Sir Gus, Miss Perle, and Monsieur Max..

True.. I can imagine the infomercial now..

"Protect YOUR garden, with Pickled Egg Joe.. Take him down the pub for 8 pints of Lager, making sure he is well watered, then give him a jar of pickled eggs, and allow him to stagger home, to use Joe to his fullest effect you will have changed the locks, and called his mother to tell her what a bum her son is.. Shout abuse at him from the bedroom window, so that all the neighbours KNOW he will be sleeping in the garden.. And bingo, no more problematic vegetable theft"

Of course, you can't go smoke in the general vicinity of the yard without having a gas explosion :rofl1:

You know, this has all the earmarks of a Monty Python skit . . .

Oh how I love Monty Python.. I am convinced I was born too late, and sooo should have been a part of the team..

I shall never be able to look at a pickled egg ever again without tittering now.. Pickled egg Joe will be a legend from here on in..

*ponders an all female version of Monty Python*