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Old 04-20-2012, 02:11 AM
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Fran, whats wrong with your nose? Why does the person paying for this think there is something wrong with your nose? Is there a medical reason for this?

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Old 04-20-2012, 02:42 AM
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I think two years ago I would have been appalled at the idea, because like everyone has already said, Fran is just beautiful and clearly does not need a nose job (medically or for improving self image). I'm almost certain I flipped out at my younger sister for even bringing this up (she was 14 or 15 at the time). Couldn't see anything wrong with her nose or profile and still can't, but right now, she is to nose job specialists as I am to German Shepherd Dog breeders. So at this point... eh.

I don't think the gift necessarily implies that anyone thinks there is anything wrong with her nose - among some people, it would be like a gift card or a set up with a high end hair stylist/salon. Honestly, I've known of people who tell me they are going to get eyelid surgery or a nose job like they are popping in at a dentist's appointment. If they gave a friend or a relative money for plastic surgery, it wouldn't be saying "hey, I don't like your nose. Go change it!", just as the gift of new clothes wouldn't be sending the message "I hate your style, so go put on this dress". Maybe they are acting on their own preferences rather than thinking of Fran's. At least, I hope so because I agree that she doesn't need to change a thing about herself.

For what it's worth, I don't think this is a great idea, either. Not an outright bad, life changing decision because of the doctor's credibility and well, it's Fran's body, but I wouldn't go for it, either. I think there's a lot wrong with my body but it doesn't damage my self esteem, and my nose is one of the few things I don't have an issue with.

I don't think this is for sure a poorly intentioned gesture, but that being said, obligation to the person who gave the gift should not be a part of the motivation.
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Old 04-20-2012, 02:51 AM
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Thanks for the input guys, and no there isn't a medical reason.

and thank you for thinking that I don't need one lol I think all this nose talk more than anything has really made me focus on it and thinking it's a bigger issue than it is..

It's an odd gift.. I wish I could explain it properly but umm.. my family is from Haiti but we also are from Lebanon and some from Iran, so much of our family is kind of up and around there. Including my uncle (not really an uncle, but my family is huge and every older male cousin is an uncle), well on his side of the family, it's a rather common gift. It's kind of like a coming of age, it's incredibly normal (even poorer families save up to get their daughters noses done. It's incredibly common. good noses. bad noses.. we had a whole discussion on this cultural phenomenon) anyway during the discussion, I mentioned I didn't really like mine but wouldn't be ok spending that much money on something so well..frivolous.

and so, my graduation rolls along in a week or two, so, he offered me this.

It really isn't meant as a jab or insult, I wish I could explain it properly.. but it really is quite a normal occurrence in the culture to give this kind of thing. His wife made a joke comparing the gift to a savings bond lol

I am going to go to the consultation. It's just a few pictures, and I'll ask some harm done.

Chances are, honestly, I won't go through with it. I had no idea the surgery was so invasive or recovery time so long.. especially for something I don't really hate. (we have some STRONG noses in my family..Iranian, Lebanese.. but I never really got "the nose" as we call it, and honestly never really minded my nose before.. which is what really makes me stop and think that maybe this is just me over analyzing my face too much)

Not to mention. I still haven't told my parents about all this.
and something tells me they are NOT going to be very happy about it.

Disclaimer: I work for Trupanion and love it/our policy! But I do not speak for the company or as the company.
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Old 04-20-2012, 03:03 AM
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Hell, I would do it.

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Old 04-20-2012, 05:03 AM
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Fran, that's exactly the impression I had. My younger sister immerses herself in Korean culture (despite not being Korean...) where nose jobs, double eyelid surgery (yes, it's a thing!), and all variations of plastic surgery are the norm. Many of the girls she chats with get double eyelid surgery or nose jobs for their 16th birthdays, no big deal.

They don't have problems with self image, never have, and no one pressures them into doing so - it's just the general mindset and how things are among them. Breakfast at 10 AM, watch a bit of TV, meet a couple friends for lunch, have to make it to a double eyelid surgery at 2 PM, but hey, are we still on for the party next weekend? Like I said, might as well be going to the dentist or a hair salon. I figure it isn't quite the same, but the idea is very similar. Couldn't imagine anyone telling you there was something wrong with the way you look!

I really wouldn't do it, personally. Surgery scares me shitless. But I know my sister eventually will, she obsesses over that nose of hers. It's not a drastic, life altering decision. I used to be completely opposed to the idea, but now I'm completely neutral. Heck, if someone wanted to buy me a boob job I'd definitely consider it
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Old 04-20-2012, 07:56 AM
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Originally Posted by Miakoda View Post
The absolute worst part of the whole process is having 800 yards of cotton packing pulled out your sinuses via your nostrils. Ok, so maybe not 800, but it sure as heck felt like it! It burned and hurt so bad that I saw white spots. It's the first time I ever passed out (it was brief...I was only out for a few seconds), I have a very high pain tolerance.
This seriously made me cringe.

