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  #31  
Old 06-11-2012, 08:53 PM
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NicoleLJ NicoleLJ is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AdrianneIsabel View Post
I think the general reasoning for that statement is that one time rapists are not common and if no one speaks up we as a society can't protect the next victim.

It's a very ugly place to be.
That is a very easy thing to believe until you are in the victims shoes. And it is very hard for many looking on the outside in to really truly know how hard it is.

I fully agree with the others. If you are ready try therapy. Another good place to help you find some good therapists is womens shelters. They can point you in some really good directions for one on one therapy or group therapy and the like. PM any time. I can't ever say I fully understand what you went through or have been going through since. No one can but you. But I can say I understand some of the pain you are going through and how this can be a day to day struggle. (((HUGS)))

LauraLeigh - I agree 100%
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  #32  
Old 06-11-2012, 08:57 PM
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Originally Posted by LauraLeigh View Post
Swabby,

It's much easier to say you should have prosecuted when you are not in the persons shoes.....

I have personally feel enough guilt, without someone who was not there, adding to it, ESP someone who worked on a rape crisis line!!!

Mia needs support and unserstanding not judgement and this is the last place or thread for that opinion...

Please, please don't take this there...
OK, I am deleting.

Last edited by swabby; 06-11-2012 at 09:12 PM.
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  #33  
Old 06-11-2012, 08:59 PM
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AdrianneIsabel AdrianneIsabel is offline
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Eh, it's also very easy to assume people with a different outlook never went through their own story.

I respect the "stay quiet" and I value the "please tell someone".

I really hope therapy helps, that alone is a scary step - I know.
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  #34  
Old 06-11-2012, 09:00 PM
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Originally Posted by swabby View Post
I did not mean it that way. But, if that is the way it is being read.

Deleted. My Humble Apologies.
It could be just me, very touchy issue and I was really worried the thread would get derailed... Guilt is a nasty thing and my guilt haunts me more than anything else.. Guilt that I was too weak, I know how awful that feels and don't want Mia to feel a tenth of that..
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  #35  
Old 06-11-2012, 09:03 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LauraLeigh View Post
It could be just me, very touchy issue and I was really worried the thread would get derailed... Guilt is a nasty thing and my guilt haunts me more than anything else.. Guilt that I was too weak, I know how awful that feels and don't want Mia to feel a tenth of that..
OMG, I don't seem to be able to do anything right tonight.

I wasn't tagging your post in particular.

Let me see, if I can fix this mess.

Sorry!
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  #36  
Old 06-11-2012, 09:04 PM
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This is why I always say it is the victims choice and neither is wrong. To pressure or guilty them into doing something they might not be able to emotionally handle can be very damaging. But I also have a lot of respect for the ones that have the support and strength to try and prosecute the rapist. Neither choice is wrong. And no one should feel guilty(easier said then done, I KNOW) for the choice they made no matter what it is. They need support, love and acceptance above all and a safe place to unload if that is possible,
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  #37  
Old 06-11-2012, 09:05 PM
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K
Quote:
Originally Posted by swabby View Post
OMG, I don't seem to be able to do anything right tonight.

I wasn't tagging your post in particular.

Let me see, if I can fix this mess.

Sorry!
No no it's ok....

You brought up something a million people likely think, the above was an attempt on my part to apologize and admit I may be overly sensitive, I know you didn't mean me specifically you just hit on one of my biggest remaining issues...

I also am in awe of those with the strength to prosecute, I just was too scared, and lacked the strength to do it if I am honest..
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  #38  
Old 06-11-2012, 09:06 PM
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My Apologies Guys,
I have deleted as much as I can.

I am a newbie and I NEVER meant to ruffle any fur.

I CAN promise you all, I meant no harm.
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  #39  
Old 06-11-2012, 09:09 PM
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Now it all looks very ignorant, because I don't know how to completely "delete".
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  #40  
Old 06-11-2012, 09:09 PM
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I can understand both views on it. I don't think the message was meant to be rude at all.
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