Chaz Moms and Moms-to-Be Chat (everyone welcome)

sparks19

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uh--there? And again--everyone is free to view/comment on any thread they would like to--there is no defined exclusion here....not sure why that is even a consideration?
I think she was just saying that just because you have an opinion doesn't mean it has to be shared (not that she COULDN'T post here). Yes Dragoness is free to post where ever she wants and the thread does say everyone welcome... but WHY post that? Somethings are best kept to yourself lol. If you think pregnant women are hideous, let that be your dirty little secret. No need to share it in a thread specifically about pregnancy and parenthood lol
 

Baxter'smybaby

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I think she was just saying that just because you have an opinion doesn't mean it has to be shared (not that she COULDN'T post here). Yes Dragoness is free to post where ever she wants and the thread does say everyone welcome... but WHY post that? Somethings are best kept to yourself lol. If you think pregnant women are hideous, let that be your dirty little secret. No need to share it in a thread specifically about pregnancy and parenthood lol
Boy do I agree with THAT! I think how things are worded make all the difference in the world--something we all could remember before hitting the submit button!
 

JessLough

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uh--there? And again--everyone is free to view/comment on any thread they would like to--there is no defined exclusion here....not sure why that is even a consideration?
I didn't say she couldn't. Somebody else asked why she is even in the thread (right here, actually):

Why are you in this thread?
to which her response was she was in the thread because it said everybody is welcome. I simply told her that just because it says everybody is welcome, does not mean you HAVE TO post in the thread, since apparently she only posted in it because it says everybody is welcome.
 

Baxter'smybaby

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I didn't say she couldn't. Somebody else asked why she is even in the thread (right here, actually):



to which her response was she was in the thread because it said everybody is welcome. I simply told her that just because it says everybody is welcome, does not mean you HAVE TO post in the thread, since apparently she only posted in it because it says everybody is welcome.
That's your interpretation--but I also saw her asking questions....and I think suggesting she doesn't need to post is about the same as saying "stay out"--just my perspective in reading through.
As for the rudeness...again, I think in a different thread, other's comments are rude. Do I agree with the way she worded that? No--but I just want to be clear that it doesn't mean she can't view/post in the thread!
 

sparks19

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I don't think that she doesn't need to post anything ever but there have been multiple posts from her saying borderline (or soemtimes outright) insulting things about pregnant women and their bodies and what they are doing with it in this thread (and in other threads) and I think this was just the post that broke the camels back and made everyone wonder why post here if she has such a distaste for pregnant women.

I don't think anyone is prepared to run her out of town or anything but what she said was hurtful to some people and Chaz has never been a place where people hold in their feelings when someone feels like they are being insulted lol
 

Danefied

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I see pregger women at the store waddling around & I think "why do that to yourself?" It's seems so ... Unattractive lol (don't mean to be insensitive ... Just saying) also I she seen a lot of women after baby & it's not mug better ... No thanks, not worth it for me.
Lucky for me I don’t base all attractiveness on outward appearance, neither does my DH :)

I had a weird shaped belly that spread out to the sides and was uneven with one twin butt and one twin head pushing it out more on one side than the other. I had to wear a bandaid on my belly button that was red and raw, I had a giant greenish blue vein etched all over my right breast, and I grew hair in places no woman should ever grow hair.
DH laughed right along with me, cut my toenails when I could no longer reach them, helped me shave my legs, and when I had a placental abruption and bled like a stuck pig he was the one helping me out of my blood soaked pants and underwear and in to the hospital gown.

Nearly 10 years later, my body has spread and sagged, my hair is greying, my eyes stay crinkled even after I stop smiling, and guess what? DH continues to find me attractive, and even better, so do I ;)
 

~Jessie~

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I see pregger women at the store waddling around & I think "why do that to yourself?" It's seems so ... Unattractive lol (don't mean to be insensitive ... Just saying) also I she seen a lot of women after baby & it's not mug better ... No thanks, not worth it for me.
Thing is... age is going to catch up with EVERYONE, and there isn't a way to escape it. Look at Diane Keaton, who is nearing 70 years old age:



I think she looks AWESOME for being in her sixties... but she still has wrinkles and I'm sure a head of grey hair underneath the brown. MOST SIXTY SIX YEAR OLD WOMEN DO NOT LOOK LIKE THIS. Chances are, you will be more wrinkly and saggier than her, and it's something you are going to have to live with. Even if you have tons of money to drop on plastic surgery, you're still not going to ever look "young" again.

From all of the threads about babies and breastfeeding, you sound VERY concerned about what people think about your appearance. Breast feeding is weird and only non-human animals should do it. Pregnancy gives you a huge belly and makes you unattractive.

I know you mentioned a handful of times that your boyfriend/fiance is controlling. Does he think pregnancy is disgusting? Is he concerned about the possibility of your body changing? Because if he IS, and this is a big reason why you don't want children, you should really consider leaving him. Someone who TRULY loves you doesn't care if you have a few extra stretch marks and some saggy skin. You're going to have it sooner or later, anyway.
 

