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  #101  
Old 10-29-2012, 08:09 PM
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Baxter'smybaby Baxter'smybaby is offline
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I am well aware that adults can have the same issue--I'm living it from the parent end, pretty up close and personal. Halloween with kids with different abilities/needs was the OP--that's what I was responding to. I spend more time than you can ever know surrounded by people of all ages and all needs. I have worked with kids and adults, both professionally, personally, and as a volunteer. I get it Yoko.
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  #102  
Old 10-29-2012, 08:09 PM
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Maybe I missed it but where did anyone say they were rude to adults other than maybe those who freaked out or decided to take it upon themselves to parent someone elses kids?
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  #103  
Old 10-29-2012, 08:12 PM
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Originally Posted by yoko View Post
I find this thread kind of disheartening that people are so 'it's a kid get over it'. Adults can have the exact same issues.

Like I've said before not only is saying thank you polite, for someone like me it LETS ME KNOW that an interaction is over. I literally cannot tell when one is over. For most people someone walking off means it's over. For me I don't know if they are going to turn around and say something, is the parent going to say hi or thank you? if so should I even close the door yet because I don't want to cut someone off.

For you with kids who do have disabilities or communication issues I really hope that when they are adults people are nicer and more respectful to them than you are to the adults with some of the same problems right now while yours are kids.
Im married to someone with the issues and raising someone with the issues so I get it too. I try to end a conversation on a traditional ending but honestly between my husband, my AS child, my NT child and my infant sometimes I forget and I would hope others would understand.
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  #104  
Old 10-29-2012, 08:14 PM
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Originally Posted by sparks19 View Post
Maybe I missed it but where did anyone say they were rude to adults other than maybe those who freaked out or decided to take it upon themselves to parent someone elses kids?
They weren't rude as get into your face rude. But the general 'get over it they're kids' and 'if you hate when people aren't polite just don't do it.'

I personally like seeing most of the kids in my town and the costumes since most are home made. I'm pretty sure people on here would be offended if I said don't take your kids because certain parts of trick or treating upsets them the same goes for the person on the other side.
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  #105  
Old 10-29-2012, 08:16 PM
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They weren't rude as get into your face rude. But the general 'get over it they're kids' and 'if you hate when people aren't polite just don't do it.'

I personally like seeing most of the kids in my town and the costumes since most are home made. I'm pretty sure people on here would be offended if I said don't take your kids because certain parts of trick or treating upsets them the same goes for the person on the other side.
but most of us (im pretty sure all but ya know) said WE make a point in saying thank you if our child doesnt. Basically all we are saying is dont get bent out of shape if they adult says it and not the child.
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  #106  
Old 10-29-2012, 09:20 PM
Brattina88 Brattina88 is offline
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Originally Posted by Baxter'smybaby View Post
as a child care professional, and parent of a (now) adult with a significant disability, I find it interesting and disheartening. Always amazes me how people can so easily judge others--parenting neuro-typical children isn't easy. Parenting a child with special needs is challenging. Put parenting both groups of children together, try to meet the needs of all of them, and be one person doing it (even if you have a spouse--doesn't mean they can be there helping if they are working)--and especially on a day that is supposed to be FUN? Wow--Breeze--I learned early to use sign language with my daughter--even if she didn't understand it, people watching "got" that she had some different needs.
I hope you guys have a good halloween. I know my 20 year old has been asking for weeks to go out trick or treating--and she will.
You said it much better than I ever could...

It makes me very sad to see such a lack of tolerance in the human race. At the end of the day, we all bleed red. I like to believe lot of it is a lack of knowledge, because I hate to think that some people are just that stubborn and narrow minded

I am not going to pretend to know how it is to parent, because I am not yet a parent. But I can imagine how one would feel. This is not my first time, of course, but just this past summer I had a child on the spectrum in my summer program. While I was fully aware of some of his sensory sensitivities, its impossible to control what happens out in public. And the looks alone (I won't even touch on what was said to me) when he reacted, and it didnt matter that they were mild and easily managed, were enough to cut you down to the quick And he was very aware of what people were saying, what was going on, too. THAT makes me mad

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Originally Posted by darkchild16 View Post
This as well. You want kids to have manners treat them with manners. I say Please, Excuse me and everything to my children because they deserve to be shown the same respect others expect to be given.

Believe me you have no clue how nice that is to hear. Ive lost quite a few friends since Morgans dx because they dont want to deal with THAT kid. Yet they act jsut like him and have no excuse
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Originally Posted by darkchild16 View Post
but most of us (im pretty sure all but ya know) said WE make a point in saying thank you if our child doesnt. Basically all we are saying is dont get bent out of shape if they adult says it and not the child.

I agree with this so much - children learn from what they see, what is modeled to them. To stay on topic with the thread - what frustrates me about halloween, is never ever the children, usually its the adults - the ones that I know. Who sadly fall into that category of stubborn and narrow minded. And consequently, rude.

Breeze, I bet I'd love your kids Hey, actually I hope I get to mee them someday!
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  #107  
Old 10-29-2012, 09:29 PM
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Originally Posted by Brattina88 View Post
You said it much better than I ever could...

It makes me very sad to see such a lack of tolerance in the human race. At the end of the day, we all bleed red. I like to believe lot of it is a lack of knowledge, because I hate to think that some people are just that stubborn and narrow minded

I am not going to pretend to know how it is to parent, because I am not yet a parent. But I can imagine how one would feel. This is not my first time, of course, but just this past summer I had a child on the spectrum in my summer program. While I was fully aware of some of his sensory sensitivities, its impossible to control what happens out in public. And the looks alone (I won't even touch on what was said to me) when he reacted, and it didnt matter that they were mild and easily managed, were enough to cut you down to the quick And he was very aware of what people were saying, what was going on, too. THAT makes me mad





I agree with this so much - children learn from what they see, what is modeled to them. To stay on topic with the thread - what frustrates me about halloween, is never ever the children, usually its the adults - the ones that I know. Who sadly fall into that category of stubborn and narrow minded. And consequently, rude.

Breeze, I bet I'd love your kids Hey, actually I hope I get to mee them someday!
Well if you ever want to come see GA you can always come here. I love having people here that I dont have to worry how Morgan is going to react around them.
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  #108  
Old 10-29-2012, 09:54 PM
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Originally Posted by yoko View Post
I find this thread kind of disheartening that people are so 'it's a kid get over it'. Adults can have the exact same issues.

Like I've said before not only is saying thank you polite, for someone like me it LETS ME KNOW that an interaction is over. I literally cannot tell when one is over. For most people someone walking off means it's over. For me I don't know if they are going to turn around and say something, is the parent going to say hi or thank you? if so should I even close the door yet because I don't want to cut someone off.

For you with kids who do have disabilities or communication issues I really hope that when they are adults people are nicer and more respectful to them than you are to the adults with some of the same problems right now while yours are kids.
There is no perfect solution. One thing you might try, though, is when someone starts to walk away without saying anything, attempt to force a response by saying, "Have a good night!" or "Have a happy Halloween!" That puts YOU in control of the interaction, because it will typically elicit a response such as, "Thanks, you too!" That means the interaction is over, and it's safe to close the door. Employ a 5-second rule; If the person still doesn't respond, count out 5 seconds in your head, and close the door. All of those things are completely socially reasonable/appropriate.
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