I was really a bit relieved to see this thread pop up, I went out on a limb and expressed my concerns in the other thread and I'm glad you are seeking help/realize there is a problem
Please, do what you need to do - but don't look for answers for why he's treating you like this - there really is no excuse.
but I've gotta agree with this.
Bipolar or no, reasons or no.. figuring out he is bipolar or EVEN him seeking treatment (which frankly, doesn't sound likely) isn't going to make him "better".. there is no miracle cure and I just feel like, having a reason doesn't make it OK for him to treat you this way and it doesn't make it wrong for you decide that enough is enough.
I am of the personal belief that..adhd, bipolar, taken over by aliens.. I don't care, there is no excuse for emotional abuse... Having a reason doesn't make it any easier or less hurtful and you are supposed to feel happy and cherished in a marriage. Especially with your anxiety to worry about, it's unhealthy :/
There are so many mediocre/unhappy/complicated things in life, love shouldn't be one of them.
You guys started off this marriage.. then he went away, then you were miserable, then you were unhappy when he came back, then how you feel now, the emotional abuse, the lack of sex life, the fighting.. I hate to say it but I feel like you were much happier before.
I understand that you love him but I just can't wrap my head around WHY. And maybe it's because I only know you and it's only one side but you deserve someone who is nice to you, and calls you beautiful every day, and wants to have sex and hold your hand and makes you feel comfortable and who would never even suggest getting rid of the dogs because he knows how much you love them and is loving and caring and kind and honest..
Call me naive but dammit Amber, you deserve to be somebody's Princess and I don't care what's wrong with him if he isn't doing that, it isn't your job to 'fix him' or 'save him' it's your job to enjoy your life.
I noticed you pulling away from the forum, your self esteem lowering, you seemed more anxious, bringing in new pets and really the only happiness we saw from the pets/the dogs... and dammit it just makes me mad!
I don't know what you should do or how you should make this decision.. but ((HUGS)) and know we are here for you.
Whatever you choose, I hope you find happiness.