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  #8311  
Old 08-26-2013, 12:12 PM
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Dizzy Dizzy is offline
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I lived in a city that I liked, but even when I got a day off, the first thing I'd do was get in the car to drive somewhere green to walk bodhi.....

I don't think I get the most out of city living lol.

Now the nearest shops are a 20 mile round trip away, and there's no high street, just 2 small supermarkets and shops that sell odds and ends etc, usual small town stuff.

There's odd things I miss, like being able to go to the cinema now and then, or variety of deli type shops etc, but I'm not really a cafe goer, and I hate clothes shopping... I do most of my other shopping online anyway...

I don't like the fact there's no dog stuff round here! No trainers, no groups, no nothing!
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  #8312  
Old 08-26-2013, 12:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LostAndConfused View Post
Where in PA are you heading? You know that NY is between MA and PA.....just saying
To Hop Bottom! Totally do-able, just a bit of a tricky situation to figure out, they'll be gone at the national sheepdog finals with their dogs when I'd normally come to get the puppy.

But really, I have come here to vent that the payroll service decided to pay me $31.50 for 38 hours work. It's going to be called in and sorted, but good grief.
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  #8313  
Old 08-26-2013, 03:55 PM
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Beanie Beanie is offline
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My friends are not allowed to be grandparents.
That's too weird.

I mean I know my friend is older than me.
And his daughter is a fairly young mom.

But that ain't right.
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  #8314  
Old 08-26-2013, 05:57 PM
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Julee Julee is offline
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August is bleh.
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  #8315  
Old 08-26-2013, 06:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatCrazyGroomer View Post
How old is baby? The last part sounds like maybe there's some post partum depression involved.
The kid is about 1.5 years old.. can PPD last that long?

The swings in mood are just.. a lot. One minute she is little miss happy parent sunshine (She even has a blog about how much she loves parenting! People come to her for advice, it's a popular blog!) "my life is just where I want it to be right now, being a mom fulfills me"

and the next, it's meltdown mode. The kid is too much, her husband doesn't help, she hates that she quit herjob..



Quote:
Originally Posted by AllisonPitbullLvr View Post
Being a new mom is really really hard trying to figure out your new identity and your new role in a group of friends who you suddenly have little in common with.

My daughter is three months old and I'm constantly torn between hating the feeling that my only identity is now Everleigh's Mom and never going out with my girlfriends like I used to, and not being able to pry myself away from her. It's a hard thing to accept, even though she was planned and we wanted her, that your identity has seemingly changed over night.

So, I suspect that it's nothing to do with what you guys are doing or not doing and everything to do with her trying to figure stuff out.
She has plenty of mommy friends...
I just feel like this has gone on for almost 2 years and as long as you didn't personally know her (If you read her mommy blog, knew her on facebook etc..) you would think she is the happiest mom on earth

I'm just confused as to what to do..
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  #8316  
Old 08-26-2013, 06:14 PM
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Fran101 Fran101 is offline
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As for the city/country thing, it is totally personal. PROS/CONS to both, it all depends on what's important to you.

I don't notice the smell or noise lol honestly, at all. Unless it's REALLY BAD (like sitting next to a homeless guy during rushhour on the subway), honestly don't even notice a smell.
As for the noise? I can barely sleep without it. The city noise that bothers most people (cars, people talking, sirens), I find oddly comforting.

I like all the people the diversity and people of all kinds,creeds all over the place is one of my FAVORITE thing about the city.

There is so much to do! And you can do it at any time! haha Restaurants, bars, activities, doggy stores/daycare/training, laser tag arenas!

Only thing that bothers me is the cost of living expenses (my rent. ugh!) haha
I have a friend who pays less to rent her HUGE house than I pay for my studio LOL that hurts a little, but I wouldn't have it any other way I'd rather pay more and be happy lol

I'd be bored stiff in the country honestly.. if nothing else the city has gotten me used to constant over stimulation.
It would likely end in a meltdown like...

