This was so cute I had to share! (Joey has pulled a "flat basset" on me many times!)
Bassets are unusual dogs in that the games they play are not "politically correct" according to the rules of dogs of other breeds. This is because they are independent thinkers and will choose how to vary the game to their advantage.
For example: An Afghan Hound (a very fast breed) will run the fence perimeter in a game of chase and have a home base, while a basset takes the shortest distance between two points and will not respect the "home free" space. This allows the basset to get to the end point near when the Afghan arrives, much to the surprise of the Afghan. The poor Afghan then believes it has been outrun by a dog with no legs and the basset is feeling ever so powerful and clever and announces it to the Afghan.
This delights the true basset owner and frustrates those that likely should not have a basset in their life. Basset owners are full of incredible true tales of how their dogs "find" fun.
.. Fast Dog This game is called run as fast as your mini legs will carry you, holding your head in ear flying position. When engaging in this activity, the basset believes it is running like the wind, faster than a speeding bullet and no one/nothing can keep up with it. A true basset lover will not proceed beyond a jog, so that the dog's spirit will not be crushed and it's ego can maintain the pride of being the "fastest dog on the planet". This game is often played after a bath, when chasing chickens and birds on the beach, or when leaving with your Burger King Whopper that you so kindly left unattended.
..Stereo Chase In this game there are other dogs involved. One dog is "it", the others semi-chase it until it tires and sits or lays for a rest. All the bassets involved then take position around the "it" and bark until "it" can stand it no more and will run again. This is repeated over and over until someone else chooses to become "it" or the current "it" loses patience and/or screams uncle or simply goes deaf from the onslaught.
.. Bite the Leg (played only with other dogs) When you are a dog with no legs and what little you have is resting under your body, this is a very challenging game. Trying to nip each others leg while standing is the hard version. Lying down and nibbling on the other guy's leg is the most common form however.
..Bite the Face (played only with other dogs) This involves lots of open-mouthed "gumming", trying to trap the other guys muzzle in ones mouth. This is not a tough challenge, but will do when too tired to play Bite the Leg. When they go for the ears, this game needs to be halted as it can lead to hard feelings and loud squeals.
..Fetch With a few rare exceptions, this is not a very fun game with a basset unless you like to jog. Most take the attitude of, "You didn't want it so you threw it away. Why should I go get it just because you changed your mind?"
.. Hide and Seek Not all bassets play this. It will often be a game with a human. The human hides somewhere in the house and the basset has to "go find" It can also take the form of hiding around the kitchen island, the round about section of the house or around the shed etc. outside.
..Towel Toss Some basset use towels, others afghans (the blanket kind, not the hound type) or a small blanket. They may hide under it, walk around the house with it on them, peek through it or even toss it about the room.
..Tug-O-War Played with a towel, a rope toy or your laundry. It is not suggested to play this with items you wish them to use occasionally, nor with a young dog that is still developing his correct bite/jaw line.
.. Kill the Squeaker When you buy or make a toy, be aware that most bassets will focus on the squeaker as an item to be removed. It is not the squeak, but the challenged of removal. The same goes for stuffies that have eyes or noses. Most basset owners find latex and plastic toys a waste of money due to the "removal factor".
.. Eat the Underwear Bassets tend to have an undying fascination for underwear and socks, esp. if they have been worn. Beware where you leave them or they will be air-conditioned!
.. Flat Basset This is a game your basset will choose to play spontaneously...generally at bath time, when you want them to move over, or just move for that matter. It involves the Basset flattening itself onto the floor, often with legs spread out. The dog no longer weighs its original weight, but thousands of pounds and is virtually an immovable. Suggestions for winning this game may include using a crowbar, renting a back loader, or crane.
..SLUG In this game your basset becomes very slow to go or do what you would like. You may wonder if the dog is ill. A once "fast basset" is now painfully sluggish unless food is offered to enhance the speed of operation.
..Bumper Arm This is when you have a basset that is insistent on getting pets, or more pets NOW. Your arm or elbow will be elevated to new heights with no consideration to what may be in your hand or what your arm may touch, other than the basset itself.
