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  #171  
Old 06-21-2014, 11:19 PM
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Oh, i'll get you
Bwahahaha
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  #172  
Old 06-22-2014, 05:54 PM
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Yep. People of varying levels of attractiveness do get treated differently. Some people are shallow, and they might go to greater lengths to be kind to an attractive person, or feel less hesitation when saying something unpleasant to someone they deem unattractive. This isn't much of a reflection on anything but the individual who would treat someone differently based on their appearance.

I lost a significant amount of weight and absolutely noticed a difference in the way I was treated. It could've been that I became much more conventionally attractive, so men who wanted to **** me started treating me nicely. It's possible. It's much more likely that it had something to do with the change in my own personality, the fact that when I felt stronger and healthier, I was more confident and was much more approachable because of it. People were probably always, for the most part, decent. I just never opened up any opportunity for them to initiate contact with me because I kept to myself, eyes down, absorbed in my service dog or my phone or ANYTHING but other people. I really feel like my negative experiences with people were due to my poor social skills and lack of approachability, not my looks.

I can't argue against the belief that attractive people have an advantage in life and have the sex appeal card to play if they need to manipulate others in order to move up in their career, find successful relationships, etc.. But there's nothing keeping anyone from any of that. I think financial status matters much more in "society" than appearance. Frankly, beauty can be bought if you're wealthy enough.
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  #173  
Old 06-23-2014, 09:36 PM
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Originally Posted by Lyzelle View Post
Okay, so, uh, my turn.

Part One: Am I treated different because I am "good looking"?

I'm downright gorgeous, in my opinion. I dress down (sweats and baggy t-shirt). I dress up. I dress skimpy. I dress conservatively. My daily work shoes are 3 inch wedges. Or sneakers. I wear a full face of make up. I wear no make up. I wear concealer and mascara. I have bright red, high-maintenance hair. And I let it look faded and washed out when I don't care for the upkeep. But regardless of all of that, I'm still good looking. I am still beautiful.

And I am absolutely treated differently. No questioning it. My co-workers, my employers, the people who interview me, my peers, my customers, people who look at my college record. Because I'm pretty. Not because I am intelligent. Not because I'm clever. And certainly not because I'm educated. I'm pretty, so why bother, right? I'm pretty = I am a bimbo.

Part Two:



Hah. Haha. I love that. I get told that a lot. "Real girls". I absolutely, to the bone, seethingly, venomously hate the term "real girl". I'm pretty. And I'm pretty **** real, without having to hide behind a million hate-filled excuses to prove how much better I am at being pretty.

"Real girls" don't wear a full face of make up. I don't have to hide behind a shield of "I don't wear makeup" to show it off.
"Real girls" are curvy. I don't have to gain 50lbs to be real or pretty.
"Real girls" dress classy. I don't have to wear a full-length skirt or sleeves to be classy.
"Real girls" are modest and deny being pretty at all.

So I am definitely treated differently. Woman on woman hate. And that definitely doesn't change with looks!

You know what a REAL WOMAN is? Someone who is a goddamn woman. That's it. I don't care if it is Carmen Electra or Carmen Carrera.

/feminist rant.

Pretty Girl Rock, anyone?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HtXOVKNazYU
You forgot "humble".
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  #174  
Old 06-23-2014, 10:03 PM
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Originally Posted by Miakoda View Post
You forgot "humble".
Ah, I see. Confidence is a bad thing now. Sad.
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  #175  
Old 06-23-2014, 11:00 PM
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Originally Posted by Miakoda View Post
You forgot "humble".
I'd rather be confident than humble. I have no problem with my looks, and I really don't feel I should. Nor anyone else. I would MUCH rather see everyone here saying "I think I am pretty" than the bickering. Whole lotta hate, even from you now. Not so much confidence or support. Whole root of the problem, IMO.
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  #176  
Old 06-23-2014, 11:39 PM
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See, if someone shows even a little pride in their looks, especially if they have lost weight recently or made themselves over (if that is the case than you go!) They are called shallow, and have sarcastic comments hurled at them?

Is it such a crime to be happy and proud of one's looks?
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  #177  
Old 06-23-2014, 11:41 PM
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Yeah, I have NO problem with others being happy and confident in their looks. We SHOULD be...I wish some would rub off on me

The only issue I have is when some people (generally speaking) assume their issues with others come because of their looks when often it is their personality.
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  #178  
Old 06-24-2014, 12:17 AM
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Well, the reality of it is that no one is going to come with a magic wand and offer me the option of changing my looks, getting rid of my mental issues or anything else ... so I figure I'd better get glad about who I am.
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  #179  
Old 06-24-2014, 12:21 AM
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Meh why do we even need to proclaim to be pretty? I mean, it's just a face after all. Two eyes, a nose, mouth and ears if you're lucky. We should value ourselves on other stuff than our skin and bone structure.

Why do I need to tell you I'm pretty (or not for that matter)? Why is it important to feel pretty? Or want to be pretty? Why do we need to make sure we tell people we happened to get straight genetics from our parents?? Ooooh my genes gave me more symmetry than you.

And while we are on the subject..... What's pretty in one culture is pretty **** ugly in another.

So are you just pretty to your culture? And don't forget fashion changes over time. Ever remember heroin chic? Or is it now all about the behind and curves???

Why do we places so much value on whether our mouths are the right shape? Or if our ears fit a certain size chart???

I know biology and the need to reproduce might drive a lot of what we find aesthetically pleasing, but you don't think the media has a lot to play in it??

Personally crying out "oooh I'm so pretty" could also mean "ooooh look I socially conform to a media portrayed image of beauty which has been created within my niche market culture" to me.

Oooooh look how confident I am because I have a straight nose! It's important. Right?? My nose will make me STRONG and SUCCESSFUL!

This isn't a dig, so much as a rambling from my mind.

I hate that we feel looks are ever remotely important. It's only important to like the look of the one you have to look at all the time, and even then it's not even that important when it comes down to it.

Being good looking when you're young (or what's perceived as in your culture) won't stop you being lonely and unhappy when you're all old and shrivelled.

Looks really aren't important unless your like 13 - 30... After that you start realising it's all a load of bollocks anyway. Or you feel so insecure about losing your only power (yay confident because my skin is smooth!!) you have plastic surgery.

Then you end up looking like Cher.
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  #180  
Old 06-24-2014, 12:24 AM
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Originally Posted by Dizzy View Post
Then you end up looking like Cher.
And nobody wants that.


ETA: For real. Nobody.


ETA2: A friend of mine posted this on FB today. I thought it was relevant to the interests of this thread, and along the lines of dizzy's thoughts.

http://nathanbiberdorf.wordpress.com...-is-beautiful/
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