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  #13891  
Old 08-08-2014, 03:00 PM
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Fran101 Fran101 is offline
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Originally Posted by Equinox View Post
This is going to be SUCH a petty, first world problem kind of vent, but I really need to get this out. So please don't read if you're going to judge me for the rest of my life, because I'm in a rough spot right now

Basically, tomorrow is my 21st birthday and I am simultaneously frustrated, angry, sad, stressed, and annoyed. I've been diagnosed (just a few weeks ago) with a life long condition that I have to work at every day to manage, and am at the hospital at least 3 days each week. I can't do any of the things that I was planning to do to celebrate my birthday, and even thinking about it exhausts me. There was one idea my family had that was amazing, but I checked and realized it was too expensive. Anything else is either out of the picture because of my health, or we don't have the time or money for it.

I feel ridiculously alone because there's no one I can really talk to, since everyone's answer is "well, what do you want me to do about it?" which isn't what I need to hear. I have been crying nonstop for the last couple of days, and I don't know if it's the stress or my meds or a combination of everything. It doesn't help that my sister keeps telling me how petty I am. My go to friend for when I want to take a break from my family is busy, with work and his on again/off again girlfriend (the latter of which is great, but I wish he were around more).

Oh, and I was really hoping my lens would sell on CL so I could finally buy a new Karma Collar for Trent, but that hasn't happened yet. Not even an e-mail. Ugh.
So many ((HUGS)) It's not a first world problem.
Trust me, being sick is stressful and birthdays are important. Combine the two and birthdays can also feel very lonely, like you can't do what you want to do, especially at an age like 21 where it seems like everyone is a picture of health.

The "well I can't fix your problem" people are annoying, but try to vocalize that they are helping by listening and being supportive, you aren't looking for answers.

You aren't being petty or whiny. Your problems and feelings are important and valid, just because you feel them, you don't need to convince anyone.

I had a birthday disaster one year that ended up with me and a few friends holed up in a hotel room in dresses watching movies and drinking because of a hurricane. Ended up as one of the most fun birthdays of my life...and all it costed was the room and a few bottles of pink champagne.
Slumber parties are always awesome in a pinch. Just sayin.
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  #13892  
Old 08-08-2014, 03:37 PM
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If you could just call and tell me you hired somebody else, that would be great.
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  #13893  
Old 08-08-2014, 03:51 PM
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Equinox Equinox is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fran101 View Post
So many ((HUGS)) It's not a first world problem.
Trust me, being sick is stressful and birthdays are important. Combine the two and birthdays can also feel very lonely, like you can't do what you want to do, especially at an age like 21 where it seems like everyone is a picture of health.

The "well I can't fix your problem" people are annoying, but try to vocalize that they are helping by listening and being supportive, you aren't looking for answers.

You aren't being petty or whiny. Your problems and feelings are important and valid, just because you feel them, you don't need to convince anyone.

I had a birthday disaster one year that ended up with me and a few friends holed up in a hotel room in dresses watching movies and drinking because of a hurricane. Ended up as one of the most fun birthdays of my life...and all it costed was the room and a few bottles of pink champagne.
Slumber parties are always awesome in a pinch. Just sayin.
Thanks so much Fran, I really appreciate it and that does make me feel better. You pretty much have this amazing quality where you always know what to say because you take any tangled up mess of feelings and turn them into kind words <3

I definitely understand that my friends and family are genuinely trying to find solutions for me - I've told them before that it's not really my intention when I'm down or venting, but that's just how they are. I really am grateful for them, it's just sometimes hard to remember that when I'm so stressed and irrationally irritated at once. It hasn't been easy for them either!

One big reason why I do keep feeling guilty and petty is because I know I have it easy, compared to others. Whenever I start feeling sorry for myself, or am on the verge of complaining, I remember that my little sister has cancer. I know other people's problems shouldn't diminish my own, and that sure, she's never cared about birthdays and I always have, but it still feels... selfish, I guess? I shouldn't, but I haven't been making much sense as of late

Slumber parties are a GREAT idea, and reminds me of how long it's been since I've had one. The bummer about my friends and me having a summer birthday is that everyone either lives in a different city/state, or they're on vacation in a different city/state/country. I did just make plans with one friend of mine to go to the Portland Beerfest though, so that should be fun. It's even pet friendly!

