The Venting Thread

[Southpaw]

My cat is on a puking spree. He has IBD, this used to be "normal" for him, but... once he was diagnosed with it 2 years ago, he's been so well managed since then. I started giving him Dasuquin and it seemed like that's when he started puking more, so I stopped giving it to him (he was only on it for a week). And now he's been OFF it for a week and apparently this morning it was like a scene of out The Exorcist, VOMIT EVERYWHERE.

Not sure if he's just getting intolerant to this food - we're at the end of his 2nd(?) bag of it - or if he has something new going on. He's just such a jackass at the vet that I'd prefer to not bring him in. >_<

 

[Taqroy]

HER ANXIETY IS GIVING ME ANXIETY AND EVERY ONE IS TELLING ME TO JUST DEAL BECAUSE "SHE IS LIKE THAT" WHY??"????

I would ask your roommates why her feelings/needs are more important than yours.

If that doesn't work I think you're going to have to be more direct - "I'm studying right now and I can't focus if you're in the room with me. Seriously. Leave." Which will likely cause all kinds of stupid drama but if you draw your line and keep it she will eventually get it. Just like raising a puppy. :lol-sign:

When I was a freshman in college sharing a dorm my roommate had a friend that was ALWAYS in our room. And I kept quiet about it for a long time and then one day I freaked out - demanded that she get out and not come back for at least six hours and went all WHARGARBLEDY I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE. I don't recommend letting yourself get to that point. It was incredibly stressful.

 

[Whisper]

I've spent the past year trying to "open up" and be more in touch with my "feelings" and all those things.

This was a terrible idea.

And now it's proving incredibly difficult to get my defenses back up to where they used to be and I didn't have to deal with feelings or any of that bullsh*t. At least I'm back to the point where I can laugh as someone points out they feel I'm "going into a tailspin". Absolutely none of this matters. I can't stand me, why should anyone else feel differently? I'm boring, bored and treading the line of constant angsty anger. One of my friends went all therapist on me the other night and got me to spill my guts and they were sitting there going "oh, this is good, it's good to get all this out." No. No it's not. Now there's someone walking around knowing a lot of **** that I don't want anyone knowing and I can't undo that.

Do they make metaphysical weed killer? That's the mental picture I've got in my head--my little black heart with pesky little dandelion feelings poking through the cracks. Weed killer. Now.

Man, I could have written most of that.
(((((HUGS))))) Zoomers. You are the opposite of boring, you are witty and awesome and I always enjoy hearing what you have to say. You're an amazing person and you have to believe me because I'm always right.

 

[Taqroy]

I'm boring, bored and treading the line of constant angsty anger.

PSH. You may be bored and angry but you're definitely not boring. I <3 you and your tiny shriveled heart.

 

[Dogdragoness]

"Sorry--I'm busy! Catch you later!"

It's not mean; you are busy. :]

Some people don't take the hint with the polite approach ... She is a grown ass woman, tell her to eat some back bone soup (as mom says) I am very much a loner and I couldn't deal with this, I have an aunt like this and I don't put up with her behavior either.

You shouldn't have to put up with it from a friend, part of being a friend is respecting the other person and it doesn't sound like this person is respecting you, in fact IMO she is being very RUDE. So frankly I would snap her off.

 

[stardogs]

Fran, when she comes over next, hand her this:

(from http://romanjones.deviantart.com/art/How-to-Live-with-Introverts-291305760)

Then whenever she's being too much, tell her to get out of your hamster ball.

 

[Beanie]

No. No it's not. Now there's someone walking around knowing a lot of **** that I don't want anyone knowing and I can't undo that.

Oh boy do I know how you feel. I mean really. I'm down with the whole "I'm going to stop telling people how I feel because now they're just going to use it to get judgy and bitchy on me." Yeah, no more of this talking about how I feel thing.

 

[Laurelin]

Do not disturb sign?

:lol-sign:

I have no idea but that kind of person would drive me batty.

 

[Saeleofu]

OMG Fran I'd hang myself. I can't stand people like that AT ALL. I WORKED with someone like that. Ughhhhhh.

I'm busy squeezing my dog's anal glads?

Sorry, I have too many sex toys and too little time?

Sure, come over and we can go hide this body together?