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE IS NOTHING OPEN?!?!? IT'S 11 OCLOCK! WHY IS IT SO QUIET?! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!"
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  #8317  
Old 08-26-2013, 06:22 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fran101 View Post
The kid is about 1.5 years old.. can PPD last that long?

The swings in mood are just.. a lot. One minute she is little miss happy parent sunshine (She even has a blog about how much she loves parenting! People come to her for advice, it's a popular blog!) "my life is just where I want it to be right now, being a mom fulfills me"

and the next, it's meltdown mode. The kid is too much, her husband doesn't help, she hates that she quit herjob..





She has plenty of mommy friends...
I just feel like this has gone on for almost 2 years and as long as you didn't personally know her (If you read her mommy blog, knew her on facebook etc..) you would think she is the happiest mom on earth

I'm just confused as to what to do..
I read that article you quoted and was like "HALLELUJIAH!"

It sounds like she can't figure out how to reconcile her "ideal" of what motherhood and raising kids should be and what the reality actually is. She's probably also really missing having her own life, adult time, etc and feels super guilty about thinking that way. I ran into A LOT of this when I was doing Passion Parties. There's this cognitive dissonance that modern moms are getting and it's a hard thing to work through. They're not sure how to maintain their own special identity now that they are wife AND mother. We're not taught how hold on to who we are; there is still that pervasive unspoken expectation of putting everyone else and their needs before any of ours. It's bullsh*t and the tides are changing, but slowly.

I would honestly suggest she go to a therapist, maybe one who specializes in families, so she has someone non-judgemental to vent to and maybe she can figure out WHY she's having such a hard time personally and discuss options. Maybe just having a professional tell her that she needs and deserves to take some time to herself will help her stand up for what she needs in order to be an effective wife and mother the rest of the time.
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  #8318  
Old 08-26-2013, 06:22 PM
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sparks19 sparks19 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fran101 View Post
The kid is about 1.5 years old.. can PPD last that long?

The swings in mood are just.. a lot. One minute she is little miss happy parent sunshine (She even has a blog about how much she loves parenting! People come to her for advice, it's a popular blog!) "my life is just where I want it to be right now, being a mom fulfills me"

and the next, it's meltdown mode. The kid is too much, her husband doesn't help, she hates that she quit herjob..





She has plenty of mommy friends...
I just feel like this has gone on for almost 2 years and as long as you didn't personally know her (If you read her mommy blog, knew her on facebook etc..) you would think she is the happiest mom on earth

I'm just confused as to what to do..
Sounds like depression to me while trying to maintain the socially acceptable "perfect mom" facade
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  #8319  
Old 08-26-2013, 06:37 PM
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*blackrose *blackrose is offline
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ZOMG. STRESS.

Not being able to pick up the phone and talk to your significant other is really not what I need right now. We had a brief phone call today and he said something in regards to seeing if he can get liberty for a few days after he graduates, and if he can, we can get married on paper then. He sounded fairly confident that it would be possible as long as his A-school doesn't start right away. And once A-school starts, he doesn't know how easy it is going to be for him to get us both to the same court house during his free time on a weekend. He was told the base he will be at is "3 hours away from civilization".

Now I have this huge ball of anxious stress sitting in my gut, because if he can get leave, I don't know if we should just go ahead and have a really quick spur of the moment ceremony and call it done, or if we should still stick to our original plan and have the ceremony after A-school, since we don't really know how that is going to work out, either, and we'll be needing to move during that time as well.

STRESS. STRESS STRESS STRESS STRESS.

And what is really killing me is that even if I were to write it down and ask him, I won't get a reply until next week at the EARLIEST. And that means I will have THREE WEEKS to plan something. THREE WEEKS.

Did I mention STRESS?!?!?!?!
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  #8320  
Old 08-26-2013, 06:45 PM
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FG167 FG167 is offline
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I have insane job stress.

I am very stressed about the wedding/money.

Limit's neuter incision looks terrible. I'm taking him back in tomorrow to get it looked at. How did they mess up a neuter?? Poor guy's scrotum is ANGRY.
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