i found when i did the kennel work that dogs tend to move their bowels about 20 minutes after they eat. Also there is nothing like a good hard long walk to get the bowels moving, My dear mary is proof of that much to my embarrasment, she doens't even stop just plods on down the road like a horse. You need to feed on a schedule and watch to see how long after she eats she has the urge to void. Keep her on a leash until you know for sure. I agree she isn't relating the act. Are you walking her in the morning before you leave for work? As to the excited during the walk, get the stop sit and stay down inside then take it outside. When she starts this nonsense put her in a sit. Little dogs can learn it too. By picking her up you are removing her from the stresser, but not teaching her to control herself. t-touch massage helps as well in the very beginning. Use it inside while learning to sit stay down, massage, calm...low voice, gentle praise. Then test it outside when there are no dogs around, walk 20 feet, stop command, sit, stay...massage. You may have to find an area where dogs aren't around but there is still distraction. hardware stores are pretty good about letting me go in..around the outside of shopping malls works too. You will be getting the message to her that you are in command and she is safe, and that you have expectations of her. you got to start with the basics indoors, then expand slowly outside. All dogs should know those commands down pat. If they do the dog will know that you are the boss and they will feel safer in their world and fact is they will be safer for they won't instigate trouble and they will look to you for permission before they act.. Right now she is the one controlling the situation.