 

[Xandra]

Once I was in my CLOSED BORING DINING ROOM (one of about 4 common areas in the house, and the most boring and uncomfortable), doing homework and she KNOCKED and peeped in I was like "Sorry, I'm really busy, trying to study"
and she said "Oh I won't bother you" and I actually LOUDLY sighed and put my HEADPHONES IN (universal sign for GO AWAY) and she came in anyway because she doesn't take regular social ques (mild annoyance, sighs of annoyance, shifting away from her, moving down the table, not talking to her, not looking at her, moving to a DIFFERENT ROOM WHEN SHE COMES IN)

THESE ARE CALLED SOCIAL CUES FOR GO AWAY

And what can I say to that? No she wasn't doing anything to bother me, EXCEPT HER PRESENCE! SHE HAS NO BOUNDARIES!

"haha you're not going to bother me, but I really need a place with NO distractions when I study otherwise I'm just totally unproductive lol, that's why I had to lock myself in literally the most boring room in the house " or

"haha it's not you, it's ME, when I study my notes need to be the most interesting thing in the room otherwise I get NOTHING done " or

"haha, woman I locked myself in the ****ing dining room to get away from you give me my ****ing space its my own goddamn home"

 

[GoingNowhere]

If that doesn't work I think you're going to have to be more direct - "I'm studying right now and I can't focus if you're in the room with me."

This. Direct but polite and make it about you, not her. But seriously, it sounds like she could use a dog. Maybe volunteer Merlin to play when she comes over uninvited when you're busy but feel like you can't kick her out? That is, if he's friendly and you're okay with him socializing.

 

[Kootenay]

Fran OMG that would drive me insane!

We have basically the "communal house" in our group of friends, and all the band practices happen here, tons of potlucks, people come over to smoke fish in the smoker or to use our shop for vehicle repairs, etc etc. I am a major introvert and sometimes I feel like I'm going to go insane when I can't have time alone in my OWN HOUSE! We don't even have roommates!! Why are there people here ALL THE TIME!!?

But then sometimes I like it.

That girl sounds totally off the wall though, I can't even imagine that.

 

[Zoom]

Oh boy do I know how you feel. I mean really. I'm down with the whole "I'm going to stop telling people how I feel because now they're just going to use it to get judgy and bitchy on me." Yeah, no more of this talking about how I feel thing.

Pretty sure he's not going to get bitchy on me about it, but still.

"You should go to therapy! You should go pay someone to listen to your first world white girl problems and know you're paying $125/hr to be silently judged!"

 

[noludoru]

Pretty sure he's not going to get bitchy on me about it, but still.

"You should go to therapy! You should go pay someone to listen to your first world white girl problems and know you're paying $125/hr to be silently judged!"

Or you could go to the one 10 minutes away from you off HR Pkwy and pay a $20 copay that can come out of pre-tax money if you get the hsa account. That'll cover five 1-hr visits, and if you really don't want therapy at that point, you didn't spend any extra money.

Neither of my therapists have been particularly judgey.

 

[yv0nne]

Yeah.. my psychiatrist wasn't really judgmental. He was super sweet& I expect a genuinely nice person invested in making other people feel better about themselves& their life circumstances!

 

[noludoru]

Yeah.. my psychiatrist wasn't really judgmental. He was super sweet& I expect a genuinely nice person invested in making other people feel better about themselves& their life circumstances!

I like to think no one who didn't genuinely care about solving problems and helping people would go to school for it and rack up hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt. There's always the exception (like the one who insisted that I'm a heroin addict and tried to have me permanently committed) but most of them are super awesome.

 

[LostAndConfused]

I like to think no one who didn't genuinely care about solving problems and helping people would go to school for it and rack up hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt. There's always the exception (like the one who insisted that I'm a heroin addict and tried to have me permanently committed) but most of them are super awesome.

.
.
.
.
were you a heroin addict?

 

[yv0nne]

That's probably true ..I was super shocked how nice it was to just talk to someone who wasn't invested in you the way friends/ family/ significant others are. It was refreshing!

 

[Xandra]

Yeah therapists do not judge because of first world white girl problems, they thrive on them. First world white girl problems are the raison d'etre of many many therapists.

 

[Fran101]

Yeah therapists do not judge because of first world white girl problems, they thrive on them. First world white girl problems are the raison d'etre of many many therapists.

Without first world white girl problems my therapist would be out of a job lol
and he is very non-judgey
When I was 16 my therapist very kindly helped me pick a dress for winter formal! lol he even worked with me on what color I should paint my nails.

They aren't there to judge..they are there to help.

Your feelings are valid because you feel them. No excuses necessary, first world or no.