Ah, I envy all you people in love and/or lovingly married. I was deeply, deeply in love once, figured I had met Mr. Right and was just waiting for the day when he would propose and we could spend the rest of our life together. He gave me tingles just about any time he looked at me, I couldn't stand to be away from him and just being able to cuddle and smell his skin made for a perfect evening. We could communicate easily and shared the same viewpoints and outlooks on a lot of stuff.
We were together for almost 6 years and then broke up...we just grew apart and in different directions...he was starting to turn into the type who would settle for less instead of working that much harder to make his original plan work and I didn't want to settle myself. Part of me will always love him, but we'll never get back together. Maybe in time we'll able to be good friends, but right now I'm in the middle of a bunch of resentment towards him for various things.
Oddly enough, you all know the show "Malcolm in the Middle"? That's the type of marriage I want. It's crazy, it's got it's ups and downs and they fight like dogs sometimes, but when they stop to look at each other or something really big comes up, they stick together and remember that they really do love each other. Granted, yes, I know it's TV, but it's not a perfect TV family.
Well, that and my best friend from high school's marriage. Hers is still new (they've been married for about 3 years now) and they've already had to go through some huge things, of the variety that has torn other marriages apart. But he has been a solid rock for her and her for him and the love they feel for each other is just an almost tangible force. Those are two people who were meant for each other, as skeptical as I was at first. She had never even dated before and then a year or so after meeting this guy, they were engaged. But just seeing them together let you know that everything was going to be ok.
There's an early morning, haven't had coffee yet ramble for you.
