The strangest thing you've said to your dog...

[SizzleDog]

I really can't think of anything... I talk to the dogs constantly!

I'm sure I look like a total wacko when I'm trying to get Ilsa to poo on-leash though... she's trained to eliminate by the count of 10 (or else se comes back inside and has to wait an hour before she can "try" again"... it was something I needed to implement when she'd ask to go outside as a puppy, just so she could chase lighning bugs...)

So here I am in the morning, in my pj's, with a Doberman sniffing for a place to poop while I'm semi-loudly calling, "Tennnn....... niiiinnnnneee... Hurry UP, Ilsa! Eighhhhttt.... sevennnnnnn.... sixxxxx...... fiiiiiiiiiiveeee.... your time is halfway up, get a MOVE ON!! fourrrrr.... threeeeeee..... twooooooooo..... onnnneee..... point-seven-fiiiiiiiveee.... ILSA, I'm on the decimals now, HURRY UP! ....point fiiiiiiive..... "

PS - usually she "goes" by "six" or so...

 

[Dreeza]

I cant really think of anything particularly funny...

i do tend to say "EXCUUUUUUSE ME??? Does my foot/arm LOOK like a chew toy to you????" quite a bit...

Sizzle, that is hilarious/genius!!! I wish Oakley was trained to do that!

 

[SizzleDog]

Dreeza - it's pretty easy to train, as long as Oakley isn't a dog that doesn't care if he pees/poos in the house. If you have a yard, take him out on a long line when it's time to pee (or better yet - poo!) - count to ten slowwwly, so he can hear you. If he doesn't poo in the time you give him, he goes back inside for an hour. Then, try again. If he poos in the time it takes for you to count to ten, praise like crazy!

Ilsa will start to get antsy when I reach six or five - she KNOWS her time is halfway gone, and that she'd better hurry if she wants to do her business!

 

[MafiaPrincess]

I just tell Cider go poopie. She goes on command, doesn't settle down and go fast enough we go in for an hour or more and then she gets another shot at it.

Backfired on us some when we dug up our foundation last summer. She was having issues with the yard being funny and wouldn't go though she had to.. Only indoor accidents we ever have had in years. Ended up having to extend her time for a while, but she's back on schedule. Ask twice, in like 20 seconds, and then it's inside...

 

[puppydog]

My poor dog gets bombarded with a range of things. I talk to her all the time and my gay house mate spends most of his time telling her she is so sexy and must come and cuddle with Uncle Phillip.

She generally just looks at us and rolls her eyes.

 

[dogstarsleddogs]

On the subject of poo's, my strangest thing said would have to be: "Ranger, you've got beautiful poops this morning!" He was having a bout of the runs, and he finally had some firm ones, and I was happy, lol.
I talk to my dogs like thier people all the time. Or reply them when they're "talking" to me. Like while feeding Nova: Oowooowoo "Yes, I know you're hungry, I'm hurrying" Ooowooowoowoo "Oh really? Are you that hungry?" Owoowoowoo

 

[Charliesmommy]

When I get home from work, as I go to check the answering machine, I always ask Charlie if anyone called today. As if he's going to say, uh, yeah mom, grandma called, I wrote down the number....

 

[bittervanityx]

I tell the dogs the oven is "hot" all the time, like you'd teach a toddler. Somehow.. they listen because they've never tried to go near it.

 

[96 GTS]

My aunt did teach her dog to "Pick up her toys." She carries a bucket around the yard, sets it down, puts a toy in it, then carries the bucket to the next toy, puts that in the bucket, and so on. She does this until she's picked up all her toys, hehe, so it is possible

 

[Rosefern]

I talk to my two like they're people all the time. I ask them how their day was when I get home, what I should have for dinner, etc.

-Rosefern

 

[PixieSticksandTricks]

I have a few. I always tell my two that the oven is hot. Its more like "No no no! The oven is hot it will burn you!". And they both always back away.

Now I now butt sniffing and licking is pretty normal for dogs. But Tucker ( not being neutered) is annoyingly obsessed with Maggie Mays backside. To the point where she will getting annoyed and bite him. So a constant in our house is "Tucker get out of her butt!!". And he listens!!!

Some times when im bored I look down at one of them and go "*sigh* are you as bored as I am?"

And before bed it always goes "No Maggie its not kisses time its time to lay down shut your eyes and go to sleep little girl". lol

 

[SharkyX]

I don't know if this counts as it wasn't something I said to the dog but more about what the dog was doing.

Princess left the room to go out to the kitchen
Jenn: Where's Princess?
Me: Oh she just went to get a glass of water

What I meant was drink of water but I slipped... and meant it to until Jenn started making fun of me for it and I realised what I'd said.

 

[SummerRiot]

LMAo and you haven't lived it down! LOL

 

[mrose_s]

i swear sophie just uderstand some things.

she can' jump into the back of the car unless we back it up a slope.
we were walking to the car one day and one of us said just casually"go on soph, take a running leap" and she did. she took off and jumped. didn't make it in but she tried.

just soemtimes she just undrerstands things uncanny. like full sentences and she goes and does it.

 

[bogolove]

LOL! That is great! I talk to Brady all the time on our walks, I mean actual conversations, and I bet anyone who has heard us thinks I am insane. But he always looks like he understands what I am talking about. Hee hee!

 

[Scooter]

"Zoe if you don't stop barking, I'm taking you home right now and I mean it!"

Said at the dog park when she was barking like crazy at a dog who wouldn't play with her! She ignored me completely, of course.