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  #11  
Old 08-22-2012, 01:34 PM
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darkchild16 darkchild16 is offline
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Im sorry but if you regret your kids or the situation grow some balls. Your kid doesnt deserve to be shut in because you regret them. Kids pick up on that. You chose to have them deal with it. I NEVER wanted to be a mother. NEVER but I got pregnant and decided to be a parent. I faked it until it came to me. There have been alot of nights (not in the past 3 years tho) where I cried and asked myself WHY i chose the way I did but that quickly passed when I realized how much I would have missed out on. Now I cant imagine life without them (even when im functioning on 30-40 minutes of sleep)

Her kid HATES the stroller Fran. I just gave her a umbrella I dont use and its not "good enough". Its more she wants to look like she has money when she is technically homeless (as she tells me typing on her Iphone *rolleyes*) .

Now I do avoid taking mine if I can because I hate unbuckling 3 carseats lol.

ETA: im not talking FUN things but NECESSARY things.
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  #12  
Old 08-22-2012, 01:42 PM
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sparks19 sparks19 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fran101 View Post
Honestly, I used to have no pity for these hermit stressed out people. I used to RESENT my friends who got pregnant and could never come out or never wanted to come on trips with us with their kid. I mean..everyone knows kids are messy, time consuming and stressful.. I mean did they NOT have a plan? or 9 months to prepare?

but as I've gotten older and started to look closer at what some mothers DO everyday.. some WITHOUT full time help.. whatever you need to get through the day.. do it.
Some people deal the only way they can to stay sane..by staying indoors, by seemingly giving up on discipline, by bribing, by sitting their kids in front of the TV.
Who knows? Maybe they have a really fussy baby, a neglectful husband, depression, regret..
and like you said, some people just CAN'T HANDLE IT. And do the best they can.. It's hard for people who are GOOD at being parents to see that because it's something that does come almost naturally to some people.
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Originally Posted by JessLough View Post
Yep, what she said ^^

Parents are going to find different things hard, and some will have a harder time overall, no matter how easy you think their kid is or how much harder you think it is. Having more kids does not make somebody's life harder. It depends on the individual -- both the child and the adult.
AGREED!

Oh and paiges post too although I forgot to quote it lol. Different parents have different strengths and weaknesses and sometimes they have kids who seem to play on every weakness they have. I don't envy them and I don't want to laugh at their struggles.

Seriously, Hannah is a dream child lol. She never runs off, she is very rarely outright defiant, and I can take her all through the grocery store without her touching a thing or throwing a tanrum. but... because of this I am also very spoiled so on days when she is out of sorts I want to tear my hair out. Is it as bad as some people have it? not even close but it's way beyond normal for us so I often have less of a threshold for such moments.

What I can't stand is parents who just don't give a rats patoot and let their kids run wild around the grocery store while mom just chats on the phone and doesn't care that said child is knocking everything off the shelf and bumping into everyone. Those are the people we should be complaining about... not the people who just don't go out because they don't want to BE that parent outlined above lol. If you don't take your one child grocery shopping because it's not something you are prepared to handle at the moment then THANK YOU
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  #13  
Old 08-22-2012, 01:46 PM
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Paige Paige is offline
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People comment on how my kid is so well behaved when on the bus... and I just smile and think YEAH I'D HOPE SO HE HAS BEEN RUNNING AT FULL SPEED FOR THE LAST 5 HOURS. He really ISN'T well behaved. At least no more than anyone else's kid. I just know my own abiltiy and melt downs are so stressful I try and exhaust him before we go anywhere so him and I are not over our threshold.

I can't take Briggs to the park beside my house. He tries to run into the road every time. He won't listen. Try as I might he wants to play right in the middle of that freaking road and I just don't take him anymore. I've had one too many sprints after him where I've just got him by the hair before he barrels out into traffic. I am pretty confident in my ability to take him anywhere else. There? No.
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  #14  
Old 08-22-2012, 01:51 PM
JessLough JessLough is offline
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Meh, I'd rather see kids not going to a grocery store than then going, their parents getting pushed past their threshold and hurting them in the heat of the moment.
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  #15  
Old 08-22-2012, 01:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paige View Post
People comment on how my kid is so well behaved when on the bus... and I just smile and think YEAH I'D HOPE SO HE HAS BEEN RUNNING AT FULL SPEED FOR THE LAST 5 HOURS. He really ISN'T well behaved. At least no more than anyone else's kid. I just know my own abiltiy and melt downs are so stressful I try and exhaust him before we go anywhere so him and I are not over our threshold.

