Fran , I'm curious ..... did your twins count as one adoption or did you have to pay double ? You sure hit the lottery after waiting so long !
We had to pay $2000 more, that's it. Plus we're getting two tax credits instead of one, well, we would if we qualified for that much money but even in 5 years (the amount of years it can roll back), we won't use it all. Still, we're not paying taxes for 5 years
To reply to the other posts
- the correct term to put embryos in the uterus is 'transfer'. You don't implant them, although I think the technology is starting to be out there. Implantation is when they attach to the uterus and you get pregnant. So, usually, you transfer 2-3 embryos hoping that one will implant. Just so you know the correct terminology.
About the 'there are millions of kids needing a home', I agree with what was said on the other thread, if it's the case, why don't YOU just adopt them instead of having a biological child? And please, don't make adoption a charity case, I don't think any child wants to grow up with the thoughts that he should be grateful that he ended up in your home...
One of the reasons adoption is so expensive is that every little piece of paperwork costs a ton in this country. It costs $2000 to finalize, $2000 for the interstate paperwork to go through, another $2000 or more for an attorney to take care of the termination of parental rights etc... It just adds up. Even if you go through the state, the process is horrible. Yes, it's free, but sometimes it takes weeks just to hear back from your social worker... and the child might go back to his parents... Some people even prefer going through the private adoption route through an agency to avoid all the stupid paperwork and delays of the system. Whereas you can just get pregnant in one month and not have to worry about all that stuff...
Bottom line, unless you've been through the adoption process, you have no clue what it's like to have people go through your life and check every little thing to make sure you are suitable to be parents... So it's just too easy to say that people should adopt instead of trying fertility treatments... If we could have got pregnant just taking meds, it would have saved us $45k in the long run... And that's without mentioned the pregnancy part. I never wanted to be pregnant so it was easy for me, but why should only fertile women be allowed to experience it?
Dizzy, it's the same in France... and if you go through the state here it's the same, they match the parents do fit the kids' needs. I know in France the wait can be up to 5 years though, so it's totally unheard of to adopt. In the US one of the issues is that no matter what, a lot of judges will want the kids to be reunited with their parents, so it's hard to adopt them if you're in some specific counties. In most cases, the parents' rights are terminated, but it's not their choice. The advantage of private adoptions here is that the birthparents can really choose who their kids go to also, so you hear of a lot of open adoptions where they keep contact after the birth. And that's a GOOD thing for the birthparents. I can't imagine what it would be like if your kids ended up with people who have a way of life you don't agree with at all.
So, I see both sides of the story... I'd personal prefer a system where the state takes care of the kids when the rights are surrendered, but the birthparents still have a right to choose the adoptive parents, and it would be free to adopt for everyone... but where would the money come from? Higher taxes, no doubt... So far they make do with a tax credit ($12000 per child, that you can use for 5 years), but lots of families don't even pay that much in 5 years anyway so they don't benefit from it, so the state doesn't lose that much money out of it... In the end you're talking about the country where a doctor visit costs $200, and the process to be a resident $3000, so it's not really surprising that adoption is so expensive... but we really need to see reforms on all ends (don't get me started about adoptive parents paying birthparents expenses for months either).
