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  #21  
Old 03-29-2012, 10:10 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Candice007 View Post
If he doesn't love you, and can treat you like this, he isnt worth it.
Doesnt sound like you care right now, but obviously he is an idiot......You deserve better, you deserve someone who loves you and who will treat you right, not just get up and leave without explaination.
It will take a long long time, but you need your friends, family and your dog right now, and it will all work out. I promise. xx
He hasn't up and left,I just meant in the title that we've broken up.At the moment he can't even move out,so he has to sleep on the sofa.Tbh i would rather he was nasty and horrible,then I could shout,scream and hate him.But he is being supportive.I'm just struggling with the fact he's been unhappy for a year and hasn't told me.That PISSES me off.He say's I still love you,just not in the way were meant to love each other(yeah I knew something was wrong when he started speaking movie talk)"I'll still be here for you,I want to be your friend,your my family" Grrr I know I'm defending him.I just don't know how to be when I can't be angry -_-

Quote:
Originally Posted by em&ollie View Post
I've been in exactly this position before. We were together from a young age, for many years and we had discussed in extensive detail our future children and plans etc. One day suddenly it was "I don't love you anymore," except by text. It's the hardest thing I've ever been through, not going to lie. Just a warning, about 3 months after the event he wanted to start hooking up again. Of course I took this as a fantastic sign, once we're back in that setting he'll remember how much he loves me! But he knew how I felt and his thoughts hadn't changed, he was just using me. It made things so much harder for me, and it did nothing for what little dignity I had left. I don't have much advice to offer sorry because for me it just took time, but I just wanted to warn you about what happened to me. I know nothing makes sense at all, I know it feels like you can't breathe or even that you're too scared to take your next breath, like your whole world is crashing down around you. I'm so sorry you've had to go through this. But through it all you will find yourself, and you will find something (whether it be your friends, pets, a hobby, anything) that you can hold on to that will help you through this. Good luck with everything.
Thank you,I'll try and remember that.I can feel myself thinking that way,I thought when I woke up this morning he would say something,take it all back but that didn't happen.He still trying to call me "baby",I'm like you gotta drop that from your vocab.Today is better,I'm sorry for the melodramatic post's I'm a drama queen.I went to the doctors (for a chest problem)but also ended up crying (I sooooo didn't want to) she said I should try some Rescue Remedy.
--------------------3hours later lol------------------------------
Thank you so much everyone,seriously.I just feel sick,like I'm waiting to wake up or for him to say he didn't mean it.God I need some more dignity and less pride.I can't even tell my family,all I can think is I wanted this to work so bad.My aunt was over doing work with him so I managed to put a brave face on for 4hours,that exhausted me.Luckily he is going to a friends tonight and my friend is going to stay over.Hopefully I can sleep tonight,I need some sleeping pills.I know its ridiculous but all i can think is what is Coco going to think she loves him so much
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  #22  
Old 03-29-2012, 10:20 AM
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Oh and in terms of hobbies,pffftttt I'm in my final term of uni, I need to be working my ass off on a film project,it came to a standstill because i have bronchitis.I'm ill in bed which makes this worse,it's sunny outside I could have been in the park with Coco all day but...meh.
My favorite hobby involve money : shopping and a holidays.I guess after that it would be watching movies,reading(great time for me to have JUST finished the hunger games).I don't know,the only thing I can think of that would distract me would be a round the world tour with Coco a camera and a limitless credit card.
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  #23  
Old 03-29-2012, 10:27 AM
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Listen to the voice of experience

Breathe. One breath at a time.

You aren't going to be able to cut off thinking about all the "what ifs" and "what did I do wrongs" and all that other bullshit. The only recourse there is to let it flow through. THROUGH. Don't try to stop it, don't try to dam it up. Let it flow THROUGH.

The anger will come. It will be mixed in with sadness, and at some point it will hit you and the anger will be stronger than the sadness -- let that flow through as well.

