Anyone else have this problem?

So I'm getting ready for bed and Mia comes and jumps onto the bed carrying this raggedy slobbery torn up stuffed elephant toy she's played with all day. I get annoyed and toss it onto the floor.

Mia: OH BOY! Mom is playing fetch! *launches herself off the bed, grabs the elephant and starts shaking the crap out of it. Then she runs and jumps back on the bed, carrying the elephant in her mouth.*

The elephant is plopped in my lap.

Me: No, I want to go to sleep! *toss the elephant to the floor*

Mia: Yay! *dashes off*

We repeat a few times before I give up and then put the elephant on the shelf next to my bed. I roll over and turn the light off.

Mia: whine whine whine. *jumps on my head and tries to reach the elephant on the shelf*

Me: GET OFF!

Mia: *crawls to the end of the bed*

5 mins later.

Mia: whiiiiiiiiiine.

Me: Grrrr!

Mia: whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine.

I try distracting her by petting her belly a while. When I'm done though I get bounced on again.

Me: *giving up* Here take the ****ing elephant.

Mia: YAY! *drops the elephant and dashes off to stare at me till I throw it*

/me haz a retriever...

So yes, except for the last four lines. And it doesn't have to be a toy...anything I toss instantly becomes a retrievable object.

Izzie does that with her Cuz balls... It ends up in the drawer eventually.

two words. * duct tape*

Just before bed Dekka seems to have a knack for finding the nastiest smelly chewie (ie bone) If its small I might not notice its in her mouth till she drops it on my pillow (bleck!)

My room is a no bone zone. No toys either. If I see her carrying one, I say 'thats not coming in here', or 'I don't think so' and she drops it lol.

I just had this happen:

I washed my bedding today so I brought it upstairs and threw it on my bed. I was putting my clothes away (throughout the week I end up with a pile of work pants and shoes on my floor and Friday or Saturday I get around to putting them away) and left my Bears sweatshirt and a pair of jeans on the floor since I'll be wearing them tomorrow. Auggie plods into my room and stretches out to nap on my clothes. He does this sometimes, it's weird, but I figure he must like the way my blue jeans smell...

So I go through the pile of bedding and find the pillowcases, put those on the pillows. Put the pillows and my nice, freshly washed comforter on the floor so I can make the bed. Start separating the fitted sheet and flat sheet since they have intertwined themselves in dryer... turn around, and Auggie is standing there staring at my comforter.
"What?" I ask.
He puts a paw on it.
"That is WAY too poofy for you to lay on." It's all wadded up so it's quite voluminous.
He looks at me and paws at it again. Then he proceeds to huff... then HACK. While standing over my freshly washed comforter. "Don't you DARE throw up on that, I JUST washed it." He stops hacking and looks at me.
"You can't climb on that. It's too big," I say again. He stares at me some more, then tries to climb on it so he can lay down anyway. The thing is poofed up to like three times his size, but he insists. After nearly falling off once, he manages to get half-situated on it and lays down.

Fine. I get the fitted sheet and flat sheet apart and proceed to dump the flat sheet on top of Auggie. "HA. Now what are going to do?"
He puts his head down and sighs and closes his eyes.
Stupid dog.
"Fine, but I'm going to need that soon, and what are you going to do then?"

So I get the fitted sheet on, and take the flat sheet off him (to which he lifts his head and stares at me, like "hey!") and put that on my bed. I'm smoothing everything down and he clambers off my comforter, then stands there looking expectantly at the bed. "What now?" He stares at me, then looks back at the bed.
"Oh no. You are NOT getting up on this bed," I tell him. Stare at me... stare at the bed.
"I'm not even done MAKING the bed," I say. Grab the comforter since he has now vacated it and put it on the bed.
Auggie stares at the bed some more the whole time I'm putting the comforter on.
"NO," I tell him.
So he goes and lays down on my pillows. As soon as I finish straightening the comforter and shoving my bed back against the wall, I have to chase him off THOSE so I can put THEM on the bed.

THEN he was eying my big warm Bears blanket, temporarily stashed on the floor since it usually sits at the end of my bed, and it's fleece-y so it attracts dog hair like whoa. "STOP IT. You can't get on that either. GO LAY ON MY CLOTHES." (And part of me can't believe I just told the dog to lay on my clothes...)
He gives me a veeeery woeful look, turns as sloooooowly as possible... and goes to lay on my clothes again. Where he heaves a hugely dramatic sigh at me.

He could have just stayed there the whole time. Stupid dog.

Lacey did this just last night (she does it MOST nights).... Except it was a plush groundhog toy.... that was sopping wet. Apparently she thought he was thirsty and put it in the water bowl before slinging it on my warm comfy pillow.....

Yay!

And when I say "NO! Go lay down!" She will make this face: Lay down, and sigh a big sigh. Ok, going to sleep now....





5 seconds later.... I open my eyes. (you know where this is going.)





Annnd Lacey's face (full of the wet nasty groundhog toy) is like 2 inches from my face....... "What about now? Is now good? Can we play now?"

We had a battle of the wills. Elephant on the shelf, Mia told to lie down. She lied down and stared at it wistfully for about half an hour before she fell asleep.

LOL!

I am sure she is planning a way to get you back!

Nope. "Go to bed" or "Go lay down" solve the problem. At night, tho, Caleb simply carries Elmo upstairs to our youngest son's room, does "the Elmo" for awhile, then curls up in his bed in our room. Mornings are when I tend to get something in my face- usually Elmo or a sock or slipper. That's when "Go lay down" comes in.

LMAO I wonder where the post is that I made about Auggie annoying me one morning, and I kept saying "Go lay down. Go to sleep. GO LAY DOWN." and he took that as an invitation to play bitey-hands at my hand and repeatedly throw the tennis ball at me...

I am really lucky that Auggie can't actually get ON my bed. He can jump up and stick his face in mine, but he can't get up on the bed (though I bet you if I put a hot dog on my bed he would miraculously find a way to get on my bed.) So if I put him on the floor I at least don't get him stepping all over me or dropping a tennis ball on my face.

HAHA me too!! When Harley doesn't have any tennis balls in the house. He usually steals a work sock from the laundry basket and brings it to me to play fetch with. I find this quite hilarious. When i walk back and put it in the laundry basket sometimes he will pick it back up later and bring it to me or he will look at me with "puppy dog eyes" and lay down and make a big sighing noise.

LOL Laurelin, you're giving me flashbacks to when I had an Australian Cattle Dog. "Don't make eye contact....don't push the toy on the floor....pretend we're asleep, maybe he'll go away...."