Parents..would you be mad?

Fran101

Resident fainting goat
Joined
Oct 12, 2008
Messages
12,546
Likes
0
Points
36
Location
Boston
#1
Ok so im just doing a little waitressing here part time for the summer, and im serving this family..all is well.
I bring them their food, etc..
Well when its time for them to leave, they all get up and then the mom turns to one of her kids, I guess he was like..4 and says "Go hug the nice lady and say thank you!"

before I know it, this kid is running towards me. He ate spaghetti and meatballs and needless to say, its all over his hands/face. as well as sweat (they ate outside) and all kinds of yucky kid stuff

I freak. I did NOT want this kid touching me

Im wearing my NEW cute white sun dress, and I just did NOT want this kid to make a mess of it. I put a lot of effort into wearing cute stuff to work and not getting food all over them

So..well.. Im not exactly proud of this. it was kind of a reflex

I used a menu as a stick and kinda put it between us so he couldn't get close to me

The kid runs into the menu and kinda stumbles backwards then starts CRYING and runs back to his parents. before I know it, the parents are yelling about how rude I am and making a fuss

I felt kind bad, the kid was crying but he was GROSS and the dress was really cute and I dunno
my manager said it was totally fine and I didn't HAVE to hug anybodys kids

Yes, the dress was white and really cute. but I know myself, and I know regardless of what I was wearing, I would've done it anyway.

I didn't HIT the kid with the menu or anything. He ran into it..

but really..is it so wrong? I dont like kids..I dont want to hug them. is it really that RUDE?
 

Taqroy

Active Member
Joined
Oct 7, 2009
Messages
5,566
Likes
0
Points
36
Location
Colorado
#2
Uh I think it's weird and rude that the mom wants her kid to hug random strangers. Probably it was a little rude back to face block the kid because it wasn't really his fault but I'd imagine she didn't give you a chance to say no thanks. I probably would've done it too.

ETA: Ok I just thought about this a little more and it kinda pisses me off. It's ok for her to tell her kid to go hug a total stranger and expect you to put up with it why??? That's ridiculous.
 

Xandra

Active Member
Joined
Mar 11, 2009
Messages
3,806
Likes
0
Points
36
#3
I say you're totally in the right.

Since when did it become wrong for kids to run into stuff and cry? NEVER. That is when.

Don't sweat it. The parent(s) are retarded anyways, and on several different levels. You're a waitress, not a napkin/stuffed animal combo.
 

Grab

Active Member
Joined
Jan 13, 2005
Messages
3,374
Likes
2
Points
36
#4
I have no children at this time, but I cannot imagine ever sending my kid to hug a stranger. But I am anti touchy-feely in general.
 

sparks19

I'd rather be at Disney
Joined
Jul 7, 2005
Messages
28,563
Likes
3
Points
38
Age
42
Location
Lancaster, PA
#5
well on one hand it's definitely odd and kinda rude for the parents to tell their kid to go hug a complete stranger. I would have told hannah to say thank you and goodbye but not to go HUG you. that's just... wierd

however, if my kid were running toward you and you put something down there for him to run into like that I think I would be a little pissed. of course my kid wouldn't be just running toward you like that but I would expect an adult to have better ways of handling that then sticking something between you like a stick knowing the kid is going to run into it. you could have side stepped or said STOP or something I would think. So... yeah I would have been mad about that... but then I'd never send my child running to you in the first place... that's just wierd
 

sparks19

I'd rather be at Disney
Joined
Jul 7, 2005
Messages
28,563
Likes
3
Points
38
Age
42
Location
Lancaster, PA
#6
I say you're totally in the right.

Since when did it become wrong for kids to run into stuff and cry? NEVER. That is when.

Don't sweat it. The parent(s) are retarded anyways, and on several different levels. You're a waitress, not a napkin/stuffed animal combo.
it's not wrong for a kid to run into stuff... they do it all the time.. .but for someone to PUT something there p urposely knowing the kid is going to run into it I do have an issue with that. that's like saying It's not wrong to stick your foot out and trip a kid because kids just trip all the time on their own.

As an adult you have the ability to find other ways to handle such things like... stepping out of the way.
 

