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It's been 6 years today since I had to release my Roxy (V AKC Pt'd VanLare's Fantasia CD ASCA CD TT TDI CGC HIC) from her body that had been ravaged by bone cancer.
It was the single hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I thought honestly that I might not live through the astonishing grief and guilt that followed her death.
Many of you who have recently lost dear ones may also be feeling that awful black empty grief. So today, I want to tell you I can smile when I think of her.
I still miss her, but she was such a wonderful dog and I was so lucky to have her for 11.5 years. She was not a great show dog, but she taught me so much and I met so many wonderful lifelong friends through her.
She lived for a ball of any sort. Never met a person she did not like. Loved to ride with me in the van more than almost anything. She so loved dog shows. She was just a toy freak, and if it would squeak, LOOK OUT!!!
She learned so fast that the photographer at dog shows always had toys. I could see her LOOKING FOR HIM the moment I took her in the building to a dog show. To her, he was THE TOY MAN. I was sunk if they were taking pictures anywhere near where I was trying to show her. Makes me giggle now to think of it.
She never forgot anyone who fed her a treat or played with her with a toy. When she was young I had her out a few times while I was learning with Bert Halsey, a professional handler in my area who shows a lot of Rottweilers. How he laughed over her, he just loved her. After he showed her a couple of times when she was 2ish, she NEVER forgot him. She would look for him anytime we went to a show, and was almost as bad over him as she was "the toy man".
She loved the water, oh how she loved the water. She would take a flying leap off any dock, shoreline, etc and hit the water swimming. She would stand on her hind legs in water that was too deep for her to stand on, and calmly wait for you to throw the ball. We spent many wonderful happy house on a lake in the eastern part of NC at my favorite aunt's house. She would swim until she was tired, and then come to me so I could hold her so she could rest. She would just completely relax and let me float her, or stand on her hind legs and let me hold her front up. When she was rested, she would take off again.
She trusted me absolutely, and slept on my bed every night. She was the joy and light of my life. I miss her still so very much, but now, as I said in the beginning, I can smile when I think of her. Oh it will be a special day when I meet her again.
RIP sweet girl. Or run yourself ragged chasing balls and swimming. One of these days I'll be there to throw the ball for you.
CD title, at NINE years old
Water dog
Loving the Boomer Ball (she is 10 here)
It was the single hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I thought honestly that I might not live through the astonishing grief and guilt that followed her death.
Many of you who have recently lost dear ones may also be feeling that awful black empty grief. So today, I want to tell you I can smile when I think of her.
I still miss her, but she was such a wonderful dog and I was so lucky to have her for 11.5 years. She was not a great show dog, but she taught me so much and I met so many wonderful lifelong friends through her.
She lived for a ball of any sort. Never met a person she did not like. Loved to ride with me in the van more than almost anything. She so loved dog shows. She was just a toy freak, and if it would squeak, LOOK OUT!!!
She learned so fast that the photographer at dog shows always had toys. I could see her LOOKING FOR HIM the moment I took her in the building to a dog show. To her, he was THE TOY MAN. I was sunk if they were taking pictures anywhere near where I was trying to show her. Makes me giggle now to think of it.
She never forgot anyone who fed her a treat or played with her with a toy. When she was young I had her out a few times while I was learning with Bert Halsey, a professional handler in my area who shows a lot of Rottweilers. How he laughed over her, he just loved her. After he showed her a couple of times when she was 2ish, she NEVER forgot him. She would look for him anytime we went to a show, and was almost as bad over him as she was "the toy man".
She loved the water, oh how she loved the water. She would take a flying leap off any dock, shoreline, etc and hit the water swimming. She would stand on her hind legs in water that was too deep for her to stand on, and calmly wait for you to throw the ball. We spent many wonderful happy house on a lake in the eastern part of NC at my favorite aunt's house. She would swim until she was tired, and then come to me so I could hold her so she could rest. She would just completely relax and let me float her, or stand on her hind legs and let me hold her front up. When she was rested, she would take off again.
She trusted me absolutely, and slept on my bed every night. She was the joy and light of my life. I miss her still so very much, but now, as I said in the beginning, I can smile when I think of her. Oh it will be a special day when I meet her again.
RIP sweet girl. Or run yourself ragged chasing balls and swimming. One of these days I'll be there to throw the ball for you.
CD title, at NINE years old
Water dog
Loving the Boomer Ball (she is 10 here)
