Goals for your children

[Saje]

I used to have to and listen to motivational speakers, authors, etc as part of my job and one of them (Michelle Borba I think) said that it's a good idea for parents to decide on one thing they really one to teach their child/children and then reinforce it throughout their lives. Of course, you will teach them many things but if you have one main thing (being honest, working hard, being polite, etc) it will give you some directive and help you focus on how you want to raise your kids.

So the other thread (BC that took a side road) got me thinking about all the chaz parents and how you did/do want to raise your kids.

I don't know if we are going to decide one big ticket thing to teach fiona but I think above everything else it's important to me that she learns that she is valuable and has a strong sense of self worth. I think that even if we royally mess her up but she still feels valuable that she can overcome anything.

[Fran101]

well i dont have any kids but when it came to my mom raising me other than being polite and such. my mom put a BIG emphasis on living well and eating organically when i was raised, and still does now, and it has stuck with me.. health has always been a big thing with her

[Saje]

That would come in a close second for me. I want Fiona to learn from my mistakes. I was a skinny kid until my early 20s and always figured I'd have a fast metabolism. Not! lol I want her to learn that eating well and being active is a lifelong lifestyle.

[sparks19]

Well I think there are lots of important lessons that we need to teach her like being honest, hard working to get ahead... etc.

but as for that one REALLY important thing? HMMMM

I don't know but I honestly think the biggest thing on my list that is missing in so many kids and teens.... "RESPECT YOUR ELDERS and treat people the way you want to be treated"

Unless these elders are hurting you or something really inapropriate like that... there is NO excuse to talk down to your elders and disrespect them... EVER. EVER!!!!!!!

[Dakotah]

Originally Posted by Saje

I don't know if we are going to decide one big ticket thing to teach fiona but I think above everything else it's important to me that she learns that she is valuable and has a strong sense of self worth.

I apparently don't have kids now but whats highlighted in red, is the one thing I want to teach my kids. But I think you worded it better.

[sisco16]

I think as long as its something realistic, and attainable so your not setting high standards or the child to fail. Im in college now and my parents have always stressed my grades that it puts such pressure on me to do well. I sometimes think its not fair that they dont understand how hard i try but i dont pick things up as fast i was in special ed classes for years so that put me behind my classmates. So im struggling to compinsate the things i missed I may not be a 4.00 student but i give it all ive got.

[smkie]

Honesty, respect for herself and for those around her, doing the right thing even when it isn't the easiest thing to do. Try her hardest and follow her passion.

[mjb]

I don't really know that we emphasized one thing.....but, maybe it would be kindness. I just remember when they were teens, and one still is, and they're trying fit in by getting certain clothes, or, in the case of the current teen in my house, trying to be different by wearing certain things......
that I've tried to point out that who they are is not what they're wearing. They can and should treat people kindly and respectfully, and how they treat others is a big part of what defines them.....not their appearance.

So, I guess a big one (but not the only big one) to me is kindness.

[smkie]

I forgot one. Never to settle for anything but the real deal.

[GlassOnion]

I can't think of any one thing my parents emphasized over anything else. It was just all around 'be a good person' kind of stuff.

And I can't really think of anything I'd want to teach my kids over everything else. Maybe how to be analytical minded and think things through more (not to take things at face value, be that general stuff, people, laws, religion, politicians, classwork, etc) and see if it makes 'sense'.

For a long time I just kind of took things as they were presented to me and then finally started thinking for myself. Wish I had done that sooner, but I was never taught that doing so was 'OK', ya know?