Do what you need to do, whether it's being with friends or holing up by yourself and licking your wounds.

Never hurts to change something outwardly either, whether it's a hairstyle, new makeup, tweak your style a bit . . . Changing your outside really does help to get your inside with the program, silly as it may sound.
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  #24  
Old 03-29-2012, 11:18 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cloudcandy View Post
Oh and in terms of hobbies,pffftttt I'm in my final term of uni, I need to be working my ass off on a film project,it came to a standstill because i have bronchitis.I'm ill in bed which makes this worse,it's sunny outside I could have been in the park with Coco all day but...meh.
My favorite hobby involve money : shopping and a holidays.I guess after that it would be watching movies,reading(great time for me to have JUST finished the hunger games).I don't know,the only thing I can think of that would distract me would be a round the world tour with Coco a camera and a limitless credit card.
I am so sorry. But I agree with the rest, better to find out now and move on than to have it drag out.

Mer posted a what to read next thread you might want to check out

How about picking a trick to teach Coco?

Also remember how stressed you were when you got her? But you got through that its its now great, right? You can get through this, it WILL be ok.
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  #25  
Old 03-29-2012, 11:24 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dekka View Post
I am so sorry. But I agree with the rest, better to find out now and move on than to have it drag out.

Mer posted a what to read next thread you might want to check out

How about picking a trick to teach Coco?

Also remember how stressed you were when you got her? But you got through that its its now great, right? You can get through this, it WILL be ok.
Yeah that's what I've been thinking about,how much I felt when I had my Coco breakdown compared to now.I will cry less,eventually.I was hysterical last night.I'm still crying now.
I know its stupid but I'm embarrassed to tell people we failed.
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  #26  
Old 03-29-2012, 11:27 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Renee750il View Post
Listen to the voice of experience

Breathe. One breath at a time.

You aren't going to be able to cut off thinking about all the "what ifs" and "what did I do wrongs" and all that other bullshit. The only recourse there is to let it flow through. THROUGH. Don't try to stop it, don't try to dam it up. Let it flow THROUGH.

The anger will come. It will be mixed in with sadness, and at some point it will hit you and the anger will be stronger than the sadness -- let that flow through as well.

Do what you need to do, whether it's being with friends or holing up by yourself and licking your wounds.

Never hurts to change something outwardly either, whether it's a hairstyle, new makeup, tweak your style a bit . . . Changing your outside really does help to get your inside with the program, silly as it may sound.
Thank you.Tbh I just want to run away,but cant.O how bills trap you.
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  #27  
Old 03-29-2012, 11:31 AM
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Break ups suck. Big time.

You can always bring coco up to see me and bodhi and run around some fields/hills/beaches in the sunshine if all else fails!!!

Take it one day at a time. It will feel ok at some point.
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  #28  
Old 03-29-2012, 11:58 AM
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I am so sorry...

I am going to repeat some of what Renee said...

Breathe...nice, and deep breaths.

Pour your attention into what is important right now for you...just you! Finishing your education and Coco.

Moving on is hard...especially when you were so close for so long. The first thing you need is to find where you are, people tend to lose track of themselves a little in relationships. Take time, heal, and find yourself.

Breathe through the hurt... (((Hugs)))
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  #29  
Old 03-29-2012, 03:59 PM
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It's okay to be sad. I cried for months. I was angry for over a year... and yet one day I was just done with all of it. As cheesy as it sounds life goes on. You'll probably be up and down with your emotions and its all okay. Let yourself grieve your loss.
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  #30  
Old 03-29-2012, 05:02 PM
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You are in a tough place right now--hard to see how things can get better--but they will. Sometimes just writing things out can help you release some of the emotion--write whatever comes to your mind. You dont' have to keep what you write--you can rip it up, throw it away--or keep it if it helps.
Breathe--let yourself know that you will be ok--you can do this.
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