And thanks again, by the way
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  #13894  
Old 08-08-2014, 03:53 PM
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Someone ALWAYS has it worse. That someone else has it worse does not invalidate your feelings about your own situation. You have some stuff going on that you have every right to be stressed and sad about. It's not like you're wallowing around in your own emotional filth, you're just down about some down-worthy things. That's ok, and hopefully the people around you can dig it.
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  #13895  
Old 08-08-2014, 04:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Equinox View Post
This is going to be SUCH a petty, first world problem kind of vent, but I really need to get this out. So please don't read if you're going to judge me for the rest of my life, because I'm in a rough spot right now

Basically, tomorrow is my 21st birthday and I am simultaneously frustrated, angry, sad, stressed, and annoyed. I've been diagnosed (just a few weeks ago) with a life long condition that I have to work at every day to manage, and am at the hospital at least 3 days each week. I can't do any of the things that I was planning to do to celebrate my birthday, and even thinking about it exhausts me. There was one idea my family had that was amazing, but I checked and realized it was too expensive. Anything else is either out of the picture because of my health, or we don't have the time or money for it.

I feel ridiculously alone because there's no one I can really talk to, since everyone's answer is "well, what do you want me to do about it?" which isn't what I need to hear. I have been crying nonstop for the last couple of days, and I don't know if it's the stress or my meds or a combination of everything. It doesn't help that my sister keeps telling me how petty I am. My go to friend for when I want to take a break from my family is busy, with work and his on again/off again girlfriend (the latter of which is great, but I wish he were around more).

Oh, and I was really hoping my lens would sell on CL so I could finally buy a new Karma Collar for Trent, but that hasn't happened yet. Not even an e-mail. Ugh.
A lot (((((HUGS))))) to you. I'm so sorry you need to go though this. Oh,& you should have a PM sometime today.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sassafras View Post
Someone ALWAYS has it worse. That someone else has it worse does not invalidate your feelings about your own situation. You have some stuff going on that you have every right to be stressed and sad about. It's not like you're wallowing around in your own emotional filth, you're just down about some down-worthy things. That's ok, and hopefully the people around you can dig it.
This. All of this.
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  #13896  
Old 08-08-2014, 06:10 PM
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Red.Apricot Red.Apricot is offline
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Equinox, I have a genetic disease that limits my activity and I feel a lot of guilt and anger about it too. If you ever want to talk, or vent, I'm here.

Hugs and love.
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  #13897  
Old 08-08-2014, 08:19 PM
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Equinox try finding a support group. I know many who felt it was silly but after going they feel much better. Sending all kinds of thoughts to you!
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  #13898  
Old 08-09-2014, 02:59 AM
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Worked until almost 1am. So tired but so awake at the same time. I've been having a really hard time falling asleep lately.
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  #13899  
Old 08-09-2014, 04:25 AM
SaraB SaraB is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sassafras View Post
Someone ALWAYS has it worse. That someone else has it worse does not invalidate your feelings about your own situation. You have some stuff going on that you have every right to be stressed and sad about. It's not like you're wallowing around in your own emotional filth, you're just down about some down-worthy things. That's ok, and hopefully the people around you can dig it.
This. So much this.
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  #13900  
Old 08-09-2014, 04:35 AM
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Melle Melle is offline
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I'm trying to get my last hour of sleep because I have 8-hour straight days of standing during work this weekend and then I go and get woken up by Nina tensing and her head going up as there are 4 gunshot noises in the trees from the big property behind my family's house

Then our garage detector light came on, and somewhere before that Nina picked up on some creepy, low, rumble or something. Dad's hoping the light just came on because of a black cat he saw but it's super unsettling. We're in the suburbs, and yes some people have chickens and the foxes will get at them sometimes, but rarely and there wasn't any clue to show someone would have had a reason to shoot 4 times in the dark. Very creepy.

At least if I still lived in the inner city limits I'd know what the noise is through urban familiarity
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