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Well, what are your opinions? Doable or not?
I was in one for about 9 months while I was away at uni. It was horrible and stressful and one of the worst experiences ever... We fought constantly towards the end, and I am really surprised we made it through, tbh. We had been dating about 2 years when I left for uni. It took a few months to patch up the hurt feelings, but things are back to being good again and I moved to a much closer university where I can see him all the time. The stress and anxiety are gone, thank god.
Anyway, he wants to be a doctor. We have now been dating for 3.5 years. Yesterday, he mentioned that when he gets his degree finished (in the next 2-3 years), he will be applying to the local med schools, ones across North America and a few in Europe, most likely. This hit me a lot harder than I thought it would.
Ever since he told me, I have been feeling some anxiety about it, and a lot of crappy mixed feelings. At the same time that I want him to pursue what he wants to do in school, I can't help but feel a little betrayed and put on the back-burner, so to speak. There is a bit of resentment in that I moved schools to save our relationship (so to speak) and yet in 2 years, he will be happy to travel all over the world for 4 more years of education. When I acted somewhat dismayed, he said I could always go with him after a while... But I am super close to my family and am not sure I would want to live in Europe, the US, or even across Canada. On top of that, as a graduate student I know for a fact money would be tight and going somewhere far would likely be out of the budget.
I also can't help but wonder if, after hearing that he is rather willing to go far, staying in the relationship is a good idea... It sounds drastic I know, but if I am already upset about it after dating for 3.5 years, than what would it be like after dating 5.5-6.5 years? I mean, I am hoping to be married in my late 20's I feel like it would hurt even more, and that I would have wasted a ton of time on a relationship that would be bound to end. Oh and I am not saying this is necessarily THE guy lol, just the one I have been dating for quite a while and still really, really like. I had NO intentions of breaking up with him and was not questioning the relationship until this point.
And call me a pessimist, but long distance for upwards of a year just wouldn't work, nevermind 4 years. I can't do Christmas and a month in summer visitations only - I just know I can't Props to all that can, I'm just not one of them.
I feel like a selfish, bad person. I don't even know if I want answers... Maybe I just needed to admit these feelings to someone and Chaz was a good outlet? lol
I was in one for about 9 months while I was away at uni. It was horrible and stressful and one of the worst experiences ever... We fought constantly towards the end, and I am really surprised we made it through, tbh. We had been dating about 2 years when I left for uni. It took a few months to patch up the hurt feelings, but things are back to being good again and I moved to a much closer university where I can see him all the time. The stress and anxiety are gone, thank god.
Anyway, he wants to be a doctor. We have now been dating for 3.5 years. Yesterday, he mentioned that when he gets his degree finished (in the next 2-3 years), he will be applying to the local med schools, ones across North America and a few in Europe, most likely. This hit me a lot harder than I thought it would.
Ever since he told me, I have been feeling some anxiety about it, and a lot of crappy mixed feelings. At the same time that I want him to pursue what he wants to do in school, I can't help but feel a little betrayed and put on the back-burner, so to speak. There is a bit of resentment in that I moved schools to save our relationship (so to speak) and yet in 2 years, he will be happy to travel all over the world for 4 more years of education. When I acted somewhat dismayed, he said I could always go with him after a while... But I am super close to my family and am not sure I would want to live in Europe, the US, or even across Canada. On top of that, as a graduate student I know for a fact money would be tight and going somewhere far would likely be out of the budget.
I also can't help but wonder if, after hearing that he is rather willing to go far, staying in the relationship is a good idea... It sounds drastic I know, but if I am already upset about it after dating for 3.5 years, than what would it be like after dating 5.5-6.5 years? I mean, I am hoping to be married in my late 20's I feel like it would hurt even more, and that I would have wasted a ton of time on a relationship that would be bound to end. Oh and I am not saying this is necessarily THE guy lol, just the one I have been dating for quite a while and still really, really like. I had NO intentions of breaking up with him and was not questioning the relationship until this point.
And call me a pessimist, but long distance for upwards of a year just wouldn't work, nevermind 4 years. I can't do Christmas and a month in summer visitations only - I just know I can't Props to all that can, I'm just not one of them.
I feel like a selfish, bad person. I don't even know if I want answers... Maybe I just needed to admit these feelings to someone and Chaz was a good outlet? lol