Would you tell a chazzer if you thought their dogs were too thin or too fat?
- Thread starter AliciaD
- Start date
How about trying to talk to forum members in regards to a health or safety issue?
I will never forget, a girl on another forum sharing photos of her horses eating from a gigantic pile of grass clippings (moist, wet, bagged grass clippings). This is a big no-no with horses and is likely to lead to colic or a mold toxicity... yeah, she did not appreciate the private message. I'm also a big believer in helmets for kids on horses, and the times I have tried to mention this in a roundabout, polite way..oh god people flip out. Or people using ibuprofen for dogs. I've definitely started minding my own business more.
I will never forget, a girl on another forum sharing photos of her horses eating from a gigantic pile of grass clippings (moist, wet, bagged grass clippings). This is a big no-no with horses and is likely to lead to colic or a mold toxicity... yeah, she did not appreciate the private message. I'm also a big believer in helmets for kids on horses, and the times I have tried to mention this in a roundabout, polite way..oh god people flip out. Or people using ibuprofen for dogs. I've definitely started minding my own business more.
Hmmmm...I think it depends. For example, my dogs ride loose in the car in the back seat. That puts them at risk if we're ever in an accident, but I'm unable to have them ride any other way, so I take the risk. I wouldn't appreciate being told over and over again that it isn't the safest way to ride in a car, when I KNOW, I just think that is what works best for us. But if I had never thought about the risks of them being loose in the backseat, I wouldn't mind someone bringing it to my attention.
So is their decision based on ignorance, stupidity, or an assessment of risk vs. benefit? If the first, I'd likely say something. You unfortunately can't change stupid. And if someone says, "Yes, I understand the risk involved, but I have made a choice to do this for XYZ reason", then I'd likely shut up and move on.
So...I guess mentioning something in a polite way, then moving on if they're anything but ignorant?
So is their decision based on ignorance, stupidity, or an assessment of risk vs. benefit? If the first, I'd likely say something. You unfortunately can't change stupid. And if someone says, "Yes, I understand the risk involved, but I have made a choice to do this for XYZ reason", then I'd likely shut up and move on.
So...I guess mentioning something in a polite way, then moving on if they're anything but ignorant?
This is a touchy topic...
Muffin was horribly underweight when young. I supplemented him and tried everything... Wouldn't gain a pound! Which is odd for a corgi, so it would seem I was neglected. But I didn't, I had tried everything. The vet said he'd rather see him under than over, and not to worry too much about it.
He was neutered at 2 and shortly after gained weight and is now on the pudgy side. We now struggle to keep the weight off!
Keeda has always been a lean dog and a picky eater but she always had enough rib cover that I was ok with it. Recently she lost a TON of weight, which along with a few other things prompted the vet visit where I found out she's diabetic. I'm now struggling to put weight back on her, but because she's diabetic it's not as simple as "just feed her more."
In both of these situations people have made/continue to make comments on their appearance and "care" as if I'm doing anything to try to help them. It's VERY frustrating and upsetting.
So my the reason for my long drawn out answer... If a dog was over/underweight enough to make me concerned for their health, I would probably creep all posts by the member and see if anything has been mentioned. I would then very carefully think of how to word something or maybe even PM them a carefully written message to elicit more information about if they were aware/concerned about the situation. But I wouldn't just outright state "your dog is too thin/fat and you need to fix it." Because I don't know the backstory... Maybe they have been trying very hard to change it.
But, on the rare occasion where I post a picture, I will also post that I know of any appearance issues to nip it in the bud.
Muffin was horribly underweight when young. I supplemented him and tried everything... Wouldn't gain a pound! Which is odd for a corgi, so it would seem I was neglected. But I didn't, I had tried everything. The vet said he'd rather see him under than over, and not to worry too much about it.
He was neutered at 2 and shortly after gained weight and is now on the pudgy side. We now struggle to keep the weight off!
Keeda has always been a lean dog and a picky eater but she always had enough rib cover that I was ok with it. Recently she lost a TON of weight, which along with a few other things prompted the vet visit where I found out she's diabetic. I'm now struggling to put weight back on her, but because she's diabetic it's not as simple as "just feed her more."
In both of these situations people have made/continue to make comments on their appearance and "care" as if I'm doing anything to try to help them. It's VERY frustrating and upsetting.
So my the reason for my long drawn out answer... If a dog was over/underweight enough to make me concerned for their health, I would probably creep all posts by the member and see if anything has been mentioned. I would then very carefully think of how to word something or maybe even PM them a carefully written message to elicit more information about if they were aware/concerned about the situation. But I wouldn't just outright state "your dog is too thin/fat and you need to fix it." Because I don't know the backstory... Maybe they have been trying very hard to change it.
But, on the rare occasion where I post a picture, I will also post that I know of any appearance issues to nip it in the bud.
I like to keep my dogs in pretty average condition, and a couple of times I've seen pictures posted on here and kind of gone, "Oh that dog's heavier/thinner than I would like." But as long as the dog isn't in poor health or the owner isn't seeking advice, I'd be hard-pressed to bring it up out of the blue. I generally assume that people on here are fairly aware of their dog's body condition and overall health.