Grab

Active Member
Joined
Jan 13, 2005
Messages
3,374
Likes
2
Points
36
#7
I don't think it was put there so the kid would run into it, I think it was meant as a blocker so a stranger's kid didn't get sauce all over clothing. Most of the 4 year olds I know usually have enough self awareness to stop running if they see something in front of them. And a menu isn't really a hard object. I'd imagine if she'd sidestepped, the kid would have kept coming with messy little hands.
 

sillysally

Obey the Toad.
Joined
Sep 20, 2008
Messages
5,074
Likes
0
Points
0
Location
A hole in the bottom of the sea.
#8
I'm not a parent but I worked at a place where there were tons of kids and never did I have a parent instruct them to hug me or any of the other employees--that's just weird IMHO. I did have lots of parents have their kids give me tips themselves, which I was totally cool with--lol.

If it were me, I likely would have just let the kid hug me (though I would think it's strange), but then again there is no way I would wear something the I didn't want food spilled on if I were a waitress (I know myself and I'm a klutz--lol).

I don't think you were out of line though--you should not have to hug anyone you don't want to.
 

ACooper

Moderator
Joined
Jan 7, 2007
Messages
27,772
Likes
1
Points
38
Location
IN
#9
well on one hand it's definitely odd and kinda rude for the parents to tell their kid to go hug a complete stranger. I would have told hannah to say thank you and goodbye but not to go HUG you. that's just... wierd

however, if my kid were running toward you and you put something down there for him to run into like that I think I would be a little pissed. of course my kid wouldn't be just running toward you like that but I would expect an adult to have better ways of handling that then sticking something between you like a stick knowing the kid is going to run into it. you could have side stepped or said STOP or something I would think. So... yeah I would have been mad about that... but then I'd never send my child running to you in the first place... that's just wierd
This x2.

To repeat, I would not and have NEVER told my kids to go hug ANYONE besides family members we were saying goodbye to, I think that part is odd and more than a bit weird.

But yes, you handled it a bit rough if you knew the kid was going to run into the menu. I most definitely would have put my hand up (in a stop sign type pose) and said WHOA! or STOP! if he had kept coming, you could've side stepped as sparks said. If the parents had looked at you funny for that, you could have said "Spaghetti and my new white dress won't mix well <insert chuckle here> " or something like that.

To sum up, the parents put you in a awkward situation and you didn't handle it very well. You both can accept a little of the blame IMO, LOL
 

sillysally

Obey the Toad.
Joined
Sep 20, 2008
Messages
5,074
Likes
0
Points
0
Location
A hole in the bottom of the sea.
#10
I don't think it was put there so the kid would run into it, I think it was meant as a blocker so a stranger's kid didn't get sauce all over clothing. Most of the 4 year olds I know usually have enough self awareness to stop running if they see something in front of them. And a menu isn't really a hard object. I'd imagine if she'd sidestepped, the kid would have kept coming with messy little hands.
Yeah, I kind of have an image of Fran using it as a shield of some sort.....
 

Pam111

New Member
Joined
Sep 29, 2007
Messages
3,845
Likes
0
Points
0
#11
well on one hand it's definitely odd and kinda rude for the parents to tell their kid to go hug a complete stranger. I would have told hannah to say thank you and goodbye but not to go HUG you. that's just... wierd

however, if my kid were running toward you and you put something down there for him to run into like that I think I would be a little pissed. of course my kid wouldn't be just running toward you like that but I would expect an adult to have better ways of handling that then sticking something between you like a stick knowing the kid is going to run into it. you could have side stepped or said STOP or something I would think. So... yeah I would have been mad about that... but then I'd never send my child running to you in the first place... that's just wierd
Yep, this is pretty much how I feel about it, too
 

sparks19

I'd rather be at Disney
Joined
Jul 7, 2005
Messages
28,563
Likes
3
Points
38
Age
42
Location
Lancaster, PA
#12
I don't think it was put there so the kid would run into it, I think it was meant as a blocker so a stranger's kid didn't get sauce all over clothing. Most of the 4 year olds I know usually have enough self awareness to stop running if they see something in front of them. And a menu isn't really a hard object. I'd imagine if she'd sidestepped, the kid would have kept coming with messy little hands.
No it probably wasn't put there so he WOULD run into it... but it was put there knowing the kid was running at you and likely would run into it.

