up in our house! LOL!

 

[FoxyWench]

id tell the "landlord" you want deadbolts instaling on all entrances to your area (doors to the outside AND inside of the main house) either you cover the cost or they do, eitherway you want good strong deadbolts AND only you have the key. (a kid this sneaky i wouldnt put past finding the spare key in their parents "secret" safe spot.

Id talk to the kids father, obviously mother is not a strong enough figure and maybe father can get something done. id agree wit the others in also telling the owner of the house (your landlord) that you will be keeping track of all items stolen and the value will be deducted from your rent check (its amazing how quickly a parent will take action when they know THEY are losing money because of their childs behaviour. you can also supply them with a list of items and their values upon paying each rent check so thye have an itemised list. Make sure you write a formal letter of complaint including the actions you want taking to fix this problem. keep a copy of said letter for your records (that way if things go sour you have documentation)

i would also make it VERY clear that next time you find the boy even trying to pick your locks the police will be called and a formal complaint will be made.

I do agree, if this is the kids behaviour at 14, its only going downhill from here if he keeps getting away with it.

 

[Julie]

Ahh this sounds so familar... Many years ago, I lived in a basement apartment and this same thing happened to me. The mother didn't seem to care her kids were in my apartment etc. There was a door inside that led to upstairs and I just used the space for a closet rack, and piled everything in front of the door.... the outside door had a deadbolt and a knob key, but the kids would get their parents keys from upstairs and then just come in and mess with my stuff.
So Everytime I left the house I pulled a long strand of hair from my head and taped it above the door and to the door so I could tell if anyone had opened the door. I used scotch tape and it was not noticeable. If the stand of hair was broken someone had been in there! I "caught" them many times from that hair even though nothing else seemed out of place. The parents never did know how I knew her kids were in my apt. Eventually we just changed the locks and didn't give them a key! I was sooo mad, Control your kids !!!

 

[Debi]

good idea to set up a video camera to catch the little bugger. nothing like proof.

 

[bubbatd]

What I don't understand is why the parents aren't concerned !!!!! My Lord, we turned our own son in for stealing a bike at same age . ( Yes, it was to the Chief of Police , who we knew , but it was to scare the bejibbers out of him! )

 

[Doberluv]

I agree with all the great advice. I wouldn't be thinking that stealing your CD player is something small or to be ignored. This kid is going to be BIG trouble if he is allowed to get away with this. I suspect he may be involved in drugs because that is most often what prompts stealing at this age. I would alert the parents to this and politely tell them, that although you like them, this will have to be reported and/or deducted from the rent. A video camera is a great idea. Keep written documentation as well as whatever proof you can get. Best wishes.

 

[mypy]

id tell the "landlord" you want deadbolts instaling on all entrances to your area (doors to the outside AND inside of the main house) either you cover the cost or they do, eitherway you want good strong deadbolts AND only you have the key. (a kid this sneaky i wouldnt put past finding the spare key in their parents "secret" safe spot.

Id talk to the kids father, obviously mother is not a strong enough figure and maybe father can get something done..

The problem with the deadbolt is we have no doors. I'm fixing up the basement. My landlords gave me three months free if I would fix it. As for the father thats where the problem started. The Father just got out of prision himself. The boy now thinks it would be cool to go. No matter what anyone says it doesn't bother him. That's why I don't know what to do. The problem has gotten worse too. The mom is now working two jobs and is never home to deal with him. He is stealing from people in the neighborhood, but those are all family that won't do anything about it. He got a part time job of his own. Maybe that will help. Hey you know that CD player I mentioned that he stole and broke? Well he paid me back for it with his very fisrt paycheck.

 

[Dreeza]

wow...that is a really crappy situation...especially since it is quite obvious the parents are useless.

I'm with the idea of calling the cops...i would let the son know next time ANYTHING is missing, the cops are going to be called...and the FOLLOW THROUGH with the threat.

At least he paid you back for the CD player...shows he at least feels a little guilty!! If dad was in prison though, something drastic does need to occur, or else the son is going to end up there too...i wouldnt worry about 'tainting' his record or anything.

 

[mypy]

He's no longer taking my stuff. Yippie!!! I found out why he paid for the Cd player though. He just wanted to use my cds and game system. I wouldn't let him and that caused some problems for a little bit. Last week he took something from his mom's room. When cornered about it he tried to blame my family. What he didn't know is we were with his mom at the time the thing went missing. His mom told him that if one more thing showed up missing she would call the cops herself. He must have believed her but I don't know for how long. Guess we'll see. Thanks for the help. I didn't have any idea what to do about him.

 

[Zoom]

Glad that got sorted out some!