My Step-dad was hitting Hershey!!!

Ok I don't even want to talk about how horrible this is and what a crappy situation. You already know that.

Some thoughts.
Why don't you try switching your approach completely. Treat your step-dad like his opinions count. Allow him to tell you how he thinks it can be done and then say that this is a good learning opportunity for you and you would like to try it your way. Ask him if he will help you and if you can approach him with some ideas. A lot of men/adults like to feel they have control over the situation and this will help him feel like he has control. In theory, it will also let him feel like he is doing something right by you. Annoying, eh? But if it works... Then be thoroughly prepared with a plan. I think your plan should include reconditioning for crate training. There have been some good posts on here about helping dogs readjust to crate training. I think that if you can make it a happy place for him it might work out all around. I'm not 100% confident he will accept it though SO I recommend you PM one of our more knowledgable members (dober, doc...) and have them work out a plan with you.

On a side note. There are many, many people I would like to smack on the head to get them to pay attention lol. But, it doesn't actually work. As rewarding as it is in the moment it actually works against you. It'll get you in trouble and you'll have less say it what happens. You won't appear responsible. And right now you need all the advantages you can get.

I hope that helps.

heh, I probably will PM one of them, sounds like a plan.

thats so sad if my dad did that my mom would get mad!

What does your Mom think? Have you talked it over with her? Again, if you get all emotional, panicky and intense, they won't be as apt to listen. I think it's a good idea to include your step Dad into Hershey's training. But I wonder, even if he does, when something comes up like Hershey stealing something, is he going to suddenly change personalities and not hit the dog? I have a feeling that this is a knee-jerk reaction of your step Dad. That may be all he knows. Does he hit you too when he's mad at you? But you could try.

You could start with feeding Hershey next to the crate. Whenever you feel like playing with him or giving him a toy, you could hang out by the crate. Toss a yummy treat in there while you're playing around and just leave the door open so he can get the treat and come back out. Turn the crate into his toy box and he can get a toy when he wants one right out of there. Leave the door open for now, for a week or two.

After that, have the crate in your room or where ever you hang out the most, where you do your computer or school work, talk on the phone...whatever. Sit next to it and put a Kong with peanut butter (most dogs' favorite) in there and coax him in with it, giving a cue word now, as he goes in. ("go to bed" or "crate." whatever you want) Close the door and just sit next to the crate in a chair. If he gets upset, don't let him out at that time. Wait for a quiet time to let him out. Just practice at first for short 3-5 minute sessions. Let him back out when he's quiet, again.....not when he's upset or whining. Practice that a few times a day....just 5 minutes.

When he's comfortable with that, add another 5 or 10 minutes. As long as he's happy and chewing his toy, stick in a little hunk of cheese or meat and praise him. If he is upset still, go back to a previous step and work there for a while.

Next, start hanging out on the other side of the room. You're still in the room, but not right next to him. Get him comfortable with that for a while, then go out of the room and come right back in. Do that for a day. Then go out and come back after 3 minutes, then 5 minutes, then 10 minutes...you get the picture. Remember not to let him out when he's throwing a fit and if he throws a fit, go back to a previous stage where he WAS comfortable and work up again gradually. Make sure there's fun and rewarding things to do in there.

He can even sleep in there next to your bed at night. You can change his mind about his crate if you go gradually, desensatizing him and never again associate punishment or a rotten time with the crate.

I love the crate idea. We've always had a crate handy in the house for one reason or another. Summer is almost 13 and just doesnt' need one but before Cleo died, at 9 years old we still couldn't leave her for long periods of time without us. She just never outgrew her puppy stage. Eventually Hershey will learn to love his crate and know it is his "room" associating it with all good.

You got great advice for your step-dad. I'm sorry that happened. Poor Hershey. Give loads of treats for all of us.

Hes scared of my step-dad now. I laugh at that, but its his own fault. (not one of my brothers or sister likes my step-dad, actually come to think of it, no one does!) I will take everyone's advice though. As much as I dislike him, I will. thank you for the advice everyone!