Bassets are unusual dogs in that the games they play are not "politically correct" according to the rules of dogs of other breeds. This is because they are independent thinkers and will choose how to vary the game to their advantage.
For example: An Afghan Hound (a very fast breed) will run the fence perimeter in a game of chase and have a home base, while a basset takes the shortest distance between two points and will not respect the "home free" space. This allows the basset to get to the end point near when the Afghan arrives, much to the surprise of the Afghan. The poor Afghan then believes it has been outrun by a dog with no legs and the basset is feeling ever so powerful and clever and announces it to the Afghan.
This delights the true basset owner and frustrates those that likely should not have a basset in their life. Basset owners are full of incredible true tales of how their dogs "find" fun.
.. Fast Dog This game is called run as fast as your mini legs will carry you, holding your head in ear flying position. When engaging in this activity, the basset believes it is running like the wind, faster than a speeding bullet and no one/nothing can keep up with it. A true basset lover will not proceed beyond a jog, so that the dog's spirit will not be crushed and it's ego can maintain the pride of being the "fastest dog on the planet". This game is often played after a bath, when chasing chickens and birds on the beach, or when leaving with your Burger King Whopper that you so kindly left unattended.
..Stereo Chase In this game there are other dogs involved. One dog is "it", the others semi-chase it until it tires and sits or lays for a rest. All the bassets involved then take position around the "it" and bark until "it" can stand it no more and will run again. This is repeated over and over until someone else chooses to become "it" or the current "it" loses patience and/or screams uncle or simply goes deaf from the onslaught.
.. Bite the Leg (played only with other dogs) When you are a dog with no legs and what little you have is resting under your body, this is a very challenging game. Trying to nip each others leg while standing is the hard version. Lying down and nibbling on the other guy's leg is the most common form however.
..Bite the Face (played only with other dogs) This involves lots of open-mouthed "gumming", trying to trap the other guys muzzle in ones mouth. This is not a tough challenge, but will do when too tired to play Bite the Leg. When they go for the ears, this game needs to be halted as it can lead to hard feelings and loud squeals.
..Fetch With a few rare exceptions, this is not a very fun game with a basset unless you like to jog. Most take the attitude of, "You didn't want it so you threw it away. Why should I go get it just because you changed your mind?"
.. Hide and Seek Not all bassets play this. It will often be a game with a human. The human hides somewhere in the house and the basset has to "go find" It can also take the form of hiding around the kitchen island, the round about section of the house or around the shed etc. outside.
..Towel Toss Some basset use towels, others afghans (the blanket kind, not the hound type) or a small blanket. They may hide under it, walk around the house with it on them, peek through it or even toss it about the room.
..Tug-O-War Played with a towel, a rope toy or your laundry. It is not suggested to play this with items you wish them to use occasionally, nor with a young dog that is still developing his correct bite/jaw line.
.. Kill the Squeaker When you buy or make a toy, be aware that most bassets will focus on the squeaker as an item to be removed. It is not the squeak, but the challenged of removal. The same goes for stuffies that have eyes or noses. Most basset owners find latex and plastic toys a waste of money due to the "removal factor".
.. Eat the Underwear Bassets tend to have an undying fascination for underwear and socks, esp. if they have been worn. Beware where you leave them or they will be air-conditioned!
.. Flat Basset This is a game your basset will choose to play spontaneously...generally at bath time, when you want them to move over, or just move for that matter. It involves the Basset flattening itself onto the floor, often with legs spread out. The dog no longer weighs its original weight, but thousands of pounds and is virtually an immovable. Suggestions for winning this game may include using a crowbar, renting a back loader, or crane.
..SLUG In this game your basset becomes very slow to go or do what you would like. You may wonder if the dog is ill. A once "fast basset" is now painfully sluggish unless food is offered to enhance the speed of operation.
..Bumper Arm This is when you have a basset that is insistent on getting pets, or more pets NOW. Your arm or elbow will be elevated to new heights with no consideration to what may be in your hand or what your arm may touch, other than the basset itself.
