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  #31  
Old 05-15-2013, 10:23 PM
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AgilityPup AgilityPup is offline
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I actually just recently went through this. I never mentioned it here, because I am still very sad to have him gone and miss him like crazy, but shortly before Christmas, I rehomed my boy Crash.

I had a bond with Crash, of sorts. But I was and am much more bonded to my girls. I enjoyed Crash and we would cuddle and hang out, but he wasn't really anyone's dog. He was stressed in our house because of how many dogs we have, and craved more attention then he could get in our house. We originally took him in as a foster and I think it was his bond to Psyche that made us keep him longer. She hadn't really played that much with another dog since I lost Bella, but they played.

We never actively sought out a home for him. Never. But when dad's coworker mentioned they'd lost their two BCs and were missing having a dog, they came and met Crash and he loved them right away. His wife and Crash took to each other immediately.

So do I think it's right? Yes. If you are rehoming the dog to a home that is clearly a better fit, Crash for example is an only dog now, has someone with him 24/7 and is spoiled rotten, walked everyday and such, then yes, it's not only okay, but FAIR to the dog. Crash is much happier now with his new owners. I know this.

Would I rehome a dog that I haven't really put effort into bonding with? No. Simi and I went through a stage at about 8 months old where she had NO desire to work with me and we just had no bond at all.. did I rehome her? Nope. Because I knew it was my fault.

Each situation is, of course, different. So this is something that I feel should be handled on a case by case situation.
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  #32  
Old 05-15-2013, 10:33 PM
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Quote:
And my Spring experience really showed me that I am not the type of person to take a dog on a whim without knowing a lot about it and that finding a good dog (and breeder) match for me is very important.
Same here. In the past I was not picky at all nor did I cared about the breed. I love all dogs so why not? Well, reality hit, I had a dog who I had very little bond with. Not that I didn't try, oh man, did I try. But we just didn't click( he had other, very serious issues, too). But my past dog showed little to no affection at all, preferred to sleep and do his own thing, and had little to no play drive at all. I was always envious when I saw dog owners playing with their dogs and I wish I had that bond. I feel the most connected with dogs who I can play and do activities with, and when I don't have that, part of that connection is gone. I am now VERY picky. I research breeds like crazy to find the right fit for me. I am definitely not the person who will take any dog home now.
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  #33  
Old 05-15-2013, 11:11 PM
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I don't have a bond with Rudy. We just have never clicked. Plus, he is more of my parent's dog. I wouldn't rehome him of all things.. he was abused before my parents brought him home so he has some sensitivity issues.

It would honestly break his heart to be rehomed from the only home he has ever known. With that said, I wouldn't rehome him. He might not be happiest with me since we don't share a bond, but I couldn't do that to him. If anything I can't take him, my brother will if anything were to happen to my parents.

Unless I was fostering, no I would never rehome a dog that I chose; neither would my family. I didn't choose Rudy and my parents really didn't have a choice.. it was they either took him or he would go to the shelter. And I think he would be passed from home to home if someone else took him. He's not mine and even though we don't have a bond.. I truly love him with all my heart.
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  #34  
Old 05-16-2013, 12:47 AM
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I'm very much "as long as the dog has a safe happy home to go to" re homing doesn't bother me. Dogs can tell when you're disappointed with them, why make anyone unhappy? That being said, I give all my dogs (what I think is) a fair shake. I bought Rage and wasn't sure I even liked her, but had wanted a pup out of that cross for over 2 years. So I said "dog, you have a year to show marked improvement." I adore Rage, and we have a bond that she (like a typical Plott...) doesn't care to have with anyone else.
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  #35  
Old 05-16-2013, 01:47 AM
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Prefacing my post with this.......I am extremely picky and set myself up for the best possible outcomes. I stick to breeds that I know a ton about, line wise and breed wise. I do my homework on the dogs and progeny produced, siblings etc.Once in a great while, my heart over rides my brain and I end up with a money pit from a BYB...enter LoLa.
However, even the money pits have good work ethic, poor health but good work ethic and good drive.

I personally will not own another dog that can not compete in sports. I do not have the time for just a pet dog here. If a new dog doesn't work out, then they will need to be returned to the breeder or sold. I do my research and put the effort in before the dog comes so if it doesn't work out despite good training and drive building, then it doesn't work out. I will not feel bad and I will not allow myself to be made to feel guilty for it. At the end of the day, the best choice needs to be made for the dog.

*One of the reasons I never sold Judge is because of the intense bond him and I have. I doubted it for a long time but we are bonded and despite the fact he would have been happier in a home with more experience and being worked more often, him and I are bonded closely. So, it would never have been fair to sell him cause it was never in his total best interest.
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  #36  
Old 05-16-2013, 05:03 AM
TahlzK TahlzK is offline
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I absolutely loved Frans post, sums up exactly what I was thinking!

I would re-home a dog if I didn't have a bond with him/her, if I'm going to be unhappy and hating having the dog around, I'm sure the do will pick up on that, why make us both miserable? Sometimes it is best to re-home a dog though I do feel bad for dogs that are constantly in and out of people's homes as soon as the dog is a problem/doesn't suit a need but again, the dog would be better off in a better home.

I see no problem with re-homing a dog if a dog doesn't suit your needs. I have done this once before though.

