Chaz Moms and Moms-to-Be Chat (everyone welcome)

Barbara!

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Thanks ma'am! :)

So, how many of you chose not to get your son circ'ed and dealt with family issues because of it?
 

milos_mommy

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What do you mean by family issues? Do you mean concerns about the son's penis looking different from his father's? Or just commentary on family members about why you should have circumcised?
 

Barbara!

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What do you mean by family issues? Do you mean concerns about the son's penis looking different from his father's? Or just commentary on family members about why you should have circumcised?
Liiiiiike shouting matches in the living room because they think you're going to raise your baby to be a "freak".
 

jenv101

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Liiiiiike shouting matches in the living room because they think you're going to raise your baby to be a "freak".
I wouldn't even entertain discussion about it if they are being like that. Not their decision at all, so the subject is closed!
 

milos_mommy

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Well personally for me, any "family" member who spoke to me like that wouldn't be considered family (or given the opportunity to share their opinion on child rearing) for very long.
 

stardogs

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Oh that's ridiculous. I'd not even try to reason with that person - "this is not up for discussion." Walk out of the room if necessary. Heck, if the person won't be changing your baby's diaper there's no reason it even needs to be brought up, ever.
 

Barbara!

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Yeah. They're my parents, and I'm living with them, so I have little choice. I told them the subject isn't up for debate and that's when they came unglued. My decisions to not raise the baby in a church, not have the baby baptized, not have the baby circumcised, to not spank, to not allow much TV, to feed only organic foods and other decisions like that were brought up. Blah.
 

Romy

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Yeah. They're my parents, and I'm living with them, so I have little choice. I told them the subject isn't up for debate and that's when they came unglued. My decisions to not raise the baby in a church, not have the baby baptized, not have the baby circumcised, to not spank, to not allow much TV, to feed only organic foods and other decisions like that were brought up. Blah.
You do have a choice, don't let them bully you. Just tell them that it can't be put back on later, but if he wants to have to procedure done when he's old enough to say so, he's free to have it done.

My inlaws flipped out like that. They cold called me every few minutes over the course of severals days to scream at us over the phone. I found it quite disturbing that my MIL was so obsessed with her grandson's genitals actually. :( It got to where the constant phoning was really creepy and the only argument she could think of was that he'll be embarrassed in the locker room. Which isn't even a good argument because about half of boys aren't having it done now.
 

milos_mommy

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The thing is...when your parents were born, and when you were born, MOST baby boys were circumcised in the US. And although there were never any conclusive studies about medical benefits, and circumcision has always been done for religious, cosmetic, sexual, or hygienic (before it was possible to bathe daily) reasons, doctors DID (incorrectly) tell our parents it was 'healthier' or 'safer' to get it done.

Ask your parents why they think the baby should be circumcised. They might think he wants to look like everyone else, and as Romy said, now circumcision rates are about 50% and declining. They might think it's "cleaner", which was a reason for circumcision during periods long ago in history when it wasn't possible to bathe regularly. They might think it prevents infection or is safer, which is just downright a myth, and having them read any information on circumcision should inform them otherwise.
 

jenv101

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You look fantastic!

Just had my midwife appointment. Measurements are perfect, heartrate was bang on, and I got to hear (and feel!) my baby girl kick the doppler twice. My daughter already has attitude.
Thanks :) Thats great about your appt! My girl likes to kick anything that puts pressure on my stomach too - it's pretty funny!
 

Barbara!

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The thing is...when your parents were born, and when you were born, MOST baby boys were circumcised in the US. And although there were never any conclusive studies about medical benefits, and circumcision has always been done for religious, cosmetic, sexual, or hygienic (before it was possible to bathe daily) reasons, doctors DID (incorrectly) tell our parents it was 'healthier' or 'safer' to get it done.

Ask your parents why they think the baby should be circumcised. They might think he wants to look like everyone else, and as Romy said, now circumcision rates are about 50% and declining. They might think it's "cleaner", which was a reason for circumcision during periods long ago in history when it wasn't possible to bathe regularly. They might think it prevents infection or is safer, which is just downright a myth, and having them read any information on circumcision should inform them otherwise.
Yup, that's their reasoning, and I sent my Dad quite a few articles on it all, and he just raged even more about my "beliefs". Lol. They're silly I guess.
 

Taqroy

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I was just listening to samples from a baby noise CD and Tipper (who is laying in the corner) had NO reaction whatsoever, but the spud started beating on my rib cage. Weird. Lol.
 

sillysally

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Soooo last night I realized most of my (at times, quite racist) family does not know I'm having a mixed race child.

Teee Heee can't wait to surprise them with that one.
When my unmarried cousin got pregnant it was a big deal because not only is the family Catholic, but the father is black. Her parents didn't even didn't tell anyone she was pregnant until a few months before she was due.

When my grandma was telling me about the pregnancy at a family gathering she leaned forward and whispered "You know the baby is going to be black, right?" It was a strange moment.

Your family will get over it, mine did.
 

milos_mommy

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It just...didn't even occur to me to mention to my extended family. I told my grandma when we were first dating that I was seeing someone, and she asked what he was like after I got pregnant...I just said something like "he's really nice and works a lot" or whatever. I'm assuming my cousins have seen pictures but I can't imagine they'd tell my aunts anything.

My parents have both met him numerous times. My mom knows he's Hispanic (and has plenty of comments on that), but apparently doesn't know he's also (supposedly) part black. I found out when she said she tells people the name I picked they ask if the baby is going to be black. She says "no". She is mistaken.

That's also when I realized my dad probably has no idea who I was talking about when I told him I was pregnant. He said "you mean that real chatty guy?" And I was like "uhhh, sure?". My dad never remembers my friends names or faces.

They're not like horrible bigot hateful racists who will be mean to my child or me because of it...they just make a lot of stupid ignorant comments.
 
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love this replacement to the capcha

I swear every mixed baby I've ever seen has been so **** adorable!
Thats because they are :)



Other them my mother no one in my family knew I was pregnant till the morning after I had my son lol. My mother was VERY against me being with Kel at first warmed up to him while I was pregnant and LOVES him now.
 

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