I can't take Briggs to the park beside my house. He tries to run into the road every time. He won't listen. Try as I might he wants to play right in the middle of that freaking road and I just don't take him anymore. I've had one too many sprints after him where I've just got him by the hair before he barrels out into traffic. I am pretty confident in my ability to take him anywhere else. There? No.
see I think this is key. Admitting when there are certain positions you can't or won't put yourself in anymore as a parent

We all struggle with something
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  #16  
Old 08-22-2012, 01:55 PM
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i am one who will not take the kids with me , I cant go with just chris and I , we dont go , he goes.

It is easier all around for us to do this , lugging 4 kids and 2 adults to the grocery/pharmacy/anywhere is to much. It is easier all around to just let him go and I stay with the kids.

I dont drive right now and he drives us everywhere.

When i do start driving again , i will take either the boys or the girls , no way in hell am i taking all 4 . at least i have a listener and a rebel with each set , so I only really have to worry with one as the other are angels to deal with.


well at least until the "Iwantssssssssssss " Start! lol
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  #17  
Old 08-22-2012, 01:58 PM
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darkchild16 darkchild16 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paige View Post
People comment on how my kid is so well behaved when on the bus... and I just smile and think YEAH I'D HOPE SO HE HAS BEEN RUNNING AT FULL SPEED FOR THE LAST 5 HOURS. He really ISN'T well behaved. At least no more than anyone else's kid. I just know my own abiltiy and melt downs are so stressful I try and exhaust him before we go anywhere so him and I are not over our threshold.

I can't take Briggs to the park beside my house. He tries to run into the road every time. He won't listen. Try as I might he wants to play right in the middle of that freaking road and I just don't take him anymore. I've had one too many sprints after him where I've just got him by the hair before he barrels out into traffic. I am pretty confident in my ability to take him anywhere else. There? No.
thats how Morgan and Bev are. At home omg youd think Taz was their dad. (currently one is dancing while standing on my couch lol and the other is attempting to climb my plastic office cart for the 5th time today so he can grab a peice of printer paper that I tried to give him already.) They are taught to behave in public OR be put in the cart, no park or some other punishment.

Again Im talking NECESSATIES not fun things. I bypass alot of things my moms group does because its scheduled at 10 in the morning and IM not getting all 3 of mine ready at 10 for a fun event. I take mine grocery shopping at 1am when Jeremy gets off so that we can get it done if its not something that HAS to be done by a certain time.
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Last edited by darkchild16; 08-22-2012 at 02:10 PM.
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  #18  
Old 08-22-2012, 02:05 PM
Fran27 Fran27 is offline
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Paige I never take my kids to playgrounds because I know they'll be too excited and run all over the place. I totally get it. Even now, they'd just run in two opposite directions. The few times we went to the children's museum we just each took one child and we still ran all over the place.

And honestly I don't take the kids out that much either. Some moms do it all the time but I can't imagining spending that money on gas just to do something every day (plus it's good for kids to learn to entertain themselves at home anyway). But the few times I've been out with just one kid omg it was so easy, lol. But still, I like being alone when I want to get things done, have a lot of errands to run etc.
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  #19  
Old 08-22-2012, 02:10 PM
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sparks19 sparks19 is offline
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That's great if it works. When my nePhew was young it got to the point where he was being disciplined more than not. He was always grounded, having stuff taken away, at one point his room was nothig but his bed and blankets. Being disciplined eventually became his new normal. I honestly don't know what else they could have done but he was totally apathetic to punishment. It didn't phase him at all
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“Meaninglessness does not come from being weary of pain. Meaninglessness comes from being weary of pleasure.”


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  #20  
Old 08-22-2012, 02:12 PM
Fran27 Fran27 is offline
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That's how mine are honestly. They have too much fun making a mess or whatever, that they don't care about the punishment. They grow past it though (mostly).
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