I don't have anything of use to add to this discussion - just that I think your nose fits your face perfect. And that if someone offered me an anything consultation I would probably do it just out of curiosity. Lol

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Old 04-20-2012, 08:29 AM
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My thoughts on this.. I think people look better, are prettier when their faces have character. Particularly as one ages. So for me, I think most people look better they where (baring serious issues) I like your nose Fran its a good on. Its got character without making you any less pretty than you would be with a 'hollywood nose'. IMO people tend to look generic when they have had work done.

All that said, its your nose. If it will make you happy to change it, then go for it!
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Old 04-20-2012, 08:48 AM
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Originally Posted by Fran101 View Post
Not to mention. I still haven't told my parents about all this.
and something tells me they are NOT going to be very happy about it.
Not happy that surgery's on the table, or not happy that that you're considering not having the surgery? (do I get bonus points for the double-negative?)

Originally Posted by Dekka View Post
My thoughts on this.. I think people look better, are prettier when their faces have character. Particularly as one ages. So for me, I think most people look better they where (baring serious issues) I like your nose Fran its a good on. Its got character without making you any less pretty than you would be with a 'hollywood nose'. IMO people tend to look generic when they have had work done.

All that said, its your nose. If it will make you happy to change it, then go for it!
^This. All of this. And for what it's worth I work with a lot of Lebanese, Iranian, etc. folks and I totally get what you mean by The Nose lol...not to mention that my own family has rather odd noses...Dad's side has a sort of wide ruddy nose...Mom broke her nose as a kid so there's that. Use kids all got pretty lucky right up until I accidentally broke my brother's nose with a softball when we were kids...and it broke to the same side as my mom's so now the little curve looks genetic but it's not lol.
But anyway from the pics I've seen of you, yeah you definitely don't have The have a nicely refined nose that still has a touch of character...honestly I love your nose it's perfect. But if you want it changed that is totally up to you. To paraphrase from another thread...your body your rules And someone else paying for it is nice too

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Old 04-20-2012, 08:51 AM
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Fran, I understand what you are saying about your relative. Sounds like he thought he was doing something nice for you, not that he thought you needed a nose job, LOL

IMO, you are beautiful just the way you are..........BUT........if this is something that would make you feel more beautiful, or give you more confidence, then GO FOR IT.

I do a gob of things to help me feel more beautiful, and it isn't because I feel bad about myself or think I'm ugly..........there's teeth whitening strips, make up, hair dye, wrinkle cream, hair straightener, nail polish, on and on and on. True that none of those things are surgery, but here's the truth........when I feel I need a face lift, if I can afford one, I'M THERE BABY! LOL Superficial? Yep, don't care. If the barn needs painting, I'm painting the barn.......FOR ME, not what other people think
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Old 04-20-2012, 09:00 AM
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It doesn't matter what other people think or if they think your nose has character the way it is or if they think you're beautiful and should leave it alone. The point is how YOU feel about it. When I was young, kids would tease me about my nose and call me names like "water mellon nose." I didn't have a water mellon shaped nose. I had an "aristocratic" nose, according to my parents. I thought it looked more like a parrot's nose and I was always self conscious about it and would avoid standing sideways in a grocery store while looking on the shelves. I did NOT like my nose. I wasn't bad looking all together, but my nose, I felt, spoiled my appearance and no matter what others said to brush it off or try to make me feel better about it, it made me think about how I looked too much. And I don't like having to think that way all the time. I'm really not a very vain person, but that nose made me that way. What's important is if there's a way to make you feel happier about your looks, (not somebody else) if it's safe, the surgeon is reputable, then why the heck not?

Sooooooo....when I was about 29 or 30, my husband said to go for it if that's what I wanted. (surgery) So, I did. The plastic surgeon used some kind of rasp and wittled down the bone so it would be straighter. He made three tiny, tiny holes, one on top near the bridge, two on either side and did all the wittling from going in through the inside of the nostrils and I think those holes were just used to do the hammer and chisel work that breaks the bone. (can't really remember exactly) So, there was no scarring at all possible on the outside.

I was put on narcotics like general. I would go in and out of sleep and could hear the doc and nurse talking. He asked her while he was rasping away, "Do you think that's enough?" And then the nurse said, "Yeah, she didn't want a cutesy turned up nose." LOL.

I don't remember any pain to speak of afterwards. Underneath the eyes and cheek bones were all black and blue. But there was no pain. And there was some kind of bandage and something to hold everything together for a week or two...don't recall the details. But I don't remember any horrible pain deal going on. Of course, I suppose it varies between people.

It was near Halloween. And when the little kids came to the door trick-or-treating, one of them asked me in an enthusiastic voice, "Hey...what are YOU???" wanting to know what I was dressing up as.

Give it some more thought and decide what's best for you. Is spending the money, going through the ordeal and possibly having some pain, taking the risk that it might not turn out right or you might have some scar tissue problem later on, (or whatever risks or side effects the doctor explains to you) worth the chance that you will feel better about yourself in general and your looks in particular for a long time to come?
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