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  #21  
Old 10-28-2012, 02:12 PM
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CaliTerp07 CaliTerp07 is offline
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Originally Posted by yoko View Post
And if someone walks up with an infant we just say we don't have any infant appropriate candy and most of the time the parents are cool.
LOVE that line! I think I will use it this year.

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Originally Posted by darkchild16 View Post
See I say Thank You for Morgan and prompt Bev to remember and she says one of the two at least.
And that's HUGE. If the kids are little enough to have mom or dad come up to the door with them, I expect the parents to say thank you if their children are too shy/unable to do it themselves.

Kids are getting stuff for FREE from strangers. If there is no appreciation for it (from someone in the family), that's a huge problem.

If we have school Wednesday (big if with this darn hurricane), I'm going to hammer home to my 8th graders how nice everyone is being to them, and how the only thing they have to do to get free candy is say "Thank you". Hopefully it sticks with a few of them.
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  #22  
Old 10-28-2012, 02:17 PM
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CaliTerp07 CaliTerp07 is offline
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I guess my issue is, who decides what “acting grateful” looks like? If I see a kid out there having fun who maybe forgets the “thank you” because he’s too busy enjoying the moment, checking out the spooky decorations, who cares?! Its a kid. He’s having fun. Enjoy his enthusiasm and energy vicariously! So what that he didn’t say thank you?
Its not like we’re forced to participate in Halloween.
Don’t like how people act? Don’t participate. Problem solved.
But...what a teachable moment! Those are the kind of things teachers are constantly looking for! I absolutely understand that some kids are so focused on running to the next house they forget to say "Thank you", but where is the harm in saying, "You're welcome!" as they run off or saying, "What do you say when someone gives you free treats?" It's a life lesson to learn how to be grateful, even when running around like little hooligans.

Really though, I'm not talking about the 5 year olds (who should have mom or dad up with them saying thank you if they forget, anyway). I'm talking about the 13 year olds who turned up their nose at my candy and asked if they could have a soda out of my fridge instead. The 16 year olds who stole candy and ran off. The teenager who came back to my door 3 times demanding more candy ("I'm back! Give me another reese's!") before finally forcing me to turn out the light (despite the fact that it was only 8:00 and there were still lots of kids out who I would have liked to see.) I would have been grounded for life if I had done any of those things as a child--and I'd be absolutely mortified to find out my child had done any of those things. I find it hard to believe anyone would say, "It's the spirit of halloween--just go with it!" if it was their child.

We're in a new neighborhood this year. I'm hopeful that kids are more polite this time around.
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  #23  
Old 10-28-2012, 02:18 PM
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[QUOTE=yoko;2100865

And if someone walks up with an infant we just say we don't have any infant appropriate candy and most of the time the parents are cool.[/QUOTE]

Dont mean this snarky, but why do you get to decide what is appropriate? The parents are having fun, baby is likely enjoying the stimulation, why not just give a piece of candy??

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Originally Posted by Danefied View Post
I guess my issue is, who decides what “acting grateful” looks like? If I see a kid out there having fun who maybe forgets the “thank you” because he’s too busy enjoying the moment, checking out the spooky decorations, who cares?! Its a kid. He’s having fun. Enjoy his enthusiasm and energy vicariously! So what that he didn’t say thank you?
Its not like we’re forced to participate in Halloween.
Don’t like how people act? Don’t participate. Problem solved.
This!!!!
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  #24  
Old 10-28-2012, 02:18 PM
JessLough JessLough is offline
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Yep, your kid can't say thank you for whatever reason? Say it for them, as the parent. Show some appreciation - - your child is not entitled to the candy just because they exist. People don't HAVE to give them candy.

I've never had a problem with kids not saying please and/or Thank you.... Probably because I ask the child to say it, and if they can't, I've never had a parent get upset about it - - they just say "s/he's non-verbal/other language/whatever"

But yes, I am that butch that expects your kid to have manners if they can, and if you as a parent aren't going to teach them that, I will while they're getting free **** from me.
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  #25  
Old 10-28-2012, 02:21 PM
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Saying thanks doesnt mean they actually mean it btw. I would much rather a kid feel grateful even if they don't show it then just say thanks because its routine.
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  #26  
Old 10-28-2012, 02:21 PM
JessLough JessLough is offline
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Originally Posted by Greenmagick View Post
Dont mean this snarky, but why do you get to decide what is appropriate? The parents are having fun, baby is likely enjoying the stimulation, why not just give a piece of candy??



This!!!!
I won't give a 7 month old a chocolate bar for their parents to eat. Or if the parents are giving the 7month old chocolate, and I'm not going to condone that, it's not what I feel comfortable with. And hey, it's me candy. I can do that.
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  #27  
Old 10-28-2012, 02:23 PM
JessLough JessLough is offline
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Its been said if I don't like it, I don't have to participate.
Well, if you don't like your kids having to say please and thank you, you don't have to participate. It goes both ways.
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  #28  
Old 10-28-2012, 02:24 PM
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Originally Posted by CaliTerp07 View Post
LOVE that line! I think I will use it this year.



And that's HUGE. If the kids are little enough to have mom or dad come up to the door with them, I expect the parents to say thank you if their children are too shy/unable to do it themselves.

Kids are getting stuff for FREE from strangers. If there is no appreciation for it (from someone in the family), that's a huge problem.

If we have school Wednesday (big if with this darn hurricane), I'm going to hammer home to my 8th graders how nice everyone is being to them, and how the only thing they have to do to get free candy is say "Thank you". Hopefully it sticks with a few of them.
Except people get mad that *I* say it for him and dont prompt him without knowing our issues. I actually flew off the handle at one lady once Who told me we were just lazy for not working with him and Im just lazy for doing it for him. She caught me on a bad day and she found out. Which was not good at ALL because it stressed Morgan out and I ended up taking him to ice cream because I felt bad.
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  #29  
Old 10-28-2012, 02:26 PM
JessLough JessLough is offline
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Saying thanks doesnt mean they actually mean it btw. I would much rather a kid feel grateful even if they don't show it then just say thanks because its routine.
I don't care if they mean it or not. Its MANNERS. As far as I see if, don't have rude kids and you won't run into the problem with people expecting manners. (general you, not specifically anybody here)

eta: and as stated in my other posts, there are some exemptions, yes.
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  #30  
Old 10-28-2012, 02:27 PM
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Originally Posted by Greenmagick View Post
Dont mean this snarky, but why do you get to decide what is appropriate? The parents are having fun, baby is likely enjoying the stimulation, why not just give a piece of candy??

We give out full size king size candy bars. Excuse me for thinking that a candy bar that is almost as long as your baby isn't baby appropriate.

I get if you want to walk around and show off your baby. I get it be a proud parent.

But don't expect free things for yourself on a child's holiday.
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