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  #2841  
Old 04-25-2014, 07:57 AM
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Yes you can definitely extend the learning. The benefit I like the best is if she is really struggling with something... We don't have to move on until she's got it an we can really focus on what she is having difficulty with. That was a big one for me in school. There were things I really had difficulty with but they can't hold up the whole class for my difficulty but then they'd move on and I was totally overwhelmed. My mom tried tutors but by the time I was done school for the day, I was so upset and burned out that I was totally resistant to anymore school.
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  #2842  
Old 04-25-2014, 08:28 AM
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Changing the subject slightly.........

How did/will people transition to being a SAHM when they had kids? This is something I'd want to do, at least until the kid was about 4.... Here we can take a years maternity leave. We talk about this a fair bit... I think I'd take the leave, squirrel the cash, and not return to work. If that's possible.

How do you/will you organise finances? What if you need a hair cut or clothes or money for stuff?! Do you get an allowance or share accounts?!

What about a pension?!

The way my job is, I don't think it would be practical for me to commute and be gone so long... And I don't want to. If I have kids, I want to be a mummy
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  #2843  
Old 04-25-2014, 09:00 AM
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I definitely believe that any parent can dig deeper into learning and subjects no matter how their child is schooled. I went to normal school and my parents spent a lot of time on educating me outside the school system as well. I just really like the idea of having more time during the day to do that.

I was always bored in elementary school. I learned to read when I was 3 and in kindergarten we spent an entire week learning each letter. In 4th grade, I had to take 5th grade math and english classes and was still bored. If my mom had home schooled me, we could've upped the pace and made the materials more difficult.

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Originally Posted by Dizzy View Post
Changing the subject slightly.........

How did/will people transition to being a SAHM when they had kids? This is something I'd want to do, at least until the kid was about 4.... Here we can take a years maternity leave. We talk about this a fair bit... I think I'd take the leave, squirrel the cash, and not return to work. If that's possible.

How do you/will you organise finances? What if you need a hair cut or clothes or money for stuff?! Do you get an allowance or share accounts?!

What about a pension?!

The way my job is, I don't think it would be practical for me to commute and be gone so long... And I don't want to. If I have kids, I want to be a mummy
I've always wanted to be a SAHM, so I feel very blessed to be able to do so. We're lucky that my husband makes a good salary and can support the three of us.

We've planned eventually going to one income for the past 6 years. It's meant buying a house that can be afforded easily on one salary, buying cars that are reasonable, etc, etc. We never wanted a long term financial decision to affect my ability to stay home.

We have one checking account that we share, and we have a budget. A certain amount gets allocated to things right away (for instance, college fund, travel fund, emergency savings, IRAs, etc). The hardest thing for me will be having a set food budget. We normally eat out a ton (almost every day for lunch)but will no longer be able to do that once I'm home. We discuss any "big" purchase that will affect our budget.

Pensions are so rare in the USA that it's not a concern to me. Our plan has always been for me to stay home for however long I want to (whether it's for 10 years, 18 years, or forever) and we've just always figured we'd stay within our means on one income. Like I said, thankfully my husband makes a great salary and we don't have to cut too many corners for me to stay home. We just won't be able to spend the way we do now. We'll still be able to travel and keep our hobbies, but we will no longer be able to spend $20-30 a day on lunches out.
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  #2844  
Old 04-25-2014, 09:11 AM
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We are financially stable and have very few outgoings... I just think it would feel bizarre handing over financial control as I also earn a good wage in my job! I just have no idea what we'd need to consider at the time. My partner is very much "I'm not worried about it, we will just deal with it at the time" lol. I'm a bit more like, "but I need details!! I need to plan!".
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  #2845  
Old 04-25-2014, 11:08 AM
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I have to admit first off, a huge part of the appeal of having children was learning my DH was supportive of me being a SAHM...I hated working. So that colors my view a little bit as I never had the feelings of giving something up or any desire to work that I had to choose between staying at home or working etc.

Finances, we handle them the same as when I had a job. We share the account, big purchases by either are discussed, little every day stuff is just done, and it all goes conveniently online where we can look (we are both awful and budgeting so are NOT good examples in that regard) but basically, yeah, I am NOT ok with the idea of it being "his" money. Its not...its money he makes to support OUR family. Its our money.
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  #2846  
Old 04-25-2014, 11:56 AM
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Like Greenmagick, I never really enjoyed working lol. Being a SAHM was my ideal (although I do work two mornigs a week right now).

Financiay, it was easy
For us because we had gone such a long amount of time without being legally able to work due to immigration so we were used to one income and had it pretty well figured out

We have seperate accounts that are linked to the same main account if that makes sense. I'm not sure how to explain it lol. We have the main account that all the bills come out of and Brian uses for stuff he needs like gas for his truck and stuff, then linked to that account I have a checking account. My account is for groceries, my gas, and whatever i need to buy or do or admission to museums, etc. If I find I nee more I just let him know to make sure we don't go over budget. We have the seperate accounts for each of us because it helps us both to allot the funds separately and stay within budget and not accidently over draw the account. He takes care of the bills with his allotment and I take care of our personal needs like groceries and fun stuff with mine. It's not a his money vs my money... It's our money. But having the two separated helps us keep track

As for haircuts, clothes etc... Having the separate accounts helps us with that as well. After all my financial responsibilities I know what I have to work with for clothing, hair cut, etc and vice versa.
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  #2847  
Old 04-25-2014, 12:00 PM
Fran27 Fran27 is offline
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You can practice by living on one salary and putting everything you make in savings for a few months.

For us it's different I guess because I would never have made enough money to pay for daycare anyway, and my husband found a better paying job when the kids were 1, so it helped (well, except the part where we had to move). And I use swagbucks to pay for most of my entertainment (although I only make about $100 a month now, but it still helps).
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  #2848  
Old 04-25-2014, 12:03 PM
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Yes, the cost of daycare is a big part of it too. I worked in the dog industry before children lol, managing a local grooming and training salon (and boarding drop off/pick up point). The pay, well, yeah, it was not enough to make paying for daycare worth it.
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  #2849  
Old 04-25-2014, 12:40 PM
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It's funny I guess because I just don't get how working couples do it. I'm lucky my kids haven't been sick yet (except some pink eye last year, so they were out of preschool for one day), but still... Teacher conferences, holidays, vacations, half days, that would be a major pain in the butt. I don't think most people get enough vacation days for all those. Plus even after care ends at what, 5pm? My husband doesn't get home until 6pm so it would be on me.

At the same time it's pretty scary because I have no idea what I'll do with myself once they are big enough not to need me at home anymore. Heck even now it's seriously boring at times, but I keep busy (between housework and cooking and doing groceries and exercising and watching my tv shows I guess). But the idea of finding a job when I'm 50 with no experience is just, well, daunting, considering even 8 years ago it was really hard to find something (I only got two little jobs since I moved here 12 years ago). I just try not to dwell on it for now... but it's something to keep in mind if you want to stop working.
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  #2850  
Old 04-25-2014, 06:05 PM
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We can't do one income, so not an option here, at least not where we live now. Cost of living is not high, but educators are not paid well here. (not to mention, if my husband were the only one working and supplying such things, insurance for the three of us would be over $900 a month! As it is, mine is covered through my workplace and I pay for Clive's insurance as coverage is pretty similar but it's a little less, cost-wise)

Right now, my kiddo is in daycare, so we only have to deal with federal holiday closures. That said, because my husband is a teacher, he has those same holidays off. He gets more sick time than I do, so generally, if Clive is ill (thankfully not often) he stays home. But, we do try to alternate if we can.
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