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Old 10-21-2012, 07:08 PM
Fran27 Fran27 is offline
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Default What would you do?

I'm part of another forum (closed). Every year we do 'adopt a family' at Christmas to help the families that could use it... People nominate 3 families, and they can accept or decline, and people volunteer to adopt one of the kids.

I picked a girl. All the other moms selected posted pretty much right away what their kids like, what their size is, what clothes the kids can use... she didn't. I've bumped that thread probably 3 times now and it's been a month and she still hasn't posted. She did post that her kid is in size 8 but it's getting tight. The deadline is in 5 weeks now, and she's been posting all over the forum. She has a son too, so I guess I'm not the only one who's stuck.

I'm getting really annoyed. I've passed a ton of 20 or 30% coupons for clothes. Tomorrow's the last day for a 15-20% Toys'r Us coupon. At this rate I'm going to have to go to the stores to buy stuff full price at the last minute, especially if her kids are asking for specific stuff. So I'll have to get less. I gave myself a budget... It's really frustrating that the kid is going to be penalized because the mom didn't post that stuff in time. I got a couple shirts for dirt cheap from old navy while I was placing an order for my kids (in size 10-12), then the mom posted two days later, in another thread, that she can't find pants that fit her so she mostly lives in dresses. At least it was cheap so worst case I can keep them for Lisa in 6 years when she needs them, but man...

So, what would you do? Send the shirts anyway? Keep them? Keep pestering her? What if she posts a week before? The idea of having to go out shopping after Thanksgiving makes me cringe. I don't think I'll volunteer for this stuff next time unless people have already posted the list.
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  #2  
Old 10-21-2012, 07:16 PM
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Is there a forum moderator who could get an email address to contact her? I would contact whomever is in charge of the adopt-a-family thing and let them know that you've attempted multiple times to contact her and would like guidance.
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Old 10-21-2012, 07:19 PM
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Yeah I'd reach a forum moderator.

I like adopting kids from the angel tree but never do it online because of this :/ What you are doing is a great thing and for them to not thing about your personal budget as well is just kind of inconsiderate.
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Old 10-21-2012, 07:19 PM
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I'd send the shirts anyway. How old is the kid? Chances are if she's 8 or 9 and needs clothes badly enough to be nominated for adopt-a-family, she's not going to be too particularly about color or style or whatever. The size sounds like it will fit if a size 8 is getting too small. Maybe try to find some pants for her?

Can you PM the woman, or post a new thread?

It does seem weird that this woman is looking for charity at Christmas and then doesn't bother to make suggestions when asked...maybe she feels funny asking for specifics? IDK
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Old 10-21-2012, 07:21 PM
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Pretty much what Caliterp said. I am sorry. I can imagine how frustrating that is.
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Old 10-21-2012, 07:23 PM
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if shes posting in other threads and wont give you the basic info then I think I would drop them if possible.
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Old 10-21-2012, 07:25 PM
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I would ask a forum moderator to tell her to update what she wants with sizes or be you will be re-assigned to another family.
It's such a great idea..and the forum shouldn't condone people ruining it out of selfishness/laziness that make it hard for people to participate. Plus, those who appreciate and really need these kinds of things step up and are thankful.

Normally I would say maybe she's busy or something happened.. but if she's all over the forum, she obviously doesn't appreciate what you are trying to do so I think somebody who DOES should be the one that gets this gift.
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Old 10-21-2012, 07:28 PM
Fran27 Fran27 is offline
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It's a small forum... the moderator bumped the thread too. Ugh. I'll PM her directly if she hasn't answered soon...
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Old 10-21-2012, 07:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fran27 View Post
It's a small forum... the moderator bumped the thread too. Ugh. I'll PM her directly if she hasn't answered soon...
I would PM her tonight so you dont waste any more time.
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Old 10-21-2012, 07:40 PM
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If I had bumped the thread multiple times I would assume that she felt that her previous answer was adequate and just buy what my budget allowed. Maybe she thinks it's crass to post a long list of stuff her kid wants if it's coming from charity or she's embarrassed or something because I mean, she did answer, just not with a lot of specific stuff.

It's a bit annoying not to have more of a response, but it's charity... I would just work within my budget and with what little information I had and not really stress over it.
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