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  #11  
Old 07-27-2012, 08:58 PM
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I never got the sense that any one of us three was a favorite. And when I'd ask, as a little kid, (I wonder how many kids ask) my Mom always told me adamantly, that they had no favorites...that they loved us all the same, but in different ways since we're different people.

I was the youngest and was probably a little more spoiled (in some ways) than my older siblings...was babied a bit, but did turn out to be responsible and be able to take care of myself, and then a family. I was still given chores and responsibilities as a kid. I had a lot of animals and it was my job to care for them, which I did gladly because I was really into them.

I think my sister is and was a little resentful and jealous. But that's a whole other story...maybe it would belong in the other thread about blood not being thicker than beet juice. lol. (if I ever get around to it)
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  #12  
Old 07-28-2012, 01:54 AM
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1. Are you/were you the favorite child growing up? (only children don't count, you lucky ducks! LOL)

No, My brother was preferred - he's a boy and Chinese families favor those with penises to "spread" their family legacies.

2. If you weren't the favorite, did you resent the favorite and/or resent the parent/s who made a difference?

I did not really give much of a sh!t. Sure it got annoying and irritating at times but I just sort of got on with things... Parents/family...yes, but resentment on alot of different levels. See my other family thread for details. But they went with MY choice when it came to get the family dog when we were kids...a Shiba Inu over my brother's choice of a Norwich Terrier. Funny, to this day I still don't have much affection for Norwiches...

3. If you weren't the favorite, how has the favorite turned out as an adult?

Arrogant, smirky yet infuriatingly dumb and bland a$shole. We live under the same roof but don't have much to do with each other. I asked to borrow $200 the other month and he told me to go f@ck off. He asked to borrow $80 a few days ago - I told him to shove a pipe up his a$$. Ya, precious sibling moments...

4. What are some difference made between the favorite and non favorite in the household?

The boy was supposed to be the more dynamic, responsible, and virtuous one - instead he ended up a lazy, self serving, porno addict of a bum that whines about being asked to pick up after himself in the kitchen and "public" portions of the house.

I was supposed to be dredged in humility, have an inferior sort of attitude, be dumb and quiet, and subservient. WRONGGGGGG....

I got abit too wild, opinionated, offbeat, and well, modern for their liking (as well as the whole families..) and here I am today...a rare dog fancying girl that enjoys K-Pop, studies of the mind, and yoga. When they were expecting a closeted waifish sort of figure that just shadowed her mom or dad around. Huh.
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  #13  
Old 07-28-2012, 03:50 AM
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My brother and I are 14 years apart, so I think we both had our periods of being "the favorite." He was/is also pretty much my grandmas favorite grand child.
Now...I don't know, I really do think that my mom favors both of us equally, but in certain instances she favors him and vice versa. I think me being sick also led to being crazy spoiled. I wouldn't say that he was put on the back burner because of my sickness, but I'd say he grew up a lot and basically turned into my dad. I know it's not my fault, but I think it really sucks for him and I feel bad with how fast he quickly had to become a responsible adult, sometimes I feel like he didn't enjoy this youth enough because of me.
I would never resent him if I realized that my mom favors him because well, i favor him too, lol, he is literally my favorite person in the family. He's very successful and I'm really proud of him.
The only thing I resent is when people compare me to him, but I've learned to just not listen.
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  #14  
Old 07-28-2012, 02:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ACooper View Post
1. Are you/were you the favorite child growing up? (only children don't count, you lucky ducks! LOL)When my brother left home I was an only kid. Before that it seemed like I was always trying to catch up to him. Ten year age difference so that was kind of impossible. He shook his favorite status dropping out of college. But otherwise he had the job, a wonderful wife, the 2.2 kids and the house in the burbs. Me? It took me a &%#% of a lot longer to grow up I guess.

2. If you weren't the favorite, did you resent the favorite and/or resent the parent/s who made a difference?Not as much resenting as not understanding. My Mom was like a tank sometimes, very outspoken. I was small, shy and mousey. Funny though that I've become more like her than I ever imagined.

3. If you weren't the favorite, how has the favorite turned out as an adult?He was a hippie in the 60's, now he embraces the conservatives. He's going to retire out in the woods and write his manifesto...I'm a tree-hugging liberal

4. What are some difference made between the favorite and non favorite in the household?
People who have adult children understand when I say I tried hard not to play favorites, I really did. But some of your kids you just "get" better than others. You understand them better. My oldest was intellectual from an early age and he got my hair besides. We've always been close. The youngest I understand because I too was learning disabled as a kid. The ones inbetween...somebody must have switched kids in the nursery cause I never quite figured out where they came from...crap happens
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  #15  
Old 07-28-2012, 02:21 PM
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As adults, my sister and I once debated who was the favorite child while growing up. We finally asked my mom flat-out. Without even hesitating, Mom said, "Tigger." Tigger was our dearly departed childhood golden retriever. My sister and I exchanged glances, and had to agree. Mom always did like Tigger best, LOL.
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  #16  
Old 07-28-2012, 02:44 PM
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My parents don't really have favorites. There are 6 of us, and I can't think of any instances of someone getting treated unfairly. Unless you count us younger kids getting off easier because they've gotten more lax over the years.
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  #17  
Old 07-28-2012, 04:47 PM
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1. Are you/were you the favorite child growing up? (only children don't count, you lucky ducks! LOL)
I am my mums favourite child and my sister is my dads. It sounds fair but it isn't. My mum tries not to favour me but my dad openly favours my sister.

