Memories

It is nearly 4am and I find myself sitting here wide awake when everyone else is sleeping. I just spent that past hour going through old posts.

I made the mistake of reading a previous thread I started back when Gretta was sick. I remember that day I posted that thread and how low I felt. I had so much sadness in my heart. I didn't ever think I would get over the day she took her last breath.

I stupidly read through the whole thread and found myself in tears within seconds of starting to read it. It brought back that sad day with a vengence. Oh gosh I relived the whole thing all over again.

I feel so empty and sad right now. I know it's probably a natural response when you rehash sad moments in your life. I just loved my dogs soooooo much and to lose all 3 of them within such a short time nearly killed me.

I just wanted to know if anyone else starts to cry at the drop of a dime when old memories are triggered of beloved pets who have passed on to the rainbow bridge?

I wish I could get that vivid memory of her last breath out of my head. I don't think I will ever forget that day.

I used to cry thinking about sad things from my past.
I don't anymore.........i think that as i am aging i am losing something........if you know what i mean.
I just don't seem to be anywhere near as emotional as i did when i were younger.

Nancy,
I definitely feel this way when I look at old pictures of my past dogs, or sometimes I relive the moments by rereading what I wrote about them. Sometimes the thought just passes over me and I break down again. It's just not something you can completely get over. I think it gets much easier to deal with but there's always that feeling hanging over you that is always there. It's never not sad anymore. There are certain stages of grief that people go through. The last one is acceptance and that's the best you can do.
I often have that vision of the last time I saw each of my dogs. The feeling that they are in a better place is what keeps me going after Rosie's death. My other dog, Mandy, was hardly a year old when I got her. She just wasn't ready, and that's my biggest regret. I still blame myself for what happened to her and I don't think that feeling will ever go away.

I must have either been very new here or not yet a member when you lost your dogs. I'm so sorry that you lost not only one beloved friend..but three. When I read this post I felt in my chest exactly what you're going through. The last dog that I lost (Rosie) died in my arms. I try so hard to picture all of the heaven sent wonderful moments but it never fails...I end up back where we were when she slipped away. It will be three years for us this January. It was unexpected, she had a seizure and never came back. She went into cardiac arrest and I just couldn't believe it. I layed on the floor at the clinic and held her sobbing for what seemed like an eternity. How could it be possible, I thought.
I can't imagine going through that times three. There are times when I just need to sit with her urn, go through all of her photos, take big deep whiffs of her old winter sweater and sob like there's no tomorrow. I know I'll see her again, I'm crying now...and staring at her grandson (Amos) with immeasurable gratitude.

I do feel like you. I'm one who doesn't forget a date so I remember their birthdays and the day they went to doggie heaven. I know one thing, if we didn't love them as much as we did and they loved us, we wouldn't get so emotional about them. I miss them all.