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  #31  
Old 08-18-2012, 11:21 AM
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I have a different perspective than most moms.

I had twins. At a little over 26 weeks they discovered that one of the babies had “absent end diastolic flow of the umbilical artery”. I was immediately hospitalized for what ended up being 5 weeks of bed rest. It was terrifying. Twice daily ultrasounds, constant fetal monitoring... If the “absent” part of the flow reverses, its fatal to the fetus. Fun times...

Adding to the fun, I had a placental abruption at 30 weeks, then again a few days shy of 32 weeks. Both placental abruptions clotted, and I stopped bleeding, and then, during one of the now all too familiar ultrasounds, they saw that one of the babies had lost all the amniotic fluid. No choice, C-section time for me, NICU time for the babies.

I spent a LONG time dealing with a lot of guilt for not gestating “right”, for not birthing “right”, for having NICU babies. This happens to pretty much all NICU moms from what I can tell. And for the record, I got preggers deliberately. Had a full physical with my Ob/Gyn, went on vitamins, did everything “right”. Was the picture of health both before getting pregnant and during my pregnancy. Yet I still “failed” at the most basic part of being a mom right?

Wrong. There’s no “right” way to birth a baby. I find home births, water births especially, very appealing, but I understand too why women would chose to stay in a hospital.
Like anything, I’d like to see women well-educated on the latest research and information and being able to make an educated choice on what is right for them and their preferences without unnecessary guilt-tripping and fear mongering.
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  #32  
Old 08-18-2012, 11:25 AM
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Originally Posted by Danefied View Post
I have a different perspective than most moms.

I had twins. At a little over 26 weeks they discovered that one of the babies had “absent end diastolic flow of the umbilical artery”. I was immediately hospitalized for what ended up being 5 weeks of bed rest. It was terrifying. Twice daily ultrasounds, constant fetal monitoring... If the “absent” part of the flow reverses, its fatal to the fetus. Fun times...

Adding to the fun, I had a placental abruption at 30 weeks, then again a few days shy of 32 weeks. Both placental abruptions clotted, and I stopped bleeding, and then, during one of the now all too familiar ultrasounds, they saw that one of the babies had lost all the amniotic fluid. No choice, C-section time for me, NICU time for the babies.

I spent a LONG time dealing with a lot of guilt for not gestating “right”, for not birthing “right”, for having NICU babies. This happens to pretty much all NICU moms from what I can tell. And for the record, I got preggers deliberately. Had a full physical with my Ob/Gyn, went on vitamins, did everything “right”. Was the picture of health both before getting pregnant and during my pregnancy. Yet I still “failed” at the most basic part of being a mom right?

Wrong. There’s no “right” way to birth a baby. I find home births, water births especially, very appealing, but I understand too why women would chose to stay in a hospital.
Like anything, I’d like to see women well-educated on the latest research and information and being able to make an educated choice on what is right for them and their preferences without unnecessary guilt-tripping and fear mongering.
Danefield Ive gone through the guilt to with Savannah. Mostly "why didnt my body hold her in until SHE was ready (she had swallowed amnionic fluid AND had immature lungs) I was going into labor no matter what when they started to induce me but since I wasnt in ACTIVE labor and had signs of preeclampsia starting they wanted to help my body along.
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  #33  
Old 08-18-2012, 11:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Danefied View Post
I have a different perspective than most moms.

I had twins. At a little over 26 weeks they discovered that one of the babies had “absent end diastolic flow of the umbilical artery”. I was immediately hospitalized for what ended up being 5 weeks of bed rest. It was terrifying. Twice daily ultrasounds, constant fetal monitoring... If the “absent” part of the flow reverses, its fatal to the fetus. Fun times...

Adding to the fun, I had a placental abruption at 30 weeks, then again a few days shy of 32 weeks. Both placental abruptions clotted, and I stopped bleeding, and then, during one of the now all too familiar ultrasounds, they saw that one of the babies had lost all the amniotic fluid. No choice, C-section time for me, NICU time for the babies.

I spent a LONG time dealing with a lot of guilt for not gestating “right”, for not birthing “right”, for having NICU babies. This happens to pretty much all NICU moms from what I can tell. And for the record, I got preggers deliberately. Had a full physical with my Ob/Gyn, went on vitamins, did everything “right”. Was the picture of health both before getting pregnant and during my pregnancy. Yet I still “failed” at the most basic part of being a mom right?

Wrong. There’s no “right” way to birth a baby. I find home births, water births especially, very appealing, but I understand too why women would chose to stay in a hospital.
Like anything, I’d like to see women well-educated on the latest research and information and being able to make an educated choice on what is right for them and their preferences without unnecessary guilt-tripping and fear mongering.

I hope i haven't been fear mongering I was just trying to point out the dangers of delivering a baby in a setting such as home in regards to when emergencies arise. I agree that people need to educate themselves and make informed decisions. In the end, we are all responsible for the decisions we make. Prior to becoming a nicu nurse, I had considered a home birth because I didn't realize all the potential risks involved. Many people have successful home births that are all that they wanted them to be... but there is that percentage of home births that have a grave outcome just for the fact that equipment or capable people with nicu training are not available right then and there. I guess I just look at it like playing russian roulette. You just never know what is going to happen in a delivery.
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  #34  
Old 08-18-2012, 11:37 AM
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I really like this from Birthing Beautiful Ideas:

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  #35  
Old 08-18-2012, 11:38 AM
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My mom had a natural birth but it was horrible. She was in a hospital but I was a giant 10 lb baby and they ended up having to cut her to get me out and they only gave her very very minimal pain reliever.

She said that wasn't the worst part though, because she had to get stitches from giving birth, she said that was very difficult to heal and she was in intense pain for about 2 weeks.

