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Old 06-13-2012, 01:04 PM
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darkchild16 darkchild16 is offline
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Default Raising a Autistic Child as a single parent. Anyone here been there?

I can use some advice. Morgan was just informally dx'd with Autism (hes too young for a official dx) He starts intense speech therapy and OT soon. I just was wondering if anyone else has done it alone and if I can get some tips on how best to work it out in my new life.

TIA.
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Old 06-13-2012, 01:11 PM
-bogart- -bogart- is offline
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not an austic one here , but special needs with the seizure disorder and developmental delay.

I really dont have any good advise as most is just like normal things trial and error. maybe Sal or someone else with austism can help better there , but do wanna say HUGE HUGS!!!!

and google can be a huge friend or enemy , try to remember that.

and remember you can do this!
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Old 06-13-2012, 01:22 PM
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darkchild16 darkchild16 is offline
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Thankfully as far as the disorder goes Im covered. He has a whole team of teachers on his side to help me including Bax. Its more how to manage as a single parent with all his needs. Morgan technically has that dx currently with the possibility of autism. Right now we are just getting by and finding ways to cope until we can work with him better. Im hoping once we start working with him alot will change but right now I just hope this is as bad as he gets at least for now.

Thanks
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Old 06-13-2012, 01:32 PM
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well , with caleb his seizure started when he was 3 , so before then he was a normal healthy happy boy.

After i dont really know how i would have done it alone honestly , i would have managed i am sure . Enlist all the help you can , a live in nanny/room mate if you could swing it.

I dont want to contribute to scaring or panicking you , but think about this , Bev is getting into stuff while the baby howls and morgan has a seizure , Ideally you could have help to stop bev pick up baby and while you monitor morgan.

Do you have any close family you could go into a situation like that with , i suggest it because that is what we do here. one of chris's closes friends lives with us and we provide room and board. ya mom , cuz's or a good friend?
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Old 06-13-2012, 01:33 PM
JessLough JessLough is offline
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Don't let the diagnosis become his worst enemy.

By far, the autistic folks I have dealt with, the most functioning are the ones whose parents didn't excuse everything because of the diagnosis. Yes, autistic kids can lead a normal life. The worst are the ones whose parents have let the diagnosis lead their loves -- "oh no, he can't possibly do that!" "this behavior is ok, he's autistic".

It's kind if like how people with little dogs let them get away with jumping and lunging/growling and pulling the leash, for lack of better way to express it. They're little, so "it's ok"

ETA: that was badly worded. You know I didn't mean it that way <3
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Old 06-13-2012, 01:38 PM
-bogart- -bogart- is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JessLough View Post
Don't let the diagnosis become his worst enemy.

By far, the autistic folks I have dealt with, the most functioning are the ones whose parents didn't excuse everything because of the diagnosis. Yes, autistic kids can lead a normal life. The worst are the ones whose parents have let the diagnosis lead their loves -- "oh no, he can't possibly do that!" "this behavior is ok, he's autistic".

It's kind if like how people with little dogs let them get away with jumping and lunging/growling and pulling the leash, for lack of better way to express it. They're little, so "it's ok"

This also , i was going to get to it and got wrapped up in logistics.

Dont let his disability be a crutch to miss out on life. And dont let it become his shield for wrong doing ,

caleb tried to blame being bad on his brain not working , he wanted to exchange it for one that would let him do good . yeah bull crap he just was bad and got caught. lol

on that note also , with caleb he does not transiton from task to task well at all, so it is super important for him to learn the proper procedure the first time or it is is engraved wrong forever in his mind.
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Old 06-13-2012, 01:39 PM
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Yeah I have that here. Bevs pretty good at stopping EVERYTHING and helping me when Morgan has a seizure. We practice that alot anyway just because Jeremy worked alot. She is a big help for her age and she LOVES it so that is a blessing. I cant keep her from trying to give babies their bottles and pacifiers when we are around friends babies always gently too.

We also have ventured into the world of baby wearing so most of the time I have a feeling she will be worn just because of how Morgan can be. Plus it helps Morgan cope SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much better then anything else. We actually went to a AKC OB show to watch a few classes and he was calm the entire time because he was in his carrier tightly sorta like a weighted blanket.

I dont let him for the most part the tantrums currently I am we work together and I try but until we get that intervention I dont know exactly the way to go about it. We are working on sign language and we always speak slowly and VERY clearly to him since that is his biggest hurdle. I lived with a grown man who grew up letting it be his sheild as I have found out and never will I let that happen to Morgan. Yes hes disabled but he is one smart little monster and we can do anything together.
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Old 06-13-2012, 01:42 PM
-bogart- -bogart- is offline
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i keep forgeting how big bev is now. major sad face ,
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Old 06-13-2012, 01:42 PM
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There is a incredble community online called Autism Speaks. There's articles, forums, resources for every age child. Especially as a single parent you need to hear from other Moms...you feel so alone with an exceptional kid sometimes. Since Emmy's diagnosis at 3 I've found out there are Mom's like us EVERYWHERE, you just have to reach out.

A good book to begin with is " The Elephant in the Playroom", stories of kids with all kids of disabilities. Some aren't as challenged as your child and others are a whole lot worse. But it's the parents telling how they cope, make peace with and yup, learn to laugh eventually.

There are more resources than ever before for autism. Keep all the paperwork organized, IEP's come out the size of phone books sometimes, have a file for everything. Another thought, especially as a single parent, your child might be elegible for SSI benefits. Any questions and I'm all ears...
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Old 06-13-2012, 01:43 PM
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shes 4.5 She starts VPK this year I cant believe it honestly.
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