The Venting Thread
- Thread starter *blackrose
- Start date
I don't know why people have to worry about having a plan at all? They're dogs, most people aren't making a living off of them... just enjoy your dogs!
People as me a lot, and I just reply with something like.. "we're gonna try this but we'll just have to see" because if I decide I don't want to stick to the plan/ don't have money or time, I don't want to have to explain my reasoning.
People as me a lot, and I just reply with something like.. "we're gonna try this but we'll just have to see" because if I decide I don't want to stick to the plan/ don't have money or time, I don't want to have to explain my reasoning.
Every time I go to see Bailey, I have this urge to trial her. She adores obedience but the trials she might enjoy I am always working at. I am also terrified of breaking her (physically) when she's doing so, so, so well now.
I might ask Dr. Julia to feel her, measure her, and watch her move... because I really want to show her. If she doesn't get the all clear, I'd probably stop getting such an urge to take her out.
Sure, we'd be rusty but I miss working her! Her obedience is so flashy and fun!
I should probably use this as MORE motivation to get Gabby ready but she's just learning, so it's going to be a while!
I might ask Dr. Julia to feel her, measure her, and watch her move... because I really want to show her. If she doesn't get the all clear, I'd probably stop getting such an urge to take her out.
Sure, we'd be rusty but I miss working her! Her obedience is so flashy and fun!
I should probably use this as MORE motivation to get Gabby ready but she's just learning, so it's going to be a while!
I wish all motorcycles would DIE!!!!!!!!!
Why are we surrounded by people with crotch rockets ... who NEVER ride them... but insist on sitting on them for half an hour multiple times a day each and just rev them? Why? what is the point? If you aren't going to ride them you might as well plant something around them an make them a yard decoration
but NO... you have to choose the LOUDEST piece of junk to sit on 12 times a day and disrupt everyone around you for nothing. and thanks for waiting until 10 minutes after Hannah went to bed.
Why are we surrounded by people with crotch rockets ... who NEVER ride them... but insist on sitting on them for half an hour multiple times a day each and just rev them? Why? what is the point? If you aren't going to ride them you might as well plant something around them an make them a yard decoration
but NO... you have to choose the LOUDEST piece of junk to sit on 12 times a day and disrupt everyone around you for nothing. and thanks for waiting until 10 minutes after Hannah went to bed.
I am just so confused. My best friend, who I am totally in love with and have been in a relationship of sorts with for the past two years, started asking me a bunch of weird questions last night, like if I would ever be in a polygamous relationship and if I would be upset if he slept with our other friend. He was going on and on about how sex doesn't equal love to him, and I believe him, but it just left me feeling hurt and confused. I never get jealous, we aren't in a "real" relationship (we love each other very much and feel very strongly about each other and will be living together, but we've never "officially" started dating) so I shouldn't feel this way, but I do.
I haven't said anything to him about it yet. I know if I told him it bothered me, he would respect that, but I'm scared to tell him. It makes me feel petty and silly and dumb. I know him well enough to know that he's not going to fall in love with this girl and replace me or anything, but just the thought of him getting that...intimate and close with someone else, even if there aren't any romantic feelings there, hurts. I know it's a normal feeling, but I can't help but feel embarrassed by it. I never used to be this jealous and stupid.
I guess I want a "traditional" relationship more than I thought I did. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
I haven't said anything to him about it yet. I know if I told him it bothered me, he would respect that, but I'm scared to tell him. It makes me feel petty and silly and dumb. I know him well enough to know that he's not going to fall in love with this girl and replace me or anything, but just the thought of him getting that...intimate and close with someone else, even if there aren't any romantic feelings there, hurts. I know it's a normal feeling, but I can't help but feel embarrassed by it. I never used to be this jealous and stupid.
I guess I want a "traditional" relationship more than I thought I did. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
Dont get me wrong, all kinds of different relationships work for different people. The key is though being honest and truthful. You have to stand up for yourself and speak your mind. If you are not happy with something, yes, it may cause issues but its better than you hiding who you are or disrespecting yourself by going along just to not rock the boat.
And I don't get the "officially" start dating or "real" relationship.
Have you both been seeing other people the whole time?
