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Old 07-05-2009, 03:15 PM
snorzzz snorzzz is offline
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I have 3 dogs, all rescued. The latest one is a lab puppy, and we are beginning to have trouble. I am at my wits end, I don't know what to do, please help.

Please let me give you some info first. Hubby is 60 yrs. old, and I am 57 and partially disabled. We had a Catahoula Leopard for 14 years, and she died Jan. 10, 2008. We loved her deeply, but she was aggressive, so she was our only pet for 14 years.

In March of 2008, a friend "insisted" we adopt a little Yorky mix, about a year old and 9 lbs. We took him in and named him Buddy.
Two days later, the friend brought over an elderly, overweight rat terrier.
I'm saying no no no, but we took her in too. Her name is Tubby.(she came to us with that name)

After a few weeks, everyone adjusted, and we became a family. Bud and Tub both came from abusive backgrounds, so it took them awhile to learn to trust us and understand they had found their forever home. Over the months, we all settled into a nice routine. I'm the momma, home with them everyday; hubby is dad-dad and they look to him as pack leader. They love me, but they are madly in love with their dad-dad.

So we have been a family for about 14 months, and then hubby rescued a lab pup. He found the pup alongside a busy highway in the middle of nowhere. Someone had dropped the poor thing off, left him to die. The pup was just a baby, maybe 5-6 weeks old, weighed 7 lbs.

A couple days after hubby brought the puppy home, hubby had to go on a business trip and was gone for a week. It was one of the worst weeks of my life! I am disabled, and was not ready or even willing to have a puppy. My house and my body were not puppy-proofed. I made phone calls, trying to find a friend who would take the pup, but I got no takers. And Bud & Tub almost went into shock about the whole thing, I had to put up a gate and barriers all over the house.

We survived the week, hubby came home and I told him I could NOT handle a puppy, that he would have to help me. And he has helped, a lot.

We named the puppy Jack, and we have fell in love with him, of course.
But I've always had big concerns about how this would work out. I've always felt that Jack would have a better life with a young family, a family with children, coz he needs to run and play and be walked. We have a big fenced in backyard, but Jack prefers to stay inside coz it's so hot outside.

We have had Jack for 2 months now, he is about 14 weeks old, and 35 lbs. Beautiful dog, very very sweet, good natured dog.

But now here is the problem (sorry it took me so long to get to the point) :

When Jack first arrived, the older dog Tub didn't want a thing to do with Jack, so we kept them separated. But the little Yorky mix Buddy immediately became Jack's "momma". Buddy was bigger than Jack, and Jack fell in love with Buddy too. Buddy began training Jack, teaching him manners. They have been great pals, and that has been a big help to me.

But the last couple of weeks, especially the last few days, things have gone down hill FAST. Jack has realized that he is bigger than Buddy, and he is now terrorizing my poor little Bud. He is "man-handling" Bud, using his weight and his size to dominate Buddy. Chasing Buddy around the house, grabbing and pulling his tail, stealing his cookies, taking toys away from him, just constantly terrorizing Buddy. To the point where now Buddy is afraid of Jack! And this breaks my heart so much, coz they have been such great pals. So now we are having to keep Buddy & Jack separated. Buddy has been SO stressed out, he has not been eating well. He hasn't been himself, I thought he was sick and told my hubby to take Bud to the vet. But we finally figured out that Bud has had all he can take, that Jack has literally worn Buddy out, physically, mentally, emotionally.

Now that we have them separated (just started last night) , Buddy has already improved dramatically. He is much calmer, relaxed, and ate all his breakfast this morning.

So the big question is: What do I do?? I am at the point where I am wondering if we should try and find a home for Jack. I don't want to do that, but I can't let Buddy suffer any longer. Jack will only get bigger and bigger, and has a long way to go before he is no longer a puppy.

Please please help me figure this out, I don't know what to do.
Thanks so much for reading.
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  #2  
Old 07-05-2009, 03:26 PM
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SalemWitchChild SalemWitchChild is offline
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Personally given your situation and the breeds in question I'd rehome the lab. Labs are such high energy and given your disability he will not get the exercise he needs. WHich will result in the bad behavior already exhibited followed by destruction of your house and anything not tied down. Labs are such high energy. He really does need a family that can get out with him and give him a job to do.
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Old 07-05-2009, 03:40 PM
snorzzz snorzzz is offline
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Originally Posted by SalemWitchChild View Post
Personally given your situation and the breeds in question I'd rehome the lab. Labs are such high energy and given your disability he will not get the exercise he needs. WHich will result in the bad behavior already exhibited followed by destruction of your house and anything not tied down. Labs are such high energy. He really does need a family that can get out with him and give him a job to do.
Well, that is my worst fear, and brings tears to my eyes, but I know you might be right though. I am able to go outside with him and throw a ball, but that's about all I can do. I can't run and play with him, and I can't get down on the floor and play or teach him tricks while on the floor with him.

But if I give him away, it would be like giving away a family member, like giving away a child. It would be so so hard. And the BIG thing is, how in the world do I find a good home for him? I am going to be so picky and choosey, he's like my baby. (crying)

I have to be away from the computer for about 2 hours, I'll be back later.
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Old 07-05-2009, 03:47 PM
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lizzybeth727 lizzybeth727 is offline
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I agree with SWC, I think the best solution is to rehome Jack. To keep him would not be fair to him or to the other members of your household.

You could look into giving him to lab rescue, or fostering him for lab rescue until they can find a suitable home for him. It will be best to do it soon, though, while he is still young; the younger the puppy, the easier it is to find him a good home.