I actually came across this issue with a FB acquaintance. She posted a picture of her shepherd puppy. It is only 4 1/2 months old. Then she posted the weight. 65lbs. I was in shock. She posted about how he was a food lover and never seemed to get enough and that he was a lazy, relaxed puppy. The picture of the pup is him sitting and you can see the fat rolls on him. He had to sit with his hind legs wide apart to handle the weight along with have his front legs well under him by splayed out some.
People were telling her how awesome and huge he looked and that he was going to get to be a giant sized boy(well over 100lbs). I was in shock that people were ok with this and even excited about this growing puppy carrying the same weight as a full grown dog of the same breed. The sire and dam of the pup are within standard, the pup left the breeder at a standard weight for the age it was at. It's siblings are growing at standard rates. I couldn't hold back. I had to let her know that a puppy is not suppose to weight that much at that age. I told her the issues that can happen with the joints and so on.
She got so angry. Telling me that her vet told her that puppies can never over eat or be fat. Then she showed me a picture of a previous male of the same breed who was very obviously well over 100+lbs. He could not even sit properly. Had to have his back legs completely slayed out in front of him. I almost cried when I saw the picture. She said her previous male had been just as large and was just fine. That he was just big boned and not fat. I was in shock that she could think that. Again I tried to tell her why responsible breeders recommend slow growth as healthiest for this breed and such. Nope she was just getting mad. Then add the fact she had told me she plans to breed him at just a year old and I had had enough. I took her off my friends list.
She still thinks what she is doing is just fine but I am glad I stated something. I could in no way associate her with what I know. I didn't want people to think I condoned those choices.
People were telling her how awesome and huge he looked and that he was going to get to be a giant sized boy(well over 100lbs). I was in shock that people were ok with this and even excited about this growing puppy carrying the same weight as a full grown dog of the same breed. The sire and dam of the pup are within standard, the pup left the breeder at a standard weight for the age it was at. It's siblings are growing at standard rates. I couldn't hold back. I had to let her know that a puppy is not suppose to weight that much at that age. I told her the issues that can happen with the joints and so on.
She got so angry. Telling me that her vet told her that puppies can never over eat or be fat. Then she showed me a picture of a previous male of the same breed who was very obviously well over 100+lbs. He could not even sit properly. Had to have his back legs completely slayed out in front of him. I almost cried when I saw the picture. She said her previous male had been just as large and was just fine. That he was just big boned and not fat. I was in shock that she could think that. Again I tried to tell her why responsible breeders recommend slow growth as healthiest for this breed and such. Nope she was just getting mad. Then add the fact she had told me she plans to breed him at just a year old and I had had enough. I took her off my friends list.
She still thinks what she is doing is just fine but I am glad I stated something. I could in no way associate her with what I know. I didn't want people to think I condoned those choices.
Well, I don't know.
Personally, I PREFER when people are very open and blunt with me. I can respect honesty, and although I might not like it, tongue-in-cheek comments irritate me so much more. I've been dying for someone to tell me Zander was overweight/underweight for over a year now on here. :rofl1: I just never outright asked it, which I guess was a problem because everyone here knows all the trouble I've been through with his weight and allergies anyway. And then recently he's not been able to exercise much AT ALL.
But just because I like blunt honesty, it doesn't mean others do. And I usually won't say anything unless someone asks or it is brought up, much like Linds said.
Personally, I PREFER when people are very open and blunt with me. I can respect honesty, and although I might not like it, tongue-in-cheek comments irritate me so much more. I've been dying for someone to tell me Zander was overweight/underweight for over a year now on here. :rofl1: I just never outright asked it, which I guess was a problem because everyone here knows all the trouble I've been through with his weight and allergies anyway. And then recently he's not been able to exercise much AT ALL.
But just because I like blunt honesty, it doesn't mean others do. And I usually won't say anything unless someone asks or it is brought up, much like Linds said.
This. I'd really be hard pressed to say anything to anyone. First of all, I would assume that if it was extreme enough to be something I'd even consider bringing up, they have probably already heard it from other people.
And I had Tristan, whose weight issues plagued him for more than 8 years (horse, but whatever). Yes, I knew it. No, it wasn't something I could really be upset at others for pointing out because - yes, he was too thin. But I was trying to move mountains to fix him, and every time someone brought it up, it stung a bit. Even when I knew they were right, and even when they said it nicely. Inside my head, I'd be screaming "I KNOW! DO YOU WANT TO SEE MY VET BILLS?!" while politely thanking them for the concern.
And I had Tristan, whose weight issues plagued him for more than 8 years (horse, but whatever). Yes, I knew it. No, it wasn't something I could really be upset at others for pointing out because - yes, he was too thin. But I was trying to move mountains to fix him, and every time someone brought it up, it stung a bit. Even when I knew they were right, and even when they said it nicely. Inside my head, I'd be screaming "I KNOW! DO YOU WANT TO SEE MY VET BILLS?!" while politely thanking them for the concern.