~Jessie~

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Thing is... age is going to catch up with EVERYONE, and there isn't a way to escape it. Look at Diane Keaton, who is nearing 70 years old age:



I think she looks AWESOME for being in her sixties... but she still has wrinkles and I'm sure a head of grey hair underneath the brown. MOST SIXTY SIX YEAR OLD WOMEN DO NOT LOOK LIKE THIS. Chances are, you will be more wrinkly and saggier than her, and it's something you are going to have to live with. Even if you have tons of money to drop on plastic surgery, you're still not going to ever look "young" again.

From all of the threads about babies and breastfeeding, you sound VERY concerned about what people think about your appearance. Breast feeding is weird and only non-human animals should do it. Pregnancy gives you a huge belly and makes you unattractive.

I know you mentioned a handful of times that your boyfriend/fiance is controlling. Does he think pregnancy is disgusting? Is he concerned about the possibility of your body changing? Because if he IS, and this is a big reason why you don't want children, you should really consider leaving him. Someone who TRULY loves you doesn't care if you have a few extra stretch marks and some saggy skin. You're going to have it sooner or later, anyway.
 

Paige

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I see pregger women at the store waddling around & I think "why do that to yourself?" It's seems so ... Unattractive lol (don't mean to be insensitive ... Just saying) also I she seen a lot of women after baby & it's not mug better ... No thanks, not worth it for me.
It was worth it to me and every other mother in this thread... and hey... my kids are 2 years apart, last one came out 3 weeks ago. This was taken 9 days postpartum. So suck on that.

 

sparks19

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Oh yeah to answer "why do that to yourself"...

Because being a mother is AWESOME. Hannah is 5 and SO much fun....

Plus a lot of the things I enjoy are more socially acceptable if I have a child with me LOL
 

Fran101

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Jessie brings up a good point. I had totally forgotten about the boyfriend issue.

..I for some reason assumed you were like..15.

Fran, you're like my favorite person in the world.
Fran there's no way that you're 21. You are entirely too...I was going to say smart but I think wise and eloquent are better choices.
THANK you Fran!!!!!

You put in words exactly what my thoughts were reading her posts. I am worried for her based on what she has written.
This. Excellent post Fran!
awww shucks you guys <3
 

Dakotah

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It was worth it to me and every other mother in this thread... and hey... my kids are 2 years apart, last one came out 3 weeks ago. This was taken 9 days postpartum. So suck on that.

Best post EVER <3
Rock on, momma, rock on :thumbup::headbanger:
 

milos_mommy

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UHHHH so I just found out my mom has shingles.

I'm mildly freaking out. I've never had the chicken pox, I was vaccinated though. Right now we're staying FAR away from each other but I'm still REALLLLLY concerned.

I have to call my dr in the morning and see what the risk is...I may need to find a friend to let me crash on their couch for two weeks :(
 

Dogdragoness

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The difference is I don't care if you think my dog is ugly, you dot have to live with them. & I have had some "ugly" dogs in the past.

Why does it matter what I say or think so much anyway, fine I won't back track fine insaid it I don't understand why someone would put themselves thru something like this, yes I am rather vain , not the prettiest girl on the block but I do like myself as I am now & I don't want to jeapordize it.

I have no self esteem issues I assure you & whatever I say on the computer I would also say in face to face Convo, I don't fear disagreement
 

JessLough

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UHHHH so I just found out my mom has shingles.

I'm mildly freaking out. I've never had the chicken pox, I was vaccinated though. Right now we're staying FAR away from each other but I'm still REALLLLLY concerned.

I have to call my dr in the morning and see what the risk is...I may need to find a friend to let me crash on their couch for two weeks :(
Shingles is not like the chicken pox - you can't catch it by being in the same room. It's rare for somebody to even catch it by touching the person with shingles - generally only if you touch weeping spots. Due to this, it's generally safe to be around somebody with shingles when pregnant, just try and avoid direct contact.

Obviously still call your doctor, but I hope it can make a feel a little better before you can call them.
 

milos_mommy

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Just because you don't get offended or hurt when people say you're unattractive, doesn't mean others don't. Keep that in mind.
 

milos_mommy

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Shingles is not like the chicken pox - you can't catch it by being in the same room. It's rare for somebody to even catch it by touching the person with shingles - generally only if you touch weeping spots. Due to this, it's generally safe to be around somebody with shingles when pregnant, just try and avoid direct contact.

Obviously still call your doctor, but I hope it can make a feel a little better before you can call them.
Thanks, Jess...but when my mom got home and said "I don't feel well and look I think I have hives" GUESS WHAT GENIUS GRABBED HER ARM AND STARTED POKING HER RASH TO SEE IF HURT.

I do feel better, but the doctor told her it was HIGHLY contagious and she should not be in the same room as me or anyone for that matter. She was under orders to stay "quarantined". I'm hoping the doctor was just being super-safe but...idk.
 

sparks19

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The difference is I don't care if you think my dog is ugly, you dot have to live with them. & I have had some "ugly" dogs in the past.

Why does it matter what I say or think so much anyway, fine I won't back track fine insaid it I don't understand why someone would put themselves thru something like this, yes I am rather vain , not the prettiest girl on the block but I do like myself as I am now & I don't want to jeapordize it.

I have no self esteem issues I assure you & whatever I say on the computer I would also say in face to face Convo, I don't fear disagreement
So you don't care at all about other peoples feelings? Some people are more sensitive and that is fine, some people aren't sensitive at all and that is fine too but we should try to care about being sensitive to others
 

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