I just keep getting bad news.

bogolove

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#1
Last night my mom called me and told me that my grandfather, who is 88 years old, has colon cancer. He was supposed to have hip surgery last week and they noticed something was off in his blood so they ran some tests. They are doing surgery on him either next week or the next week.

Then this morning my mom forwarded me an e-mail from my aunt, and my uncle's esophageal cancer has spread to the back of his neck and the start of his spine. They said the mortality rate for performing this surgery is 25% and my uncle's is even trickier since his windpipe is involved. So, basically at this point, they are just trying to make him comfortable. I guess, they didn't mention anything they could do.

I feel sort of in a state of shock right now, even though I know my uncle has been sick for several months, I kept thinking he would have the surgery and get better.
 
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#2
Beth, I wish there was something I could do or say to take some of the pain and dread. You know that you and yours will be in our thoughts and that you've always got a family of shoulders waiting for you to lean on here. ((((HUGS))))
 

Doberluv

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#5
I don't want to take away from your thread. But I wanted to say that I just lost my brother (55 yrs old) last Friday. He had a brain tumor for a couple of years which finally got the better of him.

The whole family has been suffering along with him for this time and when his time came, it was so sad because it is so final, something you put out of your mind, just a little as the loved one is sick or dying. But....in a way it helps because you know it's coming and then you see that your loved one isn't suffering anymore and it's almost a relief. But the initial shock of finding out that there is nothing they can do, is almost more than one can take.

My brother was brave and graceful and maintained a sense of humor until the very end. He was in the final stages and wanted to make it to his birthday, which was May 12. He went on for a little longer. On May 13, he woke up and said to his wife, "I'm still here? Why am I still here?" And chuckled at his little joke. He didn't want anyone to hurt anymore than they did and never once complained.

I will always miss him but our life must go on. So, I wish you peace and calm, enough to get through this difficult time. I'm so sorry.
 

bogolove

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#6
Thank you all so much, and Doberluv, I am very sorry about your brother. My uncle is also very young, only 56, I hate to see this for him. The last time I saw him was at Easter and I was strong and upbeat and happy, and I think he had a really good time, and he ate more than he had in weeks. He has a hard time getting food down because of the tumor and the scar tissue from his previous cancer. He ate tons of my mom's wonderful potatoes and cheese and he even ate a piece of my cheesecake.

But he can only drink about 3 boosts a day, and that is all he can get down now.
 

Doberluv

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#7
Thank you...

It's all terribly hard to watch, isn't it. My brother hadn't eaten for a month...maybe a few bites. He just couldn't seem to do it. It's amazing he lasted that long.

I'll be thinking of your uncle and your grandpa. This happens to everyone all the time. But somehow, when it's close to home, it seems like it's only happening to your loved ones. We, in our society have an especially hard time dealing with death...so much more than many other cultures, I think.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.
 

roni

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#8
I am so sorry to hear about your grandfather and your uncle. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
 

Debi

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#9
Oh, bogolove...my thoughts and many prayers will continue to go to you and your family. I know all too well what you feel....it's something I haven't talked about on the general forum....but my brother has prostate cancer. He is only 55..an amazing man. He retired from the army after 20 years and became a policeman. He is such a good person. That is why I sometimes post the importance of family...of cherishing every moment. My little brother has been battling lymphoma. HUGS to you. Guess we just have to savor every moment we have. Many, many hugs to your family.
 

oriondw

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#14
Its hard loosing people you love and know. Im sure you'll come out in good shape though :)

Just keep positive thoughs and you'll be alright.

Be thankful that you can be near them, nothing worse then knowing but not being able to be there for them.
 

Barb04

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#15
Beth, Debi & Doberluv my prayers go out to all of you. I've been there too with my brother and dad passing away of cancer (colon, multiple myeloma). It's so hard to see them go through this. I still cry but know that at least they are no longer in pain and now at peace.
 

bogolove

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#17
My mom told me today that my uncle was given 2 weeks to 2 Months. He says he is going to try to keep fighting though. I just thought I would update you guys on the situation. Thank you to everyone for your love and support.
 

Doberluv

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#20
Oh,Debi...thank you and I too send my hugs your way. I know what you must be going through. Brothers are special.

Hugs to all.
 

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