Good luck!!
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Old 07-05-2009, 03:50 PM
Thracian Thracian is offline
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I'm so sorry you're experiencing this. You've done a good thing by rescuing these dogs. But I have to agree that rehoming Jack sounds like the best option for your family. Since he is still a puppy, you should be able to find someone who will take him.

If you want to try and make things work, I would take him to a puppy kindergarten class ASAP. It sounds like he could learn some things, and the interaction with other dogs would definitely benefit him. You might also consider bringing in a trainer or behaviorist into your home to watch the interaction and make suggestions.

You're in a tough position. I think there are ways you might be able to make it work. They won't be easy. But if you decide to rehome him, it will be OK. You can definitely be as picky as you want to make sure he goes to the right place.

Good luck!
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Old 07-05-2009, 06:17 PM
snorzzz snorzzz is offline
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Thank you all so very much for your replies and advice, I appreciate it so much. But I must admit, I am crying while reading your replies, because I love Jack so much. While I was writing my first post, Jack was asleep, and then outside with my hubby for a couple hours. So he went a few hours without seeing me. And then when he saw me just now, he was all over me giving me lots of love and huge tail wags, like "where have you been momma!!"

Part of the problem is the fact that Jack has taken to me so much. You see, every dog we've ever had has ALWAYS chosen my hubby as their favorite. Not that they don't love me, I know they do, but they have always been "nuts" about my hubby. Dogs just love him. But Jack loves me like no dog has ever loved me. He has given me so much joy, so much love, and has been the light of my life these last 2 months. He is so full of life, and I have really enjoyed watching him grow up, discovering new things. Just being with him, looking into his eyes, giving him kisses, I just love him. If something scares him, he hides between my legs, that's his "safe place", hiding between my legs.

Well, I have to ask, how hard will it be for all of us to adjust if we give Jack away? How hard will it be on Jack? How hard will it be on Buddy? Buddy still loves Jack, and still wants to know exactly where Jack is at all times. If Buddy hears Jack cry or whimper, he runs to where Jack is, or runs to me to let me know Jack is crying.

Wow, this is so painful. If I knew, for a fact, I could find Jack a good home, then I think it would be for the best. Best for him, best for Buddy, best for me. "I think". If I could survive it. I know I would be sad for a very long time.

Before we got Jack, I had thought about getting another dog for a playmate for Buddy. But I was wanting a dog similar to Buddy, a Yorky mix, or basically a dog about Buddy's size. A small dog easy for me to handle. Nowhere in my mind did I ever think about getting a lab!!

So if we do end up rehoming Jack, I would want to immediately get another dog, a small dog, for Buddy.

BTW, I've been wanting to write this for a few weeks now, but I kept thinking and hoping things would work out.
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Old 07-05-2009, 06:32 PM
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If your set on wanting to keep him, I would look into trainers first. If you can afford the training and you really want to put the effort into it I'm sure you could make it work. Its just going to take a lot of time, money and patience.
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Old 07-05-2009, 06:59 PM
snorzzz snorzzz is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SalemWitchChild View Post
If your set on wanting to keep him, I would look into trainers first. If you can afford the training and you really want to put the effort into it I'm sure you could make it work. Its just going to take a lot of time, money and patience.

Yes I would love to keep him, but I think I am probably being selfish about it. In my heart of hearts, I know Jack would be happier, in the long run, if he were with an active young family. So I want what's best for him, I really do, I want him to have the best life possible.

At least here with me, he will be spoiled rotten, and well cared for. My fear is that, if I rehome him, he might end up tied to a tree all day, or maybe taken to the pound, coz labs aren't that easy to live with.

How do I go about finding a home for him? A few weeks ago, hubby took Jack to the groomers for a bath and nails clipped. I talked to the groomer on the phone about Jack, about trying to find a home for Jack. The groomer is a big supporter of the humane society, donates food and money. Well, the groomer told me the problem is there are thousands of "Jack's" needing a home, and that it would be almost impossible to find a home for Jack. It was at that point I decided we needed to try and keep Jack.
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Old 07-05-2009, 07:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by snorzzz View Post
Yes I would love to keep him, but I think I am probably being selfish about it. In my heart of hearts, I know Jack would be happier, in the long run, if he were with an active young family. So I want what's best for him, I really do, I want him to have the best life possible.

At least here with me, he will be spoiled rotten, and well cared for. My fear is that, if I rehome him, he might end up tied to a tree all day, or maybe taken to the pound, coz labs aren't that easy to live with.

How do I go about finding a home for him? A few weeks ago, hubby took Jack to the groomers for a bath and nails clipped. I talked to the groomer on the phone about Jack, about trying to find a home for Jack. The groomer is a big supporter of the humane society, donates food and money. Well, the groomer told me the problem is there are thousands of "Jack's" needing a home, and that it would be almost impossible to find a home for Jack. It was at that point I decided we needed to try and keep Jack.
Where are you located? Perhaps we can assist in finding a rescue organization that will be able to take him. I wouldn't put him in the local pound. Their already overrun with labs just like him. Your best bet is private run rescues.
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Old 07-05-2009, 07:10 PM
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I'll say it again - what about lab rescue? Have you searched in your area to see if there are any lab rescue groups around?

Rescue groups usually have very strict adoption guidelines, including contracts, and people that adopt dogs from rescue groups have to do reference checks and all sorts of things that proove that they will be a good home for the dog.

Like I also said before, puppies are much easier to adopt out - especially in rescues - than adults.

Yeah, labs aren't easy to live with - if it's in a household that can't exercise him or provide him the mental stimulation that he needs. Personally, I LOVE labs and probably wouldn't have any problem living with a lab (as do many other people on this forum), because I can give him the active life he needs. It's all relative.
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