2. If you weren't the favorite, did you resent the favorite and/or resent the parent/s who made a difference?
Yes and sort of. My sister and I hate each other. We are constantly competing with each other for attention and approval. It wouldn't be so bad but a few months back my sister started spreading pretty vicious lies about me to my parents and some of the things she said were unforgivable. I resent my dad and I understand why he favours her as well. He's not my biological father (although he married my mum when I was 2 so he's always just been "Dad" to me) and she's his biological daughter. Plus we're not interested in any of the same things whereas my sister and him have a lot in common. It doesn't make it any easier but at least I understand it. Another thing is that my mum always used him as a threat to me when I was younger ( "You're lucky your dad isn't here" "wait until your father gets home" etc) and that really put me off him.

3. If you weren't the favorite, how has the favorite turned out as an adult?
N/A since we're both still teenagers and by default we're self obsessed, whiny brats lol.

4. What are some difference made between the favorite and non favorite in the household?
The one that annoys me the most is that she ALWAYS gets the most money spent on her/ whatever she wants. Part of it is that I work now so I usually have money anyway but it started long before that. For example when I was 11 and taking my exams to see what school I could go to I was promised a laptop if I got an A. I did and got a laptop and a mini moto. My sister was jealous and wanted the same. She got hers before she even took the exam (which she barely passed). Clothes is another example, I rarely get new clothes and I have barely anything that fits properly. My sister gets new clothes all the time. I also have to pay for all my own hair cuts and such. My sister just got her hair dyed after my dad told me he had no money to buy me the book I wanted

My pet hate is report cards. I am expected to get a perfect report card. I usually get very good report cards but my parents will always focus on the part(s) I did badly on. My sisters report cards are never as good as mine and yet she's always praised and the bad parts glossed over. In fact when I was her age I brought back a report card very similar to hers this year. I had to leave the house in tears to get away from my parents because they kept yelling at me about it. When she brought her report card home they were delighted with her.

And then there's responsibilities. I've always had the most responsibilities of us both. When I was 11 I had to care for 3 ponies and 2 horses by myself as well as any extra chores given to me. Now that my sister is 13 all she has to do is feed the cats and straighten up the sofa on occasion. Every single night she forgets to feed the cats until she's reminded and then whines about it. Meanwhile as well as my 2 jobs, I have to sort out the dogs and goats, vacuum the living room, do laundry and make sure the rest of the house is fairly tidy. And make sure my sister feeds the cats.
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  #18  
Old 07-28-2012, 05:56 PM
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My younger sister is an only child.

She's a self absorbed bitch who gets what she wants by throwing tantrums, and not only does it not matter who she has to run over to get it, if there is someone to screw over it's a bonus. She has a lot of uncontrolled anger issues. I've been on the receiving end of physical attacks, one involving having her boyfriend pin my arms behind my back while she went to town on me.

She learned at an early age that she could make up anything, no matter how absurd it was, and mom would beat the hell out of me for it, even if it was patently and obviously untrue.

She was screwing her boss and managed to marry him after his very ugly divorce. My mother still believes there was nothing going on on all those weekend trips they took for "skating races."

If she wanted something when we were kids, she got it, no matter what and no matter who had to go without for her to have it. I learned not to even ask, just do whatever I needed to do to get it for myself or, mostly, realize I could live without it. I learned to make my own clothes before I was in high school.

I used to tell her I was adopted and wasn't related to any of them, lol.

That pretty much tells the story.
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  #19  
Old 07-29-2012, 11:20 AM
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I was an only child, so yes, I was the favorite. I don't think I was all that spoiled and I learned early tantrums were a surefire way to guarantee that I DIDN'T get what I wanted. Actually, I have several cousins who have siblings that I think have been much more spoiled.

I was the favorite grandchild though--grandpa called me his "5th child" and was the only person in the world allowed to call me "Chrissy" as opposed to "Christina." I was the first one born and my cousin born after me didn't come along for 6 more years. I had many wonderful experiences with my grandparents and they were a huge part of my life as a kid.

By the time the other grandkids came along my grandparents were getting older, then my grandpa got sick. It does make me sad that my cousins never got to have the relationship that I did with my grandparents. They were such a wonderful influence and I miss them terribly though they've been gone for years now.
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