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  #31  
Old 07-22-2012, 12:05 PM
JessLough JessLough is offline
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You are 100% right. It is her life, and at the end of the day, if she wants to do it, she will do it, there is nothing you can do or say. Please, don't beat yourself up if anything happens. You went and did all you can, it's all up to her now to take the steps into getting help.
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  #32  
Old 07-22-2012, 05:24 PM
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StephyMei1112 StephyMei1112 is offline
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I'm quite numb...

I know it's up to her and I shouldn't feel guilty in the event of something but still...
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  #33  
Old 07-29-2012, 10:56 PM
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Oh God....

She's throwing a fit again tonight. I really hope it doesn't last and is easily vented.

I genuinely care for her but this is very exhausting - I imagine it must be quite excruciating for her as well; she's said on more than one occasion she is tired of "her own drama and life's pains". So still, as exasperated as I am now...can't help but being more concerned for her....
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Feudin' and fightin' and a-fussin,'
That's all that's goin' on with us'n!
We are such neighborly people, peaceful and sweet!
All except when we happen to meet.


Stories, Poetry, and Musings
http://inugami1112.wordpress.com/

"And it's all been lost before, so there's nothing to lose..."


"There are those that love dogs insanely and those that don't. But once you like a dog, you're sunk. You're a dog person for life."

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  #34  
Old 07-29-2012, 11:25 PM
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Renee750il Renee750il is offline
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Hang onto your own sanity. If you let yourself get stretched too thin you won't be able to hold steady.

Breathe. In and out. Don't let her drama become yours -- acknowledge it, reach out to her, but don't take it into yourself. It's difficult . . .
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  #35  
Old 07-30-2012, 04:15 PM
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Kayla Kayla is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Renee750il View Post
Hang onto your own sanity. If you let yourself get stretched too thin you won't be able to hold steady.

Breathe. In and out. Don't let her drama become yours -- acknowledge it, reach out to her, but don't take it into yourself. It's difficult . . .
^^^^

This, I send you so many zen vibes. I have a very close friend in a similar situation and it is so hard and heartbreaking. I found councelling for myself after she had a sucide attempt. I learnt so many helpful things about nursuing myself and also ways to be an advocate for your loved one/ friend/ family member while still having boundaries that nurse yourself.

You are a really amazing friend, and human being.

There are lots of great things to read about things to do to feel zen that I recommend.

You need to find support for yourself, because loving someone through sucidial thoughts, or actions has a huge toll on your spirit.
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  #36  
Old 07-30-2012, 06:19 PM
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She's quite...volatile.

She said she's tired of being a wreck, disappointing herself and others, of constantly feeling hurt and betrayed and abandoned and sorry for herself and that she's just quite exhausted. She said she doesn't quite know where to go either, that she's scared to move one way or the other. Her last message was "I don't think u quite get it. Good bye."

I don't fear she will try something at this moment from that message - but she is probably in turmoil and my heart is aching.

Thanks so much Renee - you always have great, sound, wise counsel - something in common with my friend.

Kayla,

Thanks alot too. What you say does make sense and I'm sorry about your experience and your friend. The Kuvasz is quite a support and soothing factor actually - she challenges me, intrigues, entertains, frustrates, and relaxes me and focusing on her does help alot. I've done the counseling thing before and perhaps it was just the wrong counselor but it didn't do much for me personally.

Well she's been thru hell and back for me, taken alot of my sh!t, given up alot to help me when I was in need, and so much more. I just find it unconscionable to turn my back to her or not to do all I possibly can for her in her time of need.

Back about two years ago the following conversation in my car ensued at 4:30 AM on a November morning.

Me: "You won't get tired of me or my problems?"
Her: "No, I won't. I'll be tired of seeing you sad or burdened by them; and I'll help you fight them off, but no I'll never tire of you or anything that's bothering you....you might get tired of me though..."
Me: "Why would you say that? I won't and I'll listen and be there for you too if you're having problems as well - you matter the world to me"
Her: "Promise you'll be there?"
Me: "Promise" - and we pinky promised about that.

I don't plan on going back on that anytime soon or ever.

In the meantime; the dog entering heat, household chores, BBC wildlife docs on youtube, and praline lined chocolate should keep me sane enough to carry on myself. I've got no work the whole month of august and the team for a hotel project at the interior design firm I was working with (as a freelancer albeit) was downsized - I was in the group that was taken off the team. Yeah life and this year does suck but I have to find some way to keep going on myself...
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Feudin' and fightin' and a-fussin,'
That's all that's goin' on with us'n!
We are such neighborly people, peaceful and sweet!
All except when we happen to meet.


Stories, Poetry, and Musings
http://inugami1112.wordpress.com/

"And it's all been lost before, so there's nothing to lose..."


"There are those that love dogs insanely and those that don't. But once you like a dog, you're sunk. You're a dog person for life."

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AKC Kuvasz Standard
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