In the end she said if she ever had another baby, which she didn't. She'd definitely opt for C-section. We know a lot of people that have done it and it's a small opening, only a few stitches and heals with almost no scarring.

I don't want a baby so lucky I won't have to decide so soon but I think at this point I'm leaning towards C-section.

My aunt had 1 C-section and 1 natural birth with pain relief and she said she didn't have a preference either way.

I feel like the people that choose natural birth are very brave but I'd hate to have my mom's experience considering all the babies in our family have been 8-10 lbs and some were breech.
My nephew was not unusually big af birth but he got stuck in the birth canal at one point and my sil tore badly--200 stitches! O_O
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  #36  
Old 08-18-2012, 11:44 AM
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With my first birth I had an epi, everything went extremely fast, I think i was maybe in the hospital 8 hrs from start to finish, then moved to my room.
Second birth was drug free and was really good except that my baby swallowed amniotic fluid.
Third birth was probably my best, natural, had him within 2 hrs of being admitted to the hospital!
My twins were last, they were transverse ( i think thats the word) so it was an automatic c-section scheduled 1 week before my due date. C-section was the worst experience of my life My spinal didn't work, so they had to knock me out. Was just awful Recovery time was terrible vs natural.

If my husband and I have a baby in the future it will be all natural
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  #37  
Old 08-18-2012, 11:44 AM
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Just to clarify... I am not put off by C sections with no history because I feel it's bad for the mother or baby...

I just feel that OR's in a hospital should be reserved for medical nessecity lol. That's probably a ridiculous opinion lol.
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  #38  
Old 08-18-2012, 11:45 AM
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Originally Posted by stardogs View Post
I really like this from Birthing Beautiful Ideas:


thats awesome. Its all about information! I have friends who have done it all and it helps to know what they have been through although if you (general you) and your drs decide on a csection I would avoid ICan for info. I went for local info and was told I had no reason for a csection for size even though it was what my dr, MIDWIFE and I decided based on my medical history.
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  #39  
Old 08-18-2012, 11:48 AM
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I have had 2 c-sections. I am not interested at all in watching any kind of documentary on natural childbirth. I am certainly envious of those of you who can go into labor before your due dates and pop out a baby in 5 hours. I am not one of those people, and I don't feel like people who have those experiences should get to have an opinion on what my deliveries should be like unless they have medical degrees and have previously delivered thousands of babies in all different sorts of circumstances.

My OB likes to induce at 40 weeks, but will let you go over if you really want, but then she will do NSTs twice a week after 40 weeks.

So with Mason I went in the night before my due date to be induced, and that experience made me SO thankful that she encouraged me to be induced on my due date. Mason's heartrate dropped into the 50's before they even inserted the cervadil. After they inserted the cervadil, not even half hour later 3 nurses rush in, flip me over, give me oxygen, and his heartrate had dropped into the 50's again and took a minute to come back up. After that they removed the cervadil and we planned for c-section in the morning. The next morning my new nurse asked me how I felt about the c-section, and said she would be there for me if I decided I didn't want to do the c-section and when my OB came in she said I didn't have to do the c-section. However I chose to go ahead because I was scared how he would tolerate real labor contractions. And I do not regret at all that I made that decision. Pretty much the second she cut me open, she said we would have ended up back there in an emergency situation because his cord was wrapped tightly around his neck twice.

So that definitely makes me believe in monitoring the baby. What if I had waited until I went into my labor on my own, and then if I tried to labor at home as long as possible to avoid medical intervention? What would have happened if we hadn't known that his heartrate was dropping like that?

With Shay I considered a VBAC, but I will NOT do an induction after having had a c-section. I would either have to go into labor on my own or have a c-section. I ended up going with the c-section. I started having some signs of pre-eclampsia, and my OB prefers to deliver BEFORE it turns into pre-e. They considered my birth with Mason to be pregnancy induced hypertension also because when I went in to be induced my BP was high and after my c/s it was really bad I had to be given meds to bring it down because my head hurt worse than I have ever felt in my entire life! So with a history of that, she wanted to take precautions. Also I had been having contractions regularly for 3 months, often for hours at a time less than 5 minutes apart, painful and extremely uncomfortable, but doing absolutely NOTHING! And while I am thankful that I didn't have concerns of delivering pre-mature, by 38 weeks it sure would have been nice if my cervix showed some progress and it didn't. I was sitting in the wheelchair outside the OR before my c/s having painful contractions, and I told DH that it was a good thing I was about to have the c/s because I couldn't take it anymore to keep being miserable with those contractions and not actually be in the process of actively having a baby.

I think it is easier to deal with the contractions, if you know you are in labor, and progressing, and going to be going home with a baby. However I was basically in non-active labor for 3 months, and by that point with no progress yeah, sorry I was DONE.

I will ask when "I" am supposed to go into the hospital, and all nurses that don't know my history, will be like when your contractions are 5 minutes apart regularly. I would have gone into L & D at LEAST 2 times a week if I went in every time my contractions were regularly 5 minutes apart for hours at a time.

I was also anemic with both and almost to the point of having a blood transfusion after having Shay. Technically I was at the point where most people would have been given a transfusion since she said they normally do that when levels are at 7, but since my levels didn't drop very much since i started at a 9, she didn't do it right away, and just monitored me, and I didn't have to one.
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  #40  
Old 08-18-2012, 11:49 AM
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My nephew was not unusually big af birth but he got stuck in the birth canal at one point and my sil tore badly--200 stitches! O_O
Yikes.

My doc snipped me at the last second. 4 little stitches. pretty easy recovery. My uterus hurt much more than the stitches lol
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