LOL. No, you're not brushing her too much. That's good for her and good for your bond. I would try and coax her to go in and out on her own though, at least most of the time.
You know...some of those things you asked about are so hard to answer in black and white. You, first of all are second guessing yourself too much. This, in and of itself is showing a lack of confidence, which is understandable if you're not too familiar with this. BUT.....you do not want to pass this atmosphere onto your dog. That's where most people get into trouble. If you like taking naps with your dog, you should be able to do so. It's when you do want something your way or you do have some rules and you DON'T enforce them that you often get problems with a dog. Decide....write down on a piece of paper what you want from your dog, what things you expect, what you don't want your dog to be doing, how you want your dog to behave in certain situations and then write down a plan on how you're going to teach those things and how you're going to enforce them, even when you're distracted by conversations with people or trying to get things done around the house etc. Teach your dog manners and have your dog earn some of the things she likes and needs. Be firm, consistant and insistant, but patient, calm and rewarding. Don't let her have everything her way. But...you have to teach her what you want, show her what you mean. And make it rewarding when she complies.
I love taking naps with my dogs...a little squishy on the couch with one Chihuahua, one Chi mix and one 95 LB Doberman. My Chi sits on my lap lots of times while I'm on the computer. I wouldn't think of not having a Chihuahua sit on my lap. And my Doberman can't be on the couch with me without having at least on body part touching me or draped over me....not in his vocabulary. LOL. Is this spoiling? Well, not if I'm not having any behavior problems. My dogs do as they're told, follow the rules, are polite when they want something, don't knock me down going outside, wait for things, come when called. They don't beg or whine, not much anyhow. LOL. Not one of them has ever once showed any miniscule hint of resource guarding toward me or any other type of "nastieness." They get along most all the time...sometimes one little vocalization from Chuli or Jose toward Lyric when Lyric is being a pest and wanting to play and they don't want to, but nothing much. Lyric never ever has shown one iota of nastiness to them. He is such a sweet natured, happy two year old Doberman. I just love that dog. And my little Chi chi's are awfully sweet too, spoiled if one wants to call all that stuff spoiled. But spoiled is really, by definition ruined....like food that's gone bad. So, unless you let her have her own way about everything and tell you how to run your household, you shouldn't have problems at all. Be a clear, confident, gentle, but firm leader and she'll repect you. Decide ahead of time what you want and then make a plan to go by.