Also, it is NOT at ALL petty to not want someone you are involved with (casual or not) to sleep with a friend. Sorry, I actually find that pretty tacky for him to ask unless it was a very common and explicit thing the whole time that he KNEW without a doubt that you were totally ok with (which obviously you are not)
And I don't get the "officially" start dating or "real" relationship.
Have you both been seeing other people the whole time?
Also, it is NOT at ALL petty to not want someone you are involved with (casual or not) to sleep with a friend. Sorry, I actually find that pretty tacky for him to ask unless it was a very common and explicit thing the whole time that he KNEW without a doubt that you were totally ok with (which obviously you are not)
polyamory is not "right" or "desirable" if its not what you are and feel comfortable with. sounds to me like this IS a serious comitted relationship of 2+ years and this is a big deal if hes feeling like hes poly and you are feeling like you arent. you and him need to sit down and talk about it, and stop feeling like you have no rights here to be making requests and statements because you "arent officially together". you ARE officially together. it was made official when your lives started coordinating around each others, wether the "official" words were spoken or not.
I agree with this. Not to offend anyone, but in my opinion, you're either together or you aren't. There are sometimes in-between stages in which you might need to 'figure things out'. But I found it incredibly hard to think of being with someone else when my SO and I were 'taking a break'. And no, sex does not equal love. But it definitely is a large part of it. Intimacy is a part of being in a relationship. (Not necessarily sex.) I guess I'm just not one of those people that could ever do a one night stand. Especially for women. Again, not saying this is true for everyone.
1) Totally okay (and pretty darn normal) to desire a monogamous relationship with someone you love. It's why shows about polygamous families have a captive audience--most people in the world can't fathom handling that sort of relationship.
2) You need to have the DTR talk. Define. The. Relationship. What are you? Where are you going? What does he want, what do you want from the relationship? Do you see a lifelong relationship here, are you killing time, are you just enjoying the here and now?
3) It is not petty or stupid to want someone to love and want only you. It is absolutely your right to ask for that if it's something you desire. I would shrivel up and die inside if my husband told me he wanted to be with someone else (whether now or while we were dating). That's not petty--it's completely fair to expect him to only care for me--it's what we promised each other. (See #2--figure out what you are committing to with each other, and go from there)
2) You need to have the DTR talk. Define. The. Relationship. What are you? Where are you going? What does he want, what do you want from the relationship? Do you see a lifelong relationship here, are you killing time, are you just enjoying the here and now?
3) It is not petty or stupid to want someone to love and want only you. It is absolutely your right to ask for that if it's something you desire. I would shrivel up and die inside if my husband told me he wanted to be with someone else (whether now or while we were dating). That's not petty--it's completely fair to expect him to only care for me--it's what we promised each other. (See #2--figure out what you are committing to with each other, and go from there)
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Totally agree
When did it become not cool to be in a monogamous relationship?
My opinion is that it was callous of him to ask but why pretend to be nothing for so long when it is clearly something? Tell him how you feel. Especially when it comes to paying bills together you need to be explicitly clear what you need. There is no SHAME in loving someone exclusively and expecting the same in return. That is NOT jealousy, it's normal. I wish society wouldn't make this stuff seem like it's pathetic or desperate. You are justified to feel how you feel but to not tell him out of fear of being petty or jealous is dishonest on your part and then you can't fault him
On acting on something you said was fine.
I have to wonder if he isn't saying this just to guage your reaction and see how you feel first without having to be the one to make the first " committed relationship " move
When did it become not cool to be in a monogamous relationship?
My opinion is that it was callous of him to ask but why pretend to be nothing for so long when it is clearly something? Tell him how you feel. Especially when it comes to paying bills together you need to be explicitly clear what you need. There is no SHAME in loving someone exclusively and expecting the same in return. That is NOT jealousy, it's normal. I wish society wouldn't make this stuff seem like it's pathetic or desperate. You are justified to feel how you feel but to not tell him out of fear of being petty or jealous is dishonest on your part and then you can't fault him
On acting on something you said was fine.
I have to wonder if he isn't saying this just to guage your reaction and see how you feel first without having to be the one to make the first " committed relationship " move
