Dad shoots laptop because of FB post

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I liked it because it's one of those things everybody wishes they could do at some point, but probably don't. Many of us would like to say to some punk teenager or dillhole at some point in our lives and shoot the tires out from their car, or smash their laptop, or how 'bout a copy machine? Reminds me of a movie :)

It's not the way most would deal with it in real life, it's probably not the "best" way to deal with it either. I know I was a mouthy, unappreciative teenager once too. Rarely did one action teach me anything. Sometimes things were dealt with rationally and calmly. Sometimes I was punished, sometimes they could see I learned all I needed to without anything even being said. It seemed the larger the screw up, the less that was done or said, but not always :)

Sometimes someone, not necessarily my parent's would do or say something way out of line (even looking back now, way out of line) sometimes I pissed me off more, sometimes I said, dang, they're right. Other times I thought they were complete ****ing asshole and didn't listen to a word they said, but in the course of future experiences, i learned my first reaction or impression of that person wasn't correct. Other times I learned I was dead on :)

Learning happens every day in good and bad ways. I believe the guy when he says himeself, his daughter and her mom are OK with what happened, and that they are the only ones that matter.

I don't think this one thing will end all learning or ruin this girl for life. If it does, she doesn't have much of a future.
 

Dekka

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Seriously. I have had 20-30 parent conferences this year for my problem students, and in just about every one it's immediately apparent why the child is being a brat. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

There are the occasional outliers where parents do everything "right" and child is a screw ball, but it's rare.
This has been my overwhelming experience with teens (and whilst not a school teacher I made my living teaching teens to ride, shlepping them to horse shows, having them sleep over for shows etc) Firm respectful parents seemed to end up with delightful kids. Not to say there weren't rough patches, but how the parents responded to the rough patches seemed to have a huge impact on how the kids ended up. Sure a one off thing isn't a big deal, but I don't think this father is a patient firm level headed parent when it comes to rough patches. The fact he thinks there was nothing wrong with his response speaks volumes.

The kids who got into big trouble were the ones who felt they couldn't trust their parents when push came to shove. Not saying you want to be your kids friend (at least not till they are adults) but you do want your child to WANT to come to you with serious issues vs do their hardest to hide it from you.
 

Southpaw

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I think it's funny.

Was it the "right" thing to do? I don't know, but who ever makes the right decision 100% of the time? It's not ruining this girl's life.

On the other side of it though, I feel like I could be that girl... I complain about having to do stuff around the house all.the.time. I can vent about it wherever I want. I think that's just something every parent puts up with. So it seems like an overreaction. I don't necessarily think she needed a "lesson", she was just being a 15 year old venting about the typical things that a 15 year old would vent about.
 

Snark

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I think it's funny.

Was it the "right" thing to do? I don't know, but who ever makes the right decision 100% of the time? It's not ruining this girl's life.

On the other side of it though, I feel like I could be that girl... I complain about having to do stuff around the house all.the.time. I can vent about it wherever I want. I think that's just something every parent puts up with. So it seems like an overreaction. I don't necessarily think she needed a "lesson", she was just being a 15 year old venting about the typical things that a 15 year old would vent about.
I think if she had just vented to her friends, either by phone, email, or text, it would have been no big deal. She chose a public forum and KNEW she was in the wrong since she took pains to block her family and church friends...

Was it a parenting fail? Possibly, but a lot better choice than the idiot who beat his 9 yr. old to death because the kid didn't vacuum the house...
 

Lilavati

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Was it a parenting fail? Possibly, but a lot better choice than the idiot who beat his 9 yr. old to death because the kid didn't vacuum the house...
Beating your 9 year old to death is not a parenting fail. Its a crime. And saying "well, its better than beating your kid to death" ain't saying much.

That said, I disagree with the editorials I've seen floating around on the internet calling it child abuse. The logic is that if he'd shot his wife's computer, it would be domestic violence. Yes, it would, because he would have no right, legal or moral to discipline his wife or destroy her property. Moreover, the vibe of using a gun to destroy your wife's property is extremely off.

Whereas he has the right to to discipline his child, and although I don't really think he has the moral right to permanently destroy her stuff, he probably has the legal right to do so. I think he's a jerk who has made a really crappy parenting choice . . . not a child abuser.
 

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