I don't know, some menus are book like with a cover and such and it's like just a piece of flimsy paper.

yes the kid likely would have kept coming at her but a side step would have given the opportunity to say STOP.

from the way the story is told it sounds like the kid didn't have enough awareness or not enough time to stop before hitting the menu.

the parents were absolutely wrong for telling their kid to just go hug someone they don't know... I'm sure their intentions were good but that doesn't excuse bad judgement. so yeah the parents were wrong... but I also think this particular reaction was wrong as well. it's a 4 year old... surely we can think of something other than putting something in the way knowing it's likely he's going to run into it.
 

GlassOnion

Thanks, and Gig 'em.
Joined
Oct 29, 2005
Messages
9,065
Likes
0
Points
0
Location
Tejas
#14
Side stepping probably would've been worse. Could've tripped him on accident or he might've run into something behind her.
 

Xandra

Active Member
Joined
Mar 11, 2009
Messages
3,806
Likes
0
Points
36
#15
it's not wrong for a kid to run into stuff... they do it all the time.. .but for someone to PUT something there p urposely knowing the kid is going to run into it I do have an issue with that. that's like saying It's not wrong to stick your foot out and trip a kid because kids just trip all the time on their own.

As an adult you have the ability to find other ways to handle such things like... stepping out of the way.
Injuring a kid purposely, yes that is a problem. But A) this wasn't really intentional (she was protecting her clothing, not acting maliciously toward the kid) and B) most importantly, it didn't hurt the kid. He isn't going to have skinned knees or anything, he bumped into a menu.

It was a reflex, and even if it wasn't? Sidestepping in a restaurant isn't always possible, might not have deterred the kid anyhow. She saved her dress and I don't see any real harm done.
 

sparks19

I'd rather be at Disney
Joined
Jul 7, 2005
Messages
28,563
Likes
3
Points
38
Age
42
Location
Lancaster, PA
#16
Injuring a kid purposely, yes that is a problem. But A) this wasn't really intentional (she was protecting her clothing, not acting maliciously toward the kid) and B) most importantly, it didn't hurt the kid. He isn't going to have skinned knees or anything, he bumped into a menu.

It was a reflex, and even if it wasn't? Sidestepping in a restaurant isn't always possible, might not have deterred the kid anyhow. She saved her dress and I don't see any real harm done.
if she wasn't able to side step surely she could have used her voice... and I'm certain her arms are probably longer than this childs arms... she could have reached out and stopped him that way... then she'd only have to wash her hands.

how do you know it didn't hurt the kid? he ran into it and cried. She said she put it out like a stick so it doesn't sound like it was flat against her... it was stuck out and he ran into it. maybe it hit him in the eye or the nose or something. how do you know it didn't hurt at the time. just because there wasn't a physical mark.

it was intentional... maybe not intended to hurt him but she put it there purposely to stop him.

the parents were wrong... but two wrongs don't make a right.

just as an adult surely you have other methods and putting something in the way where the child is likely going to run into it.

as a parent... I would be mad about that. but I wouldn't send my child running up to her in the first place but IF by some chance she did I would expect an adult to handle it better than sticking something in the kids face.
 
Joined
Aug 1, 2007
Messages
4,683
Likes
0
Points
0
Location
I like oranges, California.
#17
It's not like she smacked the kid with the menu.
Sure, the kid ran into the menu....it's a menu, I don't think the kid would be hurt by it or anything.
The only thing I could think of was maybe, when the parent was pissed off, try to say something like Coop said.

I don't know. I don't get why they would want the child to hug a complete stranger anyway...
 

Izzy's Valkyrie

Very Food Agressive
Joined
Dec 10, 2008
Messages
5,946
Likes
0
Points
36
Location
Washington DC
#18
I see the menu as self defense and Fran had every right to defend herself. The parents were a bit creepy and definitely socially inappropriate anyways so maybe the child will learn from experience that you don't go running into complete strangers.

That said, WHY would you wear a cute white dress to anywhere that serves saucey foods :p
 

GlassOnion

Thanks, and Gig 'em.
Joined
Oct 29, 2005
Messages
9,065
Likes
0
Points
0
Location
Tejas
#19
Sure, the kid ran into the menu....it's a menu, I don't think the kid would be hurt by it or anything.
Depends on the menu. As someone else said, some menus are pretty hefty and hurt when hit with (even if it's just your own force hitting it).



What kind of restaurant do you work at?
 

bubbatd

Moderator
Joined
Nov 28, 2004
Messages
64,812
Likes
1
Points
0
Age
90
#20
Nash was big about giving high fives to a good waiter ~ but his hands were always wiped off ,you did nothing wrong !
 

Members online

Top