I do have a bond with Sunny, my Lab x but it isn't that strong of a bond. I enjoy his company, he gets his food/exercise/attention but I do feel he deserves more at times. Honestly, if I hadn't had him for so long and I didn't feel bad because of my family, I probably would find him a better suited home but he's here to stay. I truly hope the next dog I get though, I bond with well because I don't want another bond like I have with Sunny. I adore him though and I love having him around, he's a amazing dog.

I'm actually afraid to get another dog. While my brother pup was here, I thought I'd be head over heels with him but I was so glad when he left.. I don't understand why I didn't bond with a dog breed, a puppy, I have wanted for so long! I hope I feel a automatic connection with the next dog that comes in to my life.

The one dog I truly have a strong bond with is Serenity. I cannot explain how I feel about her, she is my world, I adore her so so much and I couldn't ask for a better dog. She has issues though and I hope they never get in the way of her living a full life. My worry is, will I be able to bond with my next dog as I have her? I don't even know what I want in my next dog, I'm hoping the right one just comes along. I just hope my next dog won't come along for a long while and I can enjoy her. I do hope my next dog will be a tad friendlier since it sucks I can't do my things with her due to her fear issues but she's worth keeping, despite me wishing I could have a tad more.
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  #37  
Old 05-16-2013, 08:40 AM
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AdrianneIsabel AdrianneIsabel is offline
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Bonds take work. They derive from happiness of accomplishments. Sometimes you need to reevaluate what you're aiming for and you'll find them. Often those hardships create the strongest bond, sometimes those hardships are too hard to overcome and resentment sets in. If a dog is not matching your goals and you've given it your best shot then rehoming is a normal step.

I am thankful, most days, I stuck it out with Backup. I had to learn to appreciate the tiniest goals, I had to learn to love him for what he was and I had to learn to truly work with him and not against him which is a constant battle. This is bond making and unfortunately this can take a lot of time.

Some people want a sport/work dog first and if the companionship part comes then its a bonus. I take no issue with that choice, I do sometimes worry some people give up too soon though.

I felt committed to Backup long before I felt bonded, and before that I couldn't stand him most of the time and thought about selling him, a lot.
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  #38  
Old 05-16-2013, 08:46 AM
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Haven't read the whole thread, but wanted to add my situation. Honestly I was getting frustrated there for a while because I didn't feel like Joey and I were really bonding.

Taking a tracking class with him and lure coursing practice with him has really taken us leaps and bounds and I'm finally starting to have that bond with him that I really wanted. I think just getting out and about and doing stuff with him (without the other two around) and finding stuff he really enjoys doing (tracking and coursing) really is what is helping our relationship.

Eta: another issue I had that I feel was halting us bonding was that I constantly caught myself comparing him to Cricket instead of loving him for who he is. He is loud. He is obnoxious. He is all over the place, but now that I've begun to see him more for who is is I've found myself starting to enjoy those qualities about him that drove me nuts before.
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  #39  
Old 05-16-2013, 09:12 AM
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I don't have a problem with people rehoming dogs for any reason, as long as they're responsible about it.

IMHO- if someone doesn't think they provide the home the dog needs and the dog is unhappy, I see no reason to prolong that.

There's only one dog that I couldn't establish a bond with that I've encountered and we were just a bad fit. She belonged to a roomie I had and she was over the top soft and very sensitive and she was not a fast learner. She never really trusted me and I got frustrated with her neediness and other bad habits.

Had she belonged to me, I would have definitely rehomed her. It wouldn't have been fair to either of us.

Cardigans are a good fit for me and I have no desire to ever have another breed of dog.
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  #40  
Old 05-16-2013, 09:18 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AdrianneIsabel View Post
Bonds take work. They derive from happiness of accomplishments. Sometimes you need to reevaluate what you're aiming for and you'll find them. Often those hardships create the strongest bond, sometimes those hardships are too hard to overcome and resentment sets in. If a dog is not matching your goals and you've given it your best shot then rehoming is a normal step.

I am thankful, most days, I stuck it out with Backup. I had to learn to appreciate the tiniest goals, I had to learn to love him for what he was and I had to learn to truly work with him and not against him which is a constant battle. This is bond making and unfortunately this can take a lot of time.

Some people want a sport/work dog first and if the companionship part comes then its a bonus. I take no issue with that choice, I do sometimes worry some people give up too soon though.

I felt committed to Backup long before I felt bonded, and before that I couldn't stand him most of the time and thought about selling him, a lot.
Yes, this. Well not about Backup for me, lol, but totally.

I am really not against responsible rehoming at all, but I do caution people that bonds can sometimes take work. It's nice and feels magical when they don't, but a bond that's hard fought and hard won is just as valuable as the dog that's "love at first sight."

It took a long time for Keeva and I to bond. As a puppy she was smart and driven and eager to learn, but really had no interest in me beyond what I could provide for her in food and toys. She actively resisted any kind of snuggling and never sought out petting. It wasn't fear; she was just so busy and independent that I annoyed her. As she's matured she's gotten much more handler-oriented and physically affectionate (lol she just came and curled up against my leg, like, "Are you telling lies on the internet about me again?"), better focused, etc.

It wasn't easy, but she is so worth it. Accepting the dog for who they are helps a ton, as Adrianne said, and learning to work with them instead of against them as well.

I really have nothing against rehoming when done in a conscientious manner, but I do urge people to really put some effort and time into their bond with the dog before doing so. People might be surprised what can change.
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