I was in a really dark place these past few days. Last night, I did something really stupid, and it scared me and I was afraid I'd do it again, so after a couple days of avoiding everyone, I finally broke down and called my SO and told him what happened. He came and got me and took me to his house, and we spent a long night talking about things and everything that I've been needing to do for a long time.
I feel so much better today. He does so much for me, I love him so so so much. I hope I don't go back. I don't think I will, at least not that bad. We talked about seeing a therapist, but I just don't know if I need one. Nothing causes my depression, it just pop up randomly, with absolutely no trigger.
But I'm finally happy again, so good news, yay.