Reasons Dogs Don't Use Computers

MeatyTreats

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Reasons dogs don't use computers

* Can't stick their heads out of Windows '98.

* Fetch command not available on all platforms.

* Hard to read the monitor with your head cocked to one side.

* Too difficult to "mark" every website they visit.

* Can't help attacking the screen when they hear "You've Got Mail."

* Fire hydrant icon simply frustrating.

* Involuntary tail wagging is dead giveaway they're browsing www.chazhound.com instead of working.

* Keep bruising noses trying to catch that MPEG frisbee.

* Not at all fooled by Chuckwagon Screen Saver.

* Still trying to come up with an "emoticon" that signifies tail-wagging.

* Waiting for the introduction of the Microsoft Opposable Thumb.

* Three words: Carpal Paw Syndrome

* 'Cause dogs ain't GEEKS! Now, cats, on the other hand...

* Barking in next cube keeps activating YOUR voice recognition software.

* Saliva-coated mouse gets mighty difficult to manuever.

* Annoyed by lack of newsgroup, alt.pictures.master's.leg.

* Butt-sniffing more direct and less deceiving than online chat rooms.

* TpO HAqRD TO TgYPE WITyH PAzWS.
 

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