Having a little bit of an issue and I wanted to post for some advice/feedback/encouragement or a nice kick in the you-know-where.
About 6ish mos ago, my Mom asked me what was my goal weight. I told her I didn't have a specific goal weight in pounds, but I would be happy if I got into a singe digit pants size
when I started last year, I was barely fitting into my 16s, I had to get two 18s to wear for work and I was seriously PO'd at myself for that!!
(In retrospect, she was asking because was starting to worry about me
)
Since then, I've lost more weight...
today I finally broke down and went shopping for new clothes again (I've been , I got a couple of outfits. The jeans I got... fits me very nicely, not tight, comfortable.... 8s :banana: I was not braggy but I was happy, my friend who I was shopping with was very happy for me and got me to try on several things I would've NEVER tried on before we were laughing and having a good time.
One outfit she picked out for me was something I knew I'd probably never wear, one with a really short skirt and tights. I put them on with a brave face and we all had a good laugh. She really really liked it, went on and on about it, and then was shocked and devastated when I put them back. She asked my why, and I told her I was too fat to wear something like that, I want my legs to be skinnier before I wear something like that. I don't want to be one of "those girls" who wear clothes that they "shouldn't"
That's when I got the "eating disorder" talk
Then, later, my mom called me with almost the same "eating disorder" talk
(yes my "friend" outed me). But I've heard similar from my mom before - she got my dad to ask me if I was taking pills to lose weight several months ago (which I am NOT)
Now, of course I don't think I am being unrealistic at all. My best friend thinks this is all ridiculous, but she is also my weight loss buddy through all this
she told me that I could wear these clothes if I wanted to, or had better self image/self esteem, but supports me. I have a new exercise plan to implement this week, targeting the leg /thigh areas. And starting today, I am cutting out pop 100% as opposed to a treat a couple times a week. But unless I am with her, I am feeling very beat down and discouraged about the whole thing
to top it off, I had a touch of the stomach flu or something and couldn't keep anything solid down for two days, so they think I'm not eating and starving myself . LOL
Sorry